Faith Focused Dating. Create your Free Profile and meet your Match! Sign Up for Free
A place to learn, mingle, and share

Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Dec 6th 2012 new

I have an advantage? How do I take advantage of that? biggrin

Dec 6th 2012 new

I have recognized my life mirrored in others who have posted already; I will add something new. I am the only boy of three and the youngest. However, my youngest sister is 3 and a half years older than me. I feel I do have first-born tendencies such as protector and guide, some have asked if I was the oldest, and the youngest traits too such as lesser responsibilty of others. But since I am the youngest by a few years I had greater expectations to learn and do things on my own and do so quickly. That instilled in me the patience to teach others and grow a deep empathy with others...maybe that is why I like ballroom dancing and math so much...to teach others through patience and understanding.

My father is the oldest of four boys, and my mother is the youngest of four and the only daughter of a mom with 10 sibilings, which the mom was one of the oldest. I feel those truths instill much in me too.

The comment that is new is that I a desire to pamper a woman, which comes from being the youngest AND realizing that the oldest in the family wants to relax. That is right; whoever gets to date/marry me will be pampered. Now not all the time; I will challenge and lead her and pick the best moments for the pampering. I can switch readly from my oldest traits such as leader to the youngest such as counselor. We will get dirty planting a garden, sweaty during a run, and muddy at the camp grounds. I have read in those books that the oldest is likely to be pampered. So, I do read in profiles where she falls in her family. I have experienced better relationships with the oldest than the youngest in the family.

Dec 6th 2012 new

I'm second of five: three sisters and a baby brother! I don't know that birth order has much to do with my older sister and I because we almost always shared the responsibility of being older. There's a large age gap between us and the younger three so I can see how that makes a difference. I don't know about anyone else, but I'm think what your name is affects your personality as well. That is quite fascinating as well... biggrin

Dec 6th 2012 new

(Quote) Jenny-872030 said: Today at work one of my students was telling me about "The Birth Order Book" and "...
(Quote) Jenny-872030 said:

Today at work one of my students was telling me about "The Birth Order Book" and "The Firstborn Advantage" by Dr. Kevin Leman. Apparently, your place in the line up of children in your family can say a lot about who you are; your personality and maturity level. I love reading this kind of stuff, so I immediately requested both of the books through interlibrary loan. I'm excited for them to arrive so I can read them!

So, where are you in your family? How many siblings do you have, and how many boys and girls? Do you think your birth order affected the person you are today?

I'll start! I'm the oldest. I have two younger brothers (23 and 13) and five younger sisters (20, 18, 16, 11, and 7). And yes, I think being the oldest forced me to step out of my comfort zone more than any of my siblings have had to and as a result I think I've always been pretty mature for my age. I always had a lot of responsibility growing up, and I know my parents trusted me with things they don't even allow some of my siblings (who are much older than I was at the time) to handle.

--hide--



I would say that I am definitely a first-born. I'm the oldest and only. And I'm very bold, and outgoing, and also very visionary, with a great imagination. I had to entertain myself, I was a farm kid. I did have many, many cousins of similar age and was close. I've always been very mature and been comfortable around people that were older (significantly) than myself. I also know more history than anyone else on both sides of the family because I actually sat and listened when the older ones told stories. I am very confident. Onlys are called, by some, a "super" first-born, and I'd say its true. Very little has ever stopped me and my charisma seems to be very influential. This sounds like I'm bragging, but I only mean to elaborate.


That said, being a super extrovert when neither parent is especially so (mother was oldest of seven, father was three of eight---four boys and four girls, all in a row), it was lonely until I got a car and we moved into town. My second cousin once removed is actually my best friend (our families are not close enough to have done the reunion thing), and he was two years older in school. I'm kind of an extra member of their family (his dad was my coach). It is my belief, from observation, that many middles I've dated or befriended tend to be more passive or less opinionated people. He's a middle, his wife's a firstborn, and she and I are VERY much alike in personality, where he is laid back we will be responsive.

Dec 6th 2012 new

(Quote) Jenny-872030 said: I finally just finished reading the book! There are lots of little rules about swaps and exceptio...
(Quote) Jenny-872030 said:

I finally just finished reading the book! There are lots of little rules about swaps and exceptions. For example, a firstborn doesn't necessarily have to be the first born in the family. Sometimes a firstborn daughter or son (even if they are in fact the secondborn) can take on firstborn traits. In the case of twins, usually the one who is born first will have the traits of a firstborn. If there is a gap of five or more years between siblings, the younger one could still have firstborn traits. Lots of interesting info to glean from the book!

I'm definitely a firstborn, and interestingly enough, think I have some traits of an only child. This kind of surprised me, because I'm the oldest of 8, and we are all fairly close in age!

--hide--



Something to note----our high school class was made up primarily of oldests and onlys. There were 70 in it. Most of the class reunions around here have cohesive classes who want to see each other and are friends for life (like my best friend's wife, a graduate of a Topeka school, with 200 some in her class). We don't. When there were projects in school, there were too many chiefs and not enough indians. I have a few classmates I am friendly with, but for the most part, could take or leave them. I don't dislike them, I just mourned when the class my brother from another was in graduated; the class right above us was mean-spirited, partiers, etc. and just not great at all. I made friends quickly with people in the class below mine. Running homecoming our senior year was a challenge with lots of fights and drama, being in plays was lots of fights and drama, being in sports was lots of fights (off the field and when the coach was in the shower and couldn't hear) and drama. . .

