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This room is for discussion on entertainment, movies, television, jokes or light-hearted topics. Please keep discussion clean and appropriate for a Catholic site.

Saint Vitus is the patron saint of actors, comedians, dancers, and of entertainers in general.
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05/16/2012 new
(Quote) Brian-252799 said: When I was 11 I was away on vacation with my parents,aunt and cousin.I saw a wooden bulkhead that looked like i...
(Quote) Brian-252799 said:

When I was 11 I was away on vacation with my parents,aunt and cousin.I saw a wooden bulkhead that looked like it would be fun slidding down on.Halfway down my shorts slipped.OUCH Splinters. I held my behind not knowing what to do.I pulled up my shorts and went into the house,but those slivers made it hard to sit.I was kind of afraid to tell my mom and aunt because they believed in spanking and my bare bottom at their mercy was a dreadful thought.
Before I went to bed I at last came clean.
My dad held my arms.my cousin held my feet,and my mom and aunt gleefully did the picking and all I could do was howl. I guess they got to the bottom of things. It took a while to get them out.Everyone got a laugh out of it except me.

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sounds very painful....poor Brian

Perhaps we need to put up a sign that declares today "Be nice to Brian Day"

wink
05/17/2012 new

Oh,you folks are just too much to me laughing
Keep the stories coming,if only to please Theelaughing
Oh,my sides I ache in pain laughing
A good laugh is much to obtain laughing
Brenda,Ginger,and all the others here wave
And the newcomers from Everywhere biggrin
Keep the laughs coming and keep us all merry clap laughing
A Grand Prize for the best could be a bottle of Sherry. Cheers!

05/17/2012 new

(Quote) Brian-252799 said: Oh,you folks are just too much to me Keep the stories coming,if only to please Thee Oh,my...
(Quote) Brian-252799 said:

Oh,you folks are just too much to me
Keep the stories coming,if only to please Thee
Oh,my sides I ache in pain
A good laugh is much to obtain
Brenda,Ginger,and all the others here
And the newcomers from Everywhere
Keep the laughs coming and keep us all merry
A Grand Prize for the best could be a bottle of Sherry.

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I don't drink Sherry hug

05/17/2012 new

When we were kids, one of my older brothers didn't finish his dinner. He went into the fridge and grabbed a peach. My father who had quite a temper was furious with him for not finishing his dinner. He demanded the peach back and my brother handed him a tennis ball. My father didn't even realize it - he threw it into the fridge without looking at it and my brother went upstairs and ate the forbidden fruit. Score: funny son - 1 mean dad - 0. laughing laughing

05/17/2012 new

A passenger plane on a cross country trip runs into a terrible storm. The plane gets pounded by wind, rain, hail, and lightning. The passengers begin screaming. They are sure the plane is going to crash and they are all going to die.

At the height of the storm, a young woman jumps up and exclaims " I can't take this anymore!" I just can't sit here and die like an animal, strapped to a chair. If I am going to die, let me die feeling like a woman! Is there anyone here man enough to make me feel like a woman?

She sees a hand raise in the back of the plane, and a muscular man walks up the aisle toward her seat. As he approaches her he takes off his shirt. She can see the man's muscles, even in the dim light of the plane.

He stands in front of her, shirt in hand and says to her, "I can make you feel like a woman before you die." Are you interested?"

She shakes her head, yes.

As the man hands her his shirt, he says : "Here, iron this!"

05/17/2012 new

LOL = laughing laughing laughing

Great way for me to start my Day! Thanks Richard! hug

05/17/2012 new

Last summer I took my 15-yr-old son to see where I grew up—Chicago. We were wandering around downtown, checking off the sites in our tour book, and one of the last ones for the day was the Federal Reserve building (my son wanted his free bag of shredded money). We were a little distracted by all the stores and architectural detail as we walked, and suddenly felt unsure that we were heading in the right direction. “Let’s step over here and pull out the map,” I said, gesturing to some cement posts on the edge of the sidewalk next to the street. As we turned to lean against them and my son went to fish out the map from my backpack, I looked up and burst out laughing.
Engraved on the wall in front of me: “Federal Reserve.”

