This room is for supportive and informative discussion about divorce and/or the annulment process. All posters must have been previously divorced or annulled.
Saint Eugene De Mazenod is patron of dysfunctional families & Saint Fabiola obtained a divorce from her first husband prior to devoting her life to charitable works.
Learn More: Saint Eugene De Mazenod and Saint Fabiola
I had no mixed emotions by the time the annulment came. It was relief for a mistake I made more than a decade earlier. Now I am looking forward to moving forward with just one right relationship...
So the highly anticipated letter from the Archdiocese arrived today, and I read that the Judicial Vicar “is pleased to inform [me] that [my] marriage to [my former spouse] has been declared invalid.” (Wording that I did find a bit odd, but I’ll save that for another thread).
My first reaction was to immediately say a prayer of gratitude as this was a Ligamen (Prior Bond) submission, which, in my archdiocese, requires responses form the respondent, witnesses, and the respondent’s former spouse(!?), all of whom, praise God, obviously did their part.
Anyway, my second reaction was to open a help ticket with CM to get my marital status updated on my profile. Okay, so far, so good.
Now, my third reaction, and one that was entirely unexpected, was to experience a sudden wave of sadness that I had not at all anticipated, especially after having gone through the entire annulment process over the past three months or so, leaving lots of time to come to terms with it all.
How about the rest of you “annullees (I think I just invented a word)?” Did you, too, experience a tinge or more of sadness once “the letter” was received, or were you jumping for joy, or was it something in between?
I would have to say that I had feelings of saddness... The annullment process for myself was one of discovery... Discovery of my failings during the marriage and my ex spouses... I just couldnt find any joy in those things...
the annulment process is one of the man made rules. I am not good with following man made rules. You know, the priest in my former parish took care of it for anyone who wanted it then the worry was off of them for the rest of the time. This priest also would say to the congregation anyone who is in here is welcome to come to communion. He also included protestants.when my cousin who is Methodist was visiting us, she went to commuion with us. this is off the subject but I'm making the point that the annulment doesn't have to take so long and be denied for you. Isn't there a fee attached as well? this whole thing reminds me of the Catholic community that was built in FL. would you move there, just wondering. I wouldn't because I enjoy living with a variety of faiths.
I think my father said it best when he said, "It doesn't seem right to congratulate you, but I hope you're relieved." I am, but it was very sad for me. I take heart in the fact that it helped move me through the grieving process.
The gift is in receiving back the opportunity to make a sacramental vow in the future and maintain our ideal of marriage as one union in this lifetime in God. The gift is the graces we receive from a loving God.
As my former husband and I separated and divorced, which I only did after all options had been exhausted and even the monsignor who married us indicated I had a valid case for an annulment, I was very clear that I had graces working for me. And I know my former husband didn't. God cared for me because I had made a vow with a sincere heart, intended for life. My former husband hadn't.
If this sounds at all familiar, take heart that your love of the LORD is true, and He will continue to bless and keep you. And hold you close in that sadness--yes, I felt it very profoundly, too.