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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

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I'm going to throw this question to the men and women of the forum because I can't seem to resolve it myself. It regards a couple of points that often come up in interviews: First, the question of whether a wife should work or stay at home to raise the children; and secondly, whether I would prefer to send my children to public school, private school, Catholic school, or have them homeschooled.

My problem is that I can't answer either question because I do not insist personally on any of the answers to either question. That is, in the first regard, I would leave my wife completely free to choose her own career path (which is often not listed as an answer choice); and for the second, it seems like a future matter that would need to be worked out between the two of us a point in the future, taking into consideration our circumstances at the time.

Thanks for