I've never felt it was appropriate for me to be friends with my ex-husband. We have both remarried and I lost our 3 children in miscarriage so we didn't need to be in contact. The forgiveness issue wasn't the reason for my feeling friendship with my ex was inappropriate, I just thought it was weird and not something that fit well with me.
I do know someone else in particular who got divorced and they both remarried. They happen to be friends for the kids' sake but they don't spend holidays together or hang out as couples. They see each other at baseball games or school events and give each other a hug. It seems to work well.
There are probably a lot of different scenarios out there but I think if you like the guy, give it a chance but keep your eyes open. It might prove to be a good match for you or you may see right off the bat that it's a situation you don't want to deal with.
- Lisa Duffy