Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.
Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael
I find it interesting that not a single woman has posted yet that she didn't want this overall picture.
So, guys, add that data to your study about "women don't want men who act this way."
You will not find a more self sufficient woman than me--I have "made it" in "a man's world" of law, am a trial lawyer, run a large law practice, in the big city of Chicago, and this is EXACTLY the kind of action I would welcome from a good Catholic man.
So I would say don't assume that "modern" women don't want this, or do so to your own detriment.
Thank you Pat for posting the article and telling it like it is. I can't tell you how many times I wished a gentleman would call, invite me somewhere, and treat me as the article describes a gentleman should treat a lady. Good manners never go out of style, and a lady will always appreciate a gentleman.
Yes, we live in the modern world where more women are reaching into careers that used to be almost exclusively male. There are a lot of men, fathers of young women, who are pushing their daughters to study hard, develop their talents and find a solid career, so that they can support themselves and not be economically dependent on certain types of men who would treat them poorly. (And before there's an uproar, I am not talking about blue collar vs. white collar. Wealthy businessmen are just as capable of treating women poorly as anyone else. Being a jerk is not restricted to socio-economic class.)
A father wants the best for his daughter. A gentleman suitor should not have a problem with that. Just my
There are some issues with the article I'd like to take accept ion to.
You ask which movie she would like to see, or which activity she might enjoy. Put some thought into the options. They need not be expensive.
I can NEVER get a woman to tell me what she wants to see or where she wants to eat. Now, if I choose incorrectly she will TELL me she didn't like it. I've concluded that to have a successful date, I need to be clairvoyant. Define expensive. My experience is the first date better be expensive or there probably won't be a second. She wants to know if you can afford her.
You do not pry into her private matters or ask intimate questions prematurely. For example, you do not ask, "Who did you vote for in the last election?" "Are you a Democrat or Republican?" "How much did that cost?", "Are your parents divorced?" or anything that might make her feel uncomfortable or that is none of your business at this early stage of courtship.
What?? This is exactly what I want to know BEFORE I ask her out. If she voted for Obama, we just ain't gonna cut it. Sorry. And, if she is divorced, it is nice to know if she is in the process of getting an annulment. I mean really, it is even listed on our profiles here.
Look for a woman who isn't high maintenance.
If you date spoiled, demanding girls, chances are you will marry one. If you marry a spoiled, demanding girl, you will inherit her father's problems. Spoiled, demanding girls can be very cute, but they increase headaches and can lead to years of heartache and misery. Choose a girl who will 'go with the flow' and has an appreciation for things in life.
Great advice if you can find a low maintenance woman. On one hand, this is kind of misogynistic. To be a good gentleman, we are now rating women. Of course, every woman has seen the movie "When Harry Met Sally." The thing about high maintenance women is that they don't think they are high maintenance. I've never known a woman to "go along with the flow." Actually, if I am going along with the flow, she HAS to instruct what I'm doing wrong.
I hope every woman who reads this accepts this humor in which it was given. If not, you must be high mainenance.
I like this one. Good post Bernie!
Sometimes, if we pull into a gas station, I even make a slight (barely perceptible) move toward the door as if I am going to get out and pump the gas. And, of course, after she's finished filling the tank I give her a short "well done!" grunt and then open another beer.
Chivalry is not dead!
ha ha,... I must be living in the wrong part of the country!!
Dad's Tips for getting the guy?
I've asked my dad how to get a man and he said men are simple and not to be clingy early on.
Well, Dawn, if he's a real gentleman, he'll be asking you, first, what you would like .... a gentleman doesn't assume, nor does he force his way by ordering something for you that you possibly would not enjoy. Real men, real gentlemen, know their boundaries, their limits, and they abide by them.
I find nothing wrong with his ordering for me ... I find it rather endearing, but that's just me
Matt Thank you for your comments on this article and in general here. It helps a lot to read your positive outlook and comments.
Aw shucks ... Thanks Marian. It's the result of a lot of learning the hard way, and only recently learning the easy way! (you know, actually listening to God!)
"God keeps hitting me with a 2x4, but I never listen."
"Are you sure he is hitting you with it, or do you keep walking into it on your own?"