Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.
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Either way is fine. If a woman asks, I don't see anything wrong with it. The more casual the get-together is, the less awkward it would be if someone were opposed to this. Your example of stopping in somewhere for coffee is innocent enough so as not to imply a burning interest, even if that would be the case. Conversation during this gathering can lead somewhere -- or not, depending upon how each of you is impressed with one another.
Rejection might be forthcoming, but it may not have anything to do with you. There could be other valid reasons for turning you down, so you wouldn't have to take a "no" personally.
To sum it up: Go for it!!!
Ray has it right, an informal get together is going to seem less awkward than a formal date. The internet dating model is the coffee shop meet. But face to face one could perhaps make the whole thing more subtle, ask him to help you with something, without explicity saying that that you have a burning interest in him.
Also true that rejection can happen for dozens of reasons, many of which may have nothing to do with you at all.
Nothing wrong with it at all, if anything helps just make the whole process a bit easier for the dude. Having said that, last couple of years asking out girls has gotten a lot easier to the point where it's almost like bringing home the milk --- that comes from being in a good place mentally I think and comfortable with yourself irrespective of what the result may be.
Yes, it's okay.However,she better also be prepared to get rejections too.Lot's of rejections! We men are used to that.
If a women makes the initial contact or asks a man out, do men think that woman is desperate?
No, I don't see it as desperate, I just see that the woman is more forward, less of a shrinking violet. Some men might like that, some might not.
I would not be in a big hurry to conclude that anyone was desperate, that would be something demonstrated over time.
It should really go both ways. Thats goes with starting contact & asking out. Somebody has to make the first move, it really does not matter who. The last CM gent I dated from here I aksed out for coffee. We dated close to a year. So dont be afraid to make the move. There will be no's but that happens. Dont get discouraged with that.
This is a topic I've always been curious about and this seems like a pretty appropriate venue for this question:
Men, how would you feel if a woman came up to you and asked you out (assuming she was clearly not crazy and was doing so politely)?
Would you be aggravated that you couldn't beat her to punch? Would you feel awkward if you weren't interested?
As for me, I have no problem asking a guy out. If I like someone and there are indications he likes me, I'll just be straightforward and ask him if he would like to go grab some coffee. I don't like prolonged flirting or waiting around for him (I don't play games, in other words). My first serious relationship actually started by me asking him out, so I know it does work. I now have a better appreciation when a guy has the courage to ask me out. I think since I've gone through it, I'm much more caring and gentle about turning him down if I'm not interested because I know how nervewracking it is :)
I'm just curious what you all might think. I've heard many contrasting theories.
I promise I won't judge! Please be honest.
First of all, Rachel, welcome to the forums! You'll meet some really nice people here.
To get to your questions, though, I've been asked out by ladies a couple of times, and I must admit that it's very flattering. Luckily, each time I was at least a little bit interested in the lady as well, so it worked out well.
I might feel a bit uncomfortable if I wasn't interested, but I would admire the lady for taking the chance to ask (since as guys we understand the courage it takes to ask) and would find a gentle way to say no.
And no, I wouldn't be aggravated that I didn't "beat her to the punch" as you say. Sometimes someone is interested in you but you miss the signs or the signs are very difficult to read, so I'm happy if a lady asks. The end result (going out on a date with the lady) is more important to me than the process (who asks whom out), I guess. I don't care who does the asking.
As for another question I saw later in the thread, I don't consider ladies who ask guys out to be over-aggressive at all. Sometimes a guy who has been rejected a bunch will be a little gun-shy about asking a lady out. So if you're interested in a guy and he seems interested but isn't asking, you might be helping him out by asking him.
Good luck, Rachel, and most importantly, be yourself. God bless.