The surgeons seem really good which is comforting. They said that while her condition is pretty rare, the procedure itself is relatively routine. That said, two of the hospital's (actually in the whole state) top colorectal surgeons will be in on it. Which is comforting and discomforting at the same time.
Anyway, I have had this pit in my stomach since the surgery was scheduled that something bad was going to happen. Yes, surgeries gone wrong are rare, but they DO happen. My worry isn't necessarily related to the kind of surgery but just to surgery in general. I've watched way too many Grey's Anatomy marathons in which a common surgery goes wrong. Heck, just last night, I was reading in Readers Digest, and there was an article about botched surgeries. I mean, I know surgery is common-place, people have them every day, and I think nothing of it. Now, I can't stop thinking about it.
Every little thing that comes up has me wondering if it is some divine providence. My mom wanted to paint her bedroom a more masculine color. Is it because she anticipates my Dad having the room to himself? People have been dropping by to visit. Is the Lord giving them one last visit? My cousin who was supposed to go back to school decided to delay going back till after the surgery. Why did God put it on her heart to wait? And so on and so forth. I keep thinking about her high blood pressure and the medications she is on, and what if her blod clots?
I go on Google and read about the procedures and all that, and I read testimonials from people, and it calms me down, but then I go too far and read too much, and start reading all the really bad stuff. I keep going back and forth...am I having some sort of legitimate intuition, or is the Devil just causing me all this excess doubt?
Anyway, so prayers are much needed. (I forgot to pray the Novenas that I was going to pray, I could just kick myself) And any light you can shed on my anxiety would be much appreciated.