Dec 6th 2012 new

(Quote) Jenny-872030 said: Today at work one of my students was telling me about "The Birth Order Book" and "...
(Quote) Jenny-872030 said:

Today at work one of my students was telling me about "The Birth Order Book" and "The Firstborn Advantage" by Dr. Kevin Leman. Apparently, your place in the line up of children in your family can say a lot about who you are; your personality and maturity level. I love reading this kind of stuff, so I immediately requested both of the books through interlibrary loan. I'm excited for them to arrive so I can read them!

So, where are you in your family? How many siblings do you have, and how many boys and girls? Do you think your birth order affected the person you are today?

I'll start! I'm the oldest. I have two younger brothers (23 and 13) and five younger sisters (20, 18, 16, 11, and 7). And yes, I think being the oldest forced me to step out of my comfort zone more than any of my siblings have had to and as a result I think I've always been pretty mature for my age. I always had a lot of responsibility growing up, and I know my parents trusted me with things they don't even allow some of my siblings (who are much older than I was at the time) to handle.

--hide--



Hello All!


I am the middle of 5 . The first two a boy and girl are very close in age and then there was a big break of like 12 yrs before me and my 2 younger siblings both girls. Lots of things affect your personality and experience growing up. The fact is your personality is fully developed by age 5! But expectations of maturity levels from parents, other Born's, family members and society as a whole helps to foster personal growth and train you into a role within family and society . Basically I do find that order of birth, time of birth and world climate (i.e, what was happening in the 1st 5 yrs of your life? Around the world, locally and your family) That all shapes who you are over time. What does this mean in the dating world? It can help figure out who might be more suitable to your personality and communication style.

Dec 7th 2012 new

(Quote) Andrea-883787 said: I'm second of five: three sisters and a baby brother! I don't know that birth order has ...
(Quote) Andrea-883787 said:

I'm second of five: three sisters and a baby brother! I don't know that birth order has much to do with my older sister and I because we almost always shared the responsibility of being older. There's a large age gap between us and the younger three so I can see how that makes a difference. I don't know about anyone else, but I'm think what your name is affects your personality as well. That is quite fascinating as well...

--hide--


I do not know much about how a name affects your personality. How does that work?

Dec 9th 2012 new

Hello Jenny and everyone,


I'm going to go at this from slightly different angle. To start with I'm smack dab in the middle of 3 brothers. I have middle child synrome, but in a different way than what might be expected. I come from a broken home in which chaos and yelling was the norm. Indeed silence was our noise. Furthermore my childhood was capitulated by episodes of physical abuse from both parents. Ironically enough I was also the diplomat referee to my parents when they fought, which increased in frequency as we grew older--I also caught the majority of the abuse. This was due in part to the fact that I would challenge what I perceived to be an unjust authority or rule in our household. When I was young I read many political philosophers and used their ideas to challenge unjust rule. I once stepped up to my father and stated that if he and mom could not feed us, then they have no authority over us. I caught hell for that, but what are you supposed to do if you have no food in the house? My older brother was ever the pacifist (still is) and chided my on my rebellion, saying that it would get all three brothers in trouble, but I wasn't asking for a trip to Disneyland, I was just asking for food and running water (we didn't have that at times).

But going back to my diplomat role, I had and have the keen ability to see both sides of an issue and help solve the problem/conflict that involved to parties. I remember going down stairs at night when my parents were fighting, despite my brothers' warnings. Sometimes all I could do is to tell my parents to at least keep it down. I would also tell them that we boys know they are fighting and gave them the choice of talking it out or letting us sleep. This often meant that I was risking physical injury for the audacity of trying to establish peace.


So there you have it, we are the peacemakers and revolutionaries of the world. Some famous middle children include Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. John F. Kennedy, and the Dalai Lama

Dec 9th 2012 new

(Quote) Jenny-872030 said: Oh my goodness, I am obsessed with MBTI! Haha...you don't even want to get me starte...
(Quote) Jenny-872030 said:

Oh my goodness, I am obsessed with MBTI! Haha...you don't even want to get me started on that! I created a thread on it a couple years ago. I have not heard of the book though, so thanks so much for the recommendation!

--hide--



I've taken the Myers-Briggs five times in my life at at different stages of my mental/emotional/physical development and consistenly scored INFJ. What was your score?

Dec 9th 2012 new

(Quote) Jenny-872030 said: Oh my goodness, I am obsessed with MBTI! Haha...you don't even want to get me starte...
(Quote) Jenny-872030 said:

Oh my goodness, I am obsessed with MBTI! Haha...you don't even want to get me started on that! I created a thread on it a couple years ago. I have not heard of the book though, so thanks so much for the recommendation!

--hide--



I've taken the Myers-Briggs five times in my life at at different stages of my mental/emotional/physical development and consistenly scored INFJ. What was your score?

Posts 31 - 40 of 42