Talk to each other and listen to each other.
And -- regularly, without fail -- make time for each other away from jobs, chores, kids, parents, friends, to just be the two of you. All those things are like newspapers piled on top of a beautiful dish. If you clear them away, the beautiful dish is revealed to you again and again. If you don't clear them away, eventually you forget that the dish is there.
The biggest regret I have about my marriage is that only once in 18 years did we go away for a weekend alone. It was wonderful: free from all those distractions I re-discovered the wonderful, fun man I fell in love with. But the whole time I was thinking, "Where have you been all this time?"
You will find people change and grow during life and during the relationship so new ways to. Keep your relationship strong will happen naturally in most cases. If you have speed bumps or pot holes in the relationship you must or ought to work to get over them by communicating and really learn to hear each other.
How do we keep the love burning?
Maybe it could be doing new activities together? or maybe stay attuned with one another's love languages?
Or would it be that love is a unique experience for everyone that sad to say, there are no written formulas or proven methods that guarantee its success?
Because sometimes in the world right now, and I see this too among my friends, that we confuse love with its expression.We tend to consider love as love because it is passionate but then do we reduce it to a mere feeling?
I'm not saying here that love does not need to be expressed. However, it is not limited to it. Love is not just a passion, it is also spiritual. Its not just about feelings. So that when I no longer feel it, I no longer love the person.
I remember one time, we were discussing with one of our college professors. He actually loves his wife very much. And he shared that at some point, he was before something that he could no longer express. He was living the experience of love but it was beyond any definition. He stood right there before that person and he knew that it was her. He was simply being drawn to her.
Perhaps there were fine qualities in her that made him love her so much.
But it was more than that, because first of all, there was an experience of a person.
Of loving that person beyond his/her qualities and shortcomings, beyond his/her moods and likes... in a way mysterious because it tells us that all experience of love will always be unique - because it is all about a person. Love unites two persons together. And within that love, there's also a constant call to discover and to know the person for what he or she is. And we know that knowledge leads on to love, so then, we can also say that we can only love that person more and more.
Yes, we need to know the love language of that person, we need to know what activities we could share together, to stir one another in love. But still they should all lead us to the very heart of the experience with that person. To know that over time, anyway, our activities may change... our physical appearance may change... but there's something in each person that will remain the same...
... which will always be worthy of our love.