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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Oct 12th 2012 new

Margaret, you are a gem, and your beauty is in your simplicity and common sense - comes from living in the country - CowGirl
(thanks for changing up the topic from the smelly stuff laughing )

Oct 12th 2012 new
There are dozens of gems on here. Im not real sure why there is not a lot more dating on here than there appears to be. Why in this thread alone there several beautiful ladies i would be proud to ask out for dinner and a movie!! Get to work guys!! Ask someone out!
Oct 12th 2012 new

(Quote) Clair-6292 said: (Quote) Ray-566531 said: (Quote) Julie-42315 said: 9 An Unba...
(Quote) Clair-6292 said:
Quote:
Ray-566531 said:

Quote:
Julie-42315 said:

9 An Unbalanced Focus on Career. I want to be established before I get married.


I don't think I agree. Even Dear Abby recommends being able to support yourself before you get married. If established means being steadily employed or certainly employable before you get married, I think that's very positive.


There really isn't much security in a job nowadays. Here one day--gone the next. I'm afraid if one is looking for security, it'll have to be found elsewhere. Actually, true security comes from within a person; not what the world offers (or retracts).



Established in a career? The meaning I take from it is that a person is well beyond the starting point, or climbing near the top of the corporate ladder, so to speak. It's much more than having a steady job. Others may interpret this differently, of course.




I'd add this also shows putting more trust in the created than the Creator. Isn't this called idolatry? The verse that talks about God providing for the birds of the air. How much more will God provide for you?

We need more focus on God!

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So well put Clair! clap knight-errant

Oct 12th 2012 new

I think that each of the 10 reasons fall into one of three categories- selfishness, fear or ignorance...

(Quote) Colleen-13855 said: You left out selfishness. So many people are focused on self rather than to love sacrificially.<...
(Quote) Colleen-13855 said:

You left out selfishness. So many people are focused on self rather than to love sacrificially.

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Oct 12th 2012 new

(Quote) Clair-6292 said: Pat, the list you gave seemed to show a lack of trust in God. I can understand why so many don't have ...
(Quote) Clair-6292 said: Pat, the list you gave seemed to show a lack of trust in God. I can understand why so many don't have trust in God because of the culture's efforts to remove God from the world. This lack of trust sends people in the wrong direction looking for the perfect mate.

JP II's Rgeology of the Body describes earthly marriage as the foreahadowing of the eternal marriage of God and His church. People are looking for perfection here instead of eternity. Through my life experiences I'd say the only one I saw myself in is how well does this lady understand God's role in the marriage?
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Sorry, but I see someone riding a high horse.

Oct 12th 2012 new
(Quote) Jim-624621 said: #10 is the biggest reason for me too, as someone who has been through the pain of divorce, and I know I will...
(Quote) Jim-624621 said:

#10 is the biggest reason for me too, as someone who has been through the pain of divorce, and I know I will never find the perfect mate (#7), but that doesn't mean I am going to lower my standards or settle by any far stretch of the imagination. I would rather be single for the rest of my life than marry someone that is not a good match for me. Settling is out of the question. I am not happy to be single either, but I am happier single than I was when I was "married". What's the old saying? Fool me once, shame on you; foll me twice, shame on me! I learn from my mistakes, and that makes stepping into it that much more difficult.



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Thankfully, I have fought this fear, and I have found a woman of virtue and beauty. I may have apprehensions, but no fears. Apprehensions, of course, being entirely of the logistical sort. LDR's aren't easy, but a match is a match.
Oct 12th 2012 new

(Quote) Patrick-872788 said: “I’d rather be alone than in a bad marriage.” I agree with th...
(Quote) Patrick-872788 said:

“I’d rather be alone than in a bad marriage.”

I agree with this one 100%. I don't get their problem with this.

“I’m not sure if I have a soul mate.”

I have always disagreed with the notion of a "soulmate". It creates a romanticized ideal no one can live up to. For some people there are thousands of people with whom they could have a fulfilling marriage, which negates the premise of a single soulmate. However others may not have someone who is right for them, or live in an area where there are few other singles. Maybe there isn't someone for everyone. Stereotyping singles and laying a guilt trip on them accomplishes nothing.

Some of these point are valid, and point to an overly strong orientation toward self or a lack of faith as hindrances to marriage. However the Catholic and Protestant clergy and lay people bemoaning the decline in Christian marriage need to take a long look in the mirror and ask: Are we creating an environment in which singles feel welcome and valued, or is our message geared entirely toward those married with families? Have we made an effort to introduce singles we believe would be compatible? Have I done what I can to help people along the path to marriage, or do I prefer to make them feel lacking and to blame for being single?

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Yeah, some months back, the was a Blog on Singles in the Church and they, Catholic Match, said sign-up and we'll send you a copy of the newly completed report on the single's crisis in the Catholic Church - CM or Bishops or whoever - WHERE IS THAT REPORT?

Oct 12th 2012 new
(Quote) Patrick-861636 said: Thankfully, I have fought this fear, and I have found a woman of virtue and beauty. I may have apprehen...
(Quote) Patrick-861636 said:

Thankfully, I have fought this fear, and I have found a woman of virtue and beauty. I may have apprehensions, but no fears. Apprehensions, of course, being entirely of the logistical sort. LDR's aren't easy, but a match is a match.
--hide--


I don't think being cautious is fear by any far stretch. Being cautious is wise, and wisdom does not create fear. It is the opposite. Wisdom and experience add confidence to your decision making. Of course there are feelings and thoughts involved, but you can't allow feelings to cloud sound judgment.

LDRs are indeed difficult, but if you can make it work, more power to you.
Oct 12th 2012 new

(Quote) Paul-850415 said: The divorce rate for subsequent marriages is higher than that for 1st time marriages, which does ...
(Quote) Paul-850415 said:

The divorce rate for subsequent marriages is higher than that for 1st time marriages, which does scare the heck out of me, but is not the reason why I've not remarried. Yet, such reality gets my attention in view of the fact that the the Great Recession completely wiped me out financially, leaving me to start completely over. At 51, who is going to hitch their wagon to that, and why would I want to hitch my wagon to another person before I'm prepared to take on the role of being able to provide for her, which is why I've returned to college to pursue a professional degree. I mean, if I had a daughter, I sure as heck would advise her against marrying a guy who was unable to provide for her, so I'm just taking my own advice. Am I sick of the loneliness? Of course, you bet. But it beats the heck out of the thought of being at high risk for a second divorce.
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I'm not afraid to put the finger on ONE BIG REASON - the FAILURE of the CATHOLIC CHURCH in regards to MARRIAGE. I'm not talking GOD here, I'm talking His representative in the world - the Institution of the Catholic Church.

The Catholic Church (Institution) here in the USA is a government controlled, through the IRC 501(c)(3) tax tranny, shell. It's too bad but that is the reality. Before anyone comes down on me about 501(c)(3), let it be known, I got the sheep skin from Univ of Florida in Federal Tax law.

Oct 12th 2012 new

They all have George Wa$hington$ picture$ on them.$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

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