Anyone whose read my posts knows my parish priest has been cruel and nasty to me so obviously I'm not discussing anything with him. I'm changing parishes but not fully changed over yet. I don't need a parish priest to tell me what my children will do after I die. They are doing what I told them to do: immediate cremation, funeral mass, and sprinkle me over my son's grave.
It's about honoring his wishes and I don't see someone who wasn't in the faith as being required to go against their wishes. I'm being scattered after death so that's why I feel strongly about honoring people's last wishes. But...since this is a woman whose husband has died arguing seems inconsiderate.
I will say to the OP: Follow YOUR heart. If you truly believe he WANTED to be scattered, don't ask for advice, just go do it. If you're not sure what he wanted, then by all means talk to someone who knew him and loved him not strangers who have no understanding of what made him the man you loved. Words out of a book cannot always explain the complexities or realities of every situation. My thoughts and prayers are with you. I'm very sorry this turned into a disagreement but at least you had a view different viewpoints. My heart is sad for you and I pray you will do what you feel he would truly want, because in the end, all that matters is the love you had together. He will always be with you in that way. Blessings to you and my deepest compassion in your loss.--God bless you and welcome home to the Church.
What you said about following your heart goes back to my previous comment about basing one's actions on emotions rather than thinking them through. Emotions are great gifts -- if used properly -- and they certainly do a great deal to enhance our lives. However, emotions can also cause us a great deal of trouble and pain. As an example, we can look at marriages that were based more upon emotions than serious thinking. Balance between the two is the key.
Here's a silly question to help you understand my point. It's extreme, but not meant to be facetious. If a person's wishes included having his/her body dumped from a plane over a WalMart store, would you still back up that decision?
Getting back to discussing this with a priest, it doesn't have to be one from your parish, especially if you two have had disagreements. There are others to talk about this and other spiritual matters. I'm sure you can easily find one who would be more than willing to listen to you.