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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
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01/22/2013 new

This as always been a little fantasy of mine ;) I've had women approach me in public in ways that let me know they where interested, I've even had women buy be a drink, but never had actually ask me out.

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01/22/2013 new

(Quote) John-666618 said: Absolutely not. Particularly with online dating. There is no way to read body language or ...
(Quote) John-666618 said:



Absolutely not. Particularly with online dating. There is no way to read body language or see her interact with others here. OK, there are some people here who can give you the sense that you do NOT want to be around them, and a few that you would really like to get to know, even if it is just as a friend. But it is difficult to discern subtleties and casual interest from a profile picture and a few posts.

If a woman asks me out for coffee, it is a starting point that may or may not go anywhere, but as I have said before, at least we'll have a nice afternoon/evening. And there is no doubt that I will pay, not just offer to pay. It is what gentlemen do.

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I gave the last woman I dated the stink eye crazy for insisting on buying me desert since I would not let her pay for dinner. She learned quickly mischievous

Also she is a wonderful young woman, just I'm old fashioned and don't think a woman should pay for anything.

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01/22/2013 new

(Quote) Kristen-878108 said: Wow! I was pretty surprised by the overwhelming positivity from men about women asking them out...
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:

Wow! I was pretty surprised by the overwhelming positivity from men about women asking them out until this one. And your message makes sense too. Although it seems like many men DO take it personally when they are rebuffed - at least that's what they're saying in these forums. I guess it depends on the person. I will probably not begin asking men out. I'm just not comfortable with it - it feels wrong.

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As far as taking it personally when we're rebuffed, I don't know. I think that would clearly depend on the circumstances. (A rejection on an online site like this is not a real rejection.)

I know enough stories of men being rebuffed and then getting a date in the long run, or of even marrying a woman who initially brushed them off.

As I said, if a woman asks a guy out, it turns the whole dating thing upside down. A woman can gracefully decline; it would be too hard for a man to do, and I think the result would only be trouble down the road.

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01/22/2013 new

(Quote) Andrea-368827 said: (I thought of making a new thread so I could reply, "Women, what do you think about asking ...
(Quote) Andrea-368827 said:

(I thought of making a new thread so I could reply, "Women, what do you think about asking Men out?" But it would be boring without the men.)

Meeting a man in real life is an honor and a pleasure and it is so much easier to talk in person.

Basically, these are more like greetings and not technically dates.

How is either person truly going to know if they match the other until they meet in real life? That's when dating begins and the man can ask.

So, women that wouldn't ask a man on a date - I would suggest you are not asking them on a date, you are asking to meet in real life.

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Agreed.

A woman asking to meet someone she comes across on this site is not asking a man on a date; she only wants to meet him in person.

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01/22/2013 new

(Quote) Kristen-878108 said: Wow! I was pretty surprised by the overwhelming positivity from men about women asking them...
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:


Wow! I was pretty surprised by the overwhelming positivity from men about women asking them out until this one. And your message makes sense too. Although it seems like many men DO take it personally when they are rebuffed - at least that's what they're saying in these forums. I guess it depends on the person. I will probably not begin asking men out. I'm just not comfortable with it - it feels wrong.

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Kristen,

Please see my response to Andrea.

If you come across someone on this site you want to meet, by all means try to meet him for a cup of coffee. This would not be a date, and it is certainly "allowed" by the rule books.

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01/23/2013 new

(Quote) William-607613 said: As I said, if a woman asks a guy out, it turns the whole dating thing upside down. A woman can ...
(Quote) William-607613 said:

As I said, if a woman asks a guy out, it turns the whole dating thing upside down. A woman can gracefully decline; it would be too hard for a man to do, and I think the result would only be trouble down the road.

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I don't know, William. The guys I asked out in college must have been made of sterner stuff- they somehow found the strength to say no to me. laughing


I don't do the asking out anymore. I prefer to just give enough positive signs to make it abundantly clear that WHEN they ask me, the answer will be yes. Battling eyelashes

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01/23/2013 new

I absolutely love it when a woman asks me out. It's extremely flattering and delightfully refreshing, especially since we men are typically expected to make the first move.

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01/23/2013 new

Call me old fashioned, but I would never ask a guy out. My reasoning is if I give them enough signs that I am interested and they don't ask me out, one, they are not interested, or two, they just don't have a clue which would be sort of a red flag for me laughing laughing


Men need to do the asking and woman need to do the obliging. I give men enough clues to know I'm interested. They need to make the first move always. If they don't make the first move and everything seems like it is going well, I would feel they are spineless and/or clueless and that is not a character anyone needs. I have never asked a guy out but have dropped enough hankies for them to know which works out well for both. LOL.

It just seems too backwards for me.

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01/24/2013 new

I have never asked a man out and I never will (to the chagrin of my girlfriends). I know, my views are not modern, but I was taught that men go after what they want. Women, on the other hand, should be gracious and recognize the efforts than men make to ask them out.

To paraphrase something I read on Boundless the other day, a man initiating a relationship is such a small fraction of the leadership role that he will take on as a husband and father, so if he can't/won't/refuses to ask a woman out and actually prefers to have women ask him out, it's quite telling.

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01/24/2013 new

(Quote) Claudine-882177 said: I have never asked a man out and I never will (to the chagrin of my girlfriends). I know, my v...
(Quote) Claudine-882177 said:

I have never asked a man out and I never will (to the chagrin of my girlfriends). I know, my views are not modern, but I was taught that men go after what they want. Women, on the other hand, should be gracious and recognize the efforts than men make to ask them out.

To paraphrase something I read on Boundless the other day, a man initiating a relationship is such a small fraction of the leadership role that he will take on as a husband and father, so if he can't/won't/refuses to ask a woman out and actually prefers to have women ask him out, it's quite telling.

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Could not have said it better. clap

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