05/17/2012 new

The story is funnier with all the details, but time prohibits.

About 17 years ago my son parks his car out front of the house and goes to bed early. A half hour later, my neighbor tells me my son's car is leaking gasoline and he can smell it inside his house. Yep! I looked to find a hole in the tank; leaking at about the rate of a urine stream. I rush to the tool drawer and retrieve a rubber faucet washer and tapping screw to plug the leak.Following that, I got the garden hose and flushed the gasoline down the storm sewer. Problem solved.

I awoke my son of the incident, and he responds: "Oh yeah, Dad. "I ran off the road and drove over a two-posted sign. No one was around so I drove off. "I noticed my gas tank was leaking, so I plugged it with chewing gum."

Another 30 minutes passes, and the neighbor is back at the door. "Your son's car is leaking gas, really bad. He adds: " The fumes are now all over the neighborhood, so I called the fire department, in case someone tosses a cigarette out near it." I rush back outside and re-inspect the now, larger leak. (Did you know gasoline will melt through a rubber faucet washer?)...

The fire department arrives and up go these large telescoping stadium lights. Great! The entire neighborhood is now out in their front yards, curiously watching this now bright lightly lit civic fau paux. We were the new neighbors and now I'm wondering if we will ever be accepted. I lay the hose under the car to keep the flush going while I unsuccesslfully try every common household material known to man to bung plug the hole.

The fire chief hollers for me to turn off the water, while he is calling on his radio...

Within 20 minutes, a small army of white EPA SUV's arrive and cordon off the entire neighborhood from traffic. Oh No! I swear, it looked just like the final scene from E.T. I kid you not! White and yellow, radiation looking, respirator suits and all..

EPA and Fire Chief: "Mr. M. YOU HAVE JUST CAUSED A MAJOR ENVIRONMENTAL DISASTER!" your flushing of fuel into a storm sewer has fed into a wooded and area creek behind the subdivision." I hope you have good homeowner's insurance, because this is going to take tens of thousands of dollars to clean up!!!" Me: "OH $--T!!

I tried to explain to them that I, as a firefighter years ago, was taught that standard practice following an auto accident, was to flush away gas and oil, and I relayed the words of a past chemistry teacher" The solution to pollution- is dilution" Right? WRONG! The NEW solution is CONTAINMENT!

By now, the gas tank was empty, My status as a well liked new neighbor was spent, and I was in trouble with the federal government. I plead ignorance and good intentions, based on my prior training.

The sewer and creek? Yellow containment booms, just like you see in the oceans. Soil scraped and removed, This stuff couldn't be put out to the trash, but needed a special truck to treat, burn and recycle the materials. Me? Well, let's say I kept a low profile for awhile....

I can look back and uneasily chuckle about it now, but at the time it was more worrisome, than funny.

05/17/2012 new
Okay so for anyone who lives in the country you would know that there is a deer season & that people enjoy hunting. This happened when Andrew was around 10-12 I think. So Andrew & his cousin Mandy both have walkie talkies that they enjoy talking on (pre cell phone days for my son). Andrew is in his room doing homework(or so I thought) and I am in my room playing on the computer when the knock at the door happened. It is around dusk, and it is the game warden.... eyepopping Evidentally Andrew & Mandy thought it would be funny to do this whole thing over the walkie talkie & pretend like they had just got a deer & asking someone to come to their location. I have no clue how the Game Warden traced the conversation back to my house but he did. Thank Goodness he believed that my son & his cousin were in two different houses & no we had not been hunting that night. After they left my house they went to my cousins house & explained to her how serious it could have been had they actually been hunting without a license & that even though we were out in the middle of nowhere someone might be listening to their talking on the walkie talkies..... scratchchin scratchchin
05/17/2012 new

(Quote) Brenda-74660 said: Okay so for anyone who lives in the country you would know that there is a deer season & that people...
(Quote) Brenda-74660 said: Okay so for anyone who lives in the country you would know that there is a deer season & that people enjoy hunting. ...
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www.foxcreekphoto.com

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