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This room is for supportive and informative discussion about divorce and/or the annulment process. All posters must have been previously divorced or annulled.

Saint Eugene De Mazenod is patron of dysfunctional families & Saint Fabiola obtained a divorce from her first husband prior to devoting her life to charitable works.
Learn More: Saint Eugene De Mazenod and Saint Fabiola

Aug 8th 2012 new

(Quote) AnneMarie-641597 said: I very much appreciate all the feedback I've gotten here. I'm waiting for my tribunal...
(Quote) AnneMarie-641597 said:

I very much appreciate all the feedback I've gotten here. I'm waiting for my tribunal rep to get back to set up an appointment with her. I have to say that it is really nice to know that others have struggled with this. I can say that I have felt God at work in the process; when I started, when I have stalled, and when it was time to start again. The journey has been amazing though, and the people that God has blessed me with to walk it are incredible. Thank you all.

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Anne Marie my heart goes out to you! I so appreciate your honesty in sharing your difficulties with your personal process. I was married in my mid-20s for three years and my annulment was granted due to lack of form (he was non-baptized, we were married by a JP under a tree, young and foolish, etc.), so it was an easy process for me, but I've certainly had other areas in my life I did not want to face! I very much relate to the dragging of the feet... Your courage gives me courage, and I'll pray for you as you push through. hug We shall overcome, Jesus is always victorious and the Church is our merciful Mother. heart

Aug 8th 2012 new

Okay, I'm going to take the plunge and post. I've been a reader for a few weeks and have found the forums very encouraging and helpful. I'm in the midst of writing my annullment papers almost 20 years after the divorce. Talk about dragging one's feet.... that may be some kind of record. I'm about half way through and have just hit a wall. It makes me sick to my stomach to try to remember and revisit things. I've kind of set myself a deadline of getting it finished before I return to fulltime school in two weeks. Help! Any suggestions on how to stay focused and knock this thing out?

Aug 9th 2012 new
(Quote) Virginia-851921 said: Okay, I'm going to take the plunge and post. I've been a reader for a few weeks and have found the ...
(Quote) Virginia-851921 said:

Okay, I'm going to take the plunge and post. I've been a reader for a few weeks and have found the forums very encouraging and helpful. I'm in the midst of writing my annullment papers almost 20 years after the divorce. Talk about dragging one's feet.... that may be some kind of record. I'm about half way through and have just hit a wall. It makes me sick to my stomach to try to remember and revisit things. I've kind of set myself a deadline of getting it finished before I return to fulltime school in two weeks. Help! Any suggestions on how to stay focused and knock this thing out?

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Welcome to the forums!

As for the annulment papers, it took me three years of writing, putting away the papers, crying, picking up the papers, praying, until finally one day I was satisfied I explained my side of my story well enough to submit them....make sure you copy everything for yourself before you turn it in....hope this helps. Praying crossfingers
Aug 9th 2012 new

I guess my experience with the nullity process was very different. I was not Catholic when I married nor when I sought annulments. I came into full communion with the Catholic Church after my two divorces. It was very important to me to know if I was free to marry and have that established. My second marriage lacked form. There were other grounds for the first one. I have been single again for 11 years and the only person who "cares" that I have annulments other than the church is me. I guess I am not the type to drag my feet on most anything so it is not my perspective. I would say, however, that in North Carolina it is common for the parish to pay for the annulment fee for persons who need help with it ( no documents needed to show income ) and people are especially encouraged to pursue annulments if they are in marriages that need convalidation. I actually had a two hour conversation today with my father ( who is not catholic) as to why annulments mattered. I hope each of you who have been dragging your feet pursue your annulments if you genuinely believe you did not have the ability to consent to a valid marriage, form, etc. I would ask the person who said her ex husband was pushing her to get annulment since she had the grounds or something like that, why doesn't he pursue it. Either party can pursue the annulment, regardless of which party(ies) lacked ability to form consent. Anyhow, hope this is useful in some way. Oh yeah, could someone explain to me how a lot of the men on here say I don't know under the free to marry section? I don't understand how a person doesn't know...thanks, Zan

