Tonight is another one of "those nights" . My life consists of getting ready for work, working, eating dinner, watching TV and answering email, sleeping and repeat ad infinitum. That's it. I go to Mass on Saturday afternoon and the rest of my weekend is lying around.
The loneliness is horrible--I sleep very little and I'm relieved when it's time to get up so I don't have to lay there anymore and think about how I'm all alone. Sometimes I roll over and go to throw my arm around someone --and he's not there so my arm hits the bed, I startle awake and then cry. I hate nighttime. My friends are all married so they have families and I am feeling like the only person who lives alone on the entire planet. --I'd laugh at tha but I'm bummed.
How do you get out of the loneliness. Sadly I'm financially strapped so I really don't have $$ to go out. I'm just needing to adjust my attitude but not sure how. I'm sick of crying and feeling cruddy. Being alone isn't always bad, I just sink into this loneliness, heck I talk to the characters on TV...no one to laugh or chat with. I am glad I stopped drinking because that was going nowhere...but what helps you when loneliness creeps in?
I struggle with EXACTLY the same kind of thing it sounds like you're dealing with. And I am a rotating shift worker, so my days off are NEVER consistent. Attending routine gatherings such as running events (races and group runs), church activities (That Man Is You, Knights of Columbus, and CRHP) is tough to do due to scheduling issues with work. Attending events where single Catholic ladies are present is nearly impossible. And this is not likely to change soon, as weather does not sleep. A weather forecaster's life isn't easy.
I hug my pillow some nights. It isn't the same, but I have a good imagination. I imagine cuddling with the perfect mate (for me) there, and talking to her, and just enjoying her company in my mind as I reflect on the kind of person she will be and pray for the day I meet her. I already know who she is, in my mind's eye. And I pray for her, too.
So, that gets me through most nights tear-free. Yes, the pain of loneliness is just terrible. I try to turn things around and put an optimistic spin on things... not always successful.
During the days I have available, I attend mass. On weekends that are free--VERY RARE--I go run with the group and talk to the ladies, and otherwise try to put myself in places where single women might be. I haven't gotten too good at that yet, here in this new place where I moved earlier this year due to work.
Visiting the place I used to live, to see friends there, is a BIG way I overcome loneliness. I am blessed to have found a civilian job across the state from where I first came into the Catholic church during the final days of my military career, and built so many wonderful relationships that have endured. Old friendships have been a big help, as my friends also have some pretty good insights that are helping me to become a better man for a future wife, children, and the Church.
Finally, when things get rough, my priest is always available to talk. He is simply amazing in his ability to offer insights and get right down to the root of my concerns.
Are your work hours flexible enough to permit participation in some sort of church group(s)?