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This room is for general discussion that doesn't specifically fit into one of the other CatholicMatch rooms. Topics should not be overly serious as this is to be more of a "cafe setting."

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eyepopping Last week, my sister mentioned running into her former landlady who told her she got
divorced. My sister was surprised. The landlady said her husband reconnected with his high school girlfriend on there and I guess they want history to repeat itself. I've heard this from others also - people looking up old girlfriends/boyfriends and then.. see ya!

I know of someone whose wife found out about his love child through Facebook! Oh dear.

Foiled by Facebook!



Aug 16th new
(quote) Julie-42315 said: Last week, my sister mentioned running into her former landlady who told her she got
divorced. My sister was surprised. The landlady said her husband reconnected with his high school girlfriend on there and I guess they want history to repeat itself. I've heard this from others also - people looking up old girlfriends/boyfriends and then.. see ya!

I know of someone whose wife found out about his love child through Facebook! Oh dear.

Foiled by Facebook!



"Oh dear" indeed about finding out one's husband has a love child.. I've also heard the same story about a couple who's wife was always on FB and she cheated on her husband with her ex on FB. Since then the poor man is traumatized about FB.
Personally, I don't think that FB is wreaking people's marriages, but that it's the enemy (devil) working through FB to ruin peoples marriages.. Yet at the same time.. If these couples had been putting God first in their marriages then their marriages never would have fallen apart. Or if you want to take God out of the picture, I can simply state that if these marriages were meant to last then the people who left never would have left in the first place. If it's meant to be, then it is meant to be.

Aug 16th new

Technology is a mixed bag. The "Spousebusters" site includes the following:

Do you have a sneaking suspicion that your spouse, child or employee is up to something?

Our Mobile Monitoring Software will give you answers you are looking for! Our software is perfect for keeping track of your childs mobile and internet usage, monitoring your employees daily activities or finding our who your spouse stays in touch with. By secretly recording events that happen on the target phone, such as sms messages, emails, web browsing and phone calls, you will always know where your target is and what he or she is up to. All this information is conveniently delivered straight to your web account!

Meanwhile, The Wire notes:

The Wall Street Journal's Elizabeth Bernstein reports that the web is making it easier than ever before to seek revenge on a cheating spouse. Bernstein tells the story of Jacquelyn Eschbach, an editor in Philadelphia:

When she found out her husband was cheating on her last March, she logged onto his Facebook account, deleted all his privacy settings--allowing anyone to see his page--and created a new status update for him: 'Moving back to my mom's because my wife caught me cheating with a woman from work.'




Aug 16th new
Wow! Well, parents checking on their kids' Internet usage for safety reasons seems reasonable. What is that acronym some kids use, "POS" Parent Over Shoulder?!! boggled

But if one spouse is checking on the other spouse - some will argue trust issues, invasion of privacy, overly jealous???

But I guess people with nothing to hide, hide nothing. scratchchin



Aug 16th new

I wouldn't say it was so much as FaceBook itself that wrecked that marriage; the problem was a lack of fidelity. FB provided an opportunity for that man to reconnect with his past girlfriend and he chose by his own free will to have an affair. He could have easily chosen to maintain only a platonic relationship with her and still remain faithful to his marital promise with his wife, but he didn't. He chose to refuel the attraction he had for his ex-girlfriend and deliberately drift away from his wife. If he had prioritized his marriage like he was supposed to, that whole affair would have never happened. What these people with past lovers need to do is learn to leave the past behind them and stop trying to feed the passion they felt for their exes. I think I'd be pretty uncomfortable dating someone who had dated others in the past because of reasons like this; she might not have truly let go and may easily still be treasuring past romances in her heart. -_-"

Still, FB can and does tend to interfere with relationships. My brother and his wife are struggling with their marriage right now and it's mostly due to the interference of outsiders' opinions. Whenever they seem to get a disagreement finally settled, she posts everything on FB and all of her friends and relatives begin to comment; "You know, if I were you...", and so she feels obligated to take their opinions which leads to her starting the whole disagreement with my brother all over again!

Aug 16th new
(quote) Nicholas-1102675 said:

I wouldn't say it was so much as FaceBook itself that wrecked that marriage; the problem was a lack of fidelity. FB provided an opportunity for that man to reconnect with his past girlfriend and he chose by his own free will to have an affair. He could have easily chosen to maintain only a platonic relationship with her and still remain faithful to his marital promise with his wife, but he didn't. He chose to refuel the attraction he had for his ex-girlfriend and deliberately drift away from his wife. If he had prioritized his marriage like he was supposed to, that whole affair would have never happened. What these people with past lovers need to do is learn to leave the past behind them and stop trying to feed the passion they felt for their exes. I think I'd be pretty uncomfortable dating someone who had dated others in the past because of reasons like this; she might not have truly let go and may easily still be treasuring past romances in her heart. -_-"

Still, FB can and does tend to interfere with relationships. My brother and his wife are struggling with their marriage right now and it's mostly due to the interference of outsiders' opinions. Whenever they seem to get a disagreement finally settled, she posts everything on FB and all of her friends and relatives begin to comment; "You know, if I were you...", and so she feels obligated to take their opinions which leads to her starting the whole disagreement with my brother all over again!

Technology is a tool and how you use that tool determines itm Moral merit.
Aug 16th new
(quote) Charles-976166 said: Technology is a tool and how you use that tool determines itm Moral merit.
Yes, exactly! And if it's allowed to be a distraction, then a distraction is what it will be.
Aug 16th new

for me it is something I need to "ration" I have a new computer and I have been wasting far too much time on facebook.

Aug 16th new
Paul, I hold you responsible for the "Ghostbusters" theme now playing on an infinite loop in my head. "Spousebusters" indeed.
I would agree that FB is a tool but keep in mind that the word "tool" has been perverted in current slang.
In the absence of FB, people would still find ways to self-destruct.
Aug 16th new
(quote) Nicholas-1102675 said: My brother and his wife are struggling with their marriage right now and it's mostly due to the interference of outsiders' opinions. Whenever they seem to get a disagreement finally settled, she posts everything on FB and all of her friends and relatives begin to comment; "You know, if I were you...", and so she feels obligated to take their opinions which leads to her starting the whole disagreement with my brother all over again!
I can see wanting to get an outside opinion on something...but posting your personal problems on FB ..definitely not the right thing to do. boggled Praying
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