Aug 9th 2012 new

AnneMarie, you truly are a blessing to me!!! I have been avoiding the office in my house, simply because the forms are there. To confront all that hurt is the last thing I want and yet I know it is the path laid out ahead of me. It's kind of like the times we put off going to confession but know how much grace God will give us when we do. I know in my heart and in my head that if I pray the rosary before I start, that Our Blessed Mother will help. I needed this forum post to give me the kick up the rear that I need. Thank you for posting it and to all those others who have been through it biggrin hug rosary

Aug 9th 2012 new

Yuck - not really. I've been muddling through it for a few years. I'm 17 years out. You're not alone. I need to finish it. I have asked someone to keep me company, but I bailed on it last weekend. I have a few days while my daughter is away. I'm going to try to finish. Best thing I can tell you is to go through, and answer as many questions as you can - skip the ones that make you queasy. Then sit with your tribunal rep, priest, whoever to help you formulate answers to the harder ones. That's what I've been doing. You will be in our prayers. heart

Aug 9th 2012 new

**Update...truth is stranger than fiction, and God gives us what we need when we are ready to receive it. I had lost touch with my old neighbors, who were the two best witnesses I have for the annulment. They showed up today on Facebook - thrilled to see me. God takes very good care of us when we take the 'next right step.' heart

Aug 15th 2012 new

Hi Anne Marie

I think you just hit the nail on the head regarding dragging your feet in the annullement process. I just had my marriage declared void/annulled on june 19th of this year - thank God.
The whole process has taken 3 years. It took me one year just to fill out the application. I think it's because of the necessity to go over all the past situation concerning your relationship from the start, through the most painful bit, and through to the finish.
Another reason - speaking for me personally - was, that I had really no purpose in starting an annullement process. I was/am not ready to start over. What about the children ( I have 2 - a girl of 16 and a boy of 12)?
I finally decided on going ahead mainly to gain the psychological freedom of not "belonging" in a marriage which was not wanted.

Now that my marriage is declared void, I'm just looking for the will of God. I joined this site out of curiousity more than anything else.

Aug 15th 2012 new

(Quote) Jon-374680 said: Hi Anne MarieI think you just hit the nail on the head regarding dragging your feet in the ...
(Quote) Jon-374680 said:

Hi Anne Marie

I think you just hit the nail on the head regarding dragging your feet in the annullement process. I just had my marriage declared void/annulled on june 19th of this year - thank God.
The whole process has taken 3 years. It took me one year just to fill out the application. I think it's because of the necessity to go over all the past situation concerning your relationship from the start, through the most painful bit, and through to the finish.
Another reason - speaking for me personally - was, that I had really no purpose in starting an annullement process. I was/am not ready to start over. What about the children ( I have 2 - a girl of 16 and a boy of 12)?
I finally decided on going ahead mainly to gain the psychological freedom of not "belonging" in a marriage which was not wanted.

Now that my marriage is declared void, I'm just looking for the will of God. I joined this site out of curiousity more than anything else.

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First Post Alert & Welcome Jon!!! Funny, shortly after I posted this, I realized that God has been pushing me from every side to get it finished. I have an appointment this Saturday with my tribunal rep. I'm lucky that my daughter wasn't part of the issue at all. It's been an eventful year all the way around.

Awesome to have you with us. I've only been here a few months, but the people are nice and conversations are interesting and varied enough that you should find something that will interest you. I look forward to hearing more from you! heart

Sep 22nd 2012 new

Anne Marie, you really have been an inspiration!! I completed my paperwork the other week and went to visit the Canon locally to discuss my paperwork. This resulted in him physically taking my paperwork from me as he was visiting the Tribunal office on Thursday. I may have been procrastinating but I wasn't expecting God to physically step in and take it completely out of my hands like that!!!! This morning in the post I received the acknowledgement letter from the Diocese saying that they are progressing with preparing my petition. Praise God!! And THANK YOU for talking about it and helping me through your witness :) hug rosary rose

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