(Quote) Linda-756196 said:
I can tell you the exact day--June 25th, less than two months after my husband was assassinated. ...
(Quote) Linda-756196 said:
I can tell you the exact day--June 25th, less than two months after my husband was assassinated. I had just received the autopsy pictures and report. I didn't intend to look at the pictures, but the words did not match what the military had told me about my Phil's death. I looked at the pictures and totally broke. I have never been there since or even before. Looking at my husband's bullet-riddled body crushed me. I ran to bed and threw the covers over my head. I have never done that since. I lay weeping and totally broken. I asked God why Phil and why not me. I had nothing to live for. I begged him to take me that very minute. I felt an electric jolt and saw me standing with a man at an altar in front of a priest. I cried on and thought that I was losing it. I felt a bigger jolt and saw the same picture. I was terrified. I jumped out of bed and tripped in the blankets. As I lay on the floor, I looked up. I saw the first double rainbow I had ever seen. Peace flooded my heart.
I can't say that the road has been easy, but I can say that I have never felt that darkness since. I have and I still do believe that all is well with my soul. I will never understand the brutality or the total betrayal, but I can see the hand of God working. I have also never had anything like that happen since.
Earlier this year. My husband died a little over 2 years ago now and circumstances and a wish to start a new life started nagging at me early this year. I moved from Denver (where I lived for 40 years) to a smaller, beautiful city, North of the state. I moved to Fort Collins, near the Wyoming border. I had this feeling that God was telling is was time to move on and begin doing something else--start the next chapter of my life -- I also knew that my husband was OK with it. He told me that too before he died. Frankly, the resistance I got came, unexpectedly from my 2 grown children, both of whom adored their dad and they felt "betrayed" and did not want anybody to take his place. But I told them I had done the things that I needed to do, had a good, long marriage with their dad and loved him very much, but I also did what I promised when we got married, and that was to stay "'till death do you part" and I still feel young, energetic and need to have someone else to share my life with. They both have come around too and I think they'll be OK with it now, if I were to find another wonderful man to share my life with. I would very much like that, and I know that God is looking down at me and telling me it's OK now.