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This room is for general discussion that doesn't specifically fit into one of the other CatholicMatch rooms. Topics should not be overly serious as this is to be more of a "cafe setting."

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Spiritual Directors

Jul 20th new
Do you have a Spiritual Director? How did you go about finding him/her. Would you share what your relationship is like? i.e. how often you meet, topics for discussion, are you allowed or expected to give them money for their time... Any answers and or suggestions would be greatly appreciated!

Blessings,
Teresa
Jul 20th new

Hi Teresa,

I have a lay spiritual director (married woman) that I found through another friend. She previously worked at a retreat center doing spiritual direction, but is now retired. I do not pay her, but I have from time to time given her a small gift (nice ornament at Christmas, a book we've talked about or she might like, etc.) in appreciation for all she does. I do think paying a spiritual director is certainly allowed and those associated with a retreat center (for a guided personal retreat) often have a suggested fee via the retreat center.

From the beginning my spiritual director and I both sensed that somehow God was in our meeting, and our conversations often feel like prayer. God is definitely present with us. We talk about anything and everything - current life struggles, decisions, circumstances - but most importantly how God is in those things and what my prayer is like. She often suggests ways to seek God in a specific circumstance or to go deeper in prayer (staying with a particular question, reflecting on a particular passage, etc.) She both supports and encourages/challenges me. I will say though, that the practical things going on in life are a big part of the conversation, and that was a pleasant surprise (prior to doing spiritual direction I thought we'd only talk about prayer, but it is immensely helpful to talk about the circumstances of life through the lens of faith with someone! Such a gift!)

I think some dioceses now have lay spiritual director formation programs, so for those seeking a spiritual director that might be a good starting point in finding one. The vocations director would also be a good contact person who might know of men and women within the diocese who offer spiritual direction.

I'm curious to see other peoples experiences and thoughts too. I dragged my feet for years in finding a spiritual director (afraid of the unknown), but it has been only a blessing! God bless, Sarah




Jul 20th new
Thank you Sarah for all your info! I'll be praying on this and hopefully God will lead me to someone as nice as your Spiritual Director. Blessings, Teresa
Jul 20th new
I've had a lay spiritual director for several years. She has helped me multiple times with spiritual issues and questions. Most of all, she's helped me learn more about my Catholic faith. I learned about her through a mutual friend. I saw her regularly (once a month) for about a year and now I see her every two to three months or sooner if I need help. She will only accept donations and she leaves the amount up to me. I try to be generous because her help is so valuable to me. You might try calling your diocese. Mine has a list of Spiritual Directors.
Jul 20th new
From what I understand, there is usually some payment or donation for spiritual direction. The website below suggests $50 per session as an appropriate donation. One of my inlaws was recently certified as a spiritual director, but I have not discussed this with him in any detail.

www.lantericenter.org



Jul 21st new
(quote) Jan-805954 said: I've had a lay spiritual director for several years. She has helped me multiple times with spiritual issues and questions. Most of all, she's helped me learn more about my Catholic faith. I learned about her through a mutual friend. I saw her regularly (once a month) for about a year and now I see her every two to three months or sooner if I need help. She will only accept donations and she leaves the amount up to me. I try to be generous because her help is so valuable to me. You might try calling your diocese. Mine has a list of Spiritual Directors.
Thank you Jan!
Jul 21st new
(quote) Richard-831657 said: From what I understand, there is usually some payment or donation for spiritual direction. The website below suggests $50 per session as an appropriate donation. One of my inlaws was recently certified as a spiritual director, but I have not discussed this with him in any detail.

http://www.lantericenter.org/spiritualdirection.htm



Thank you Richard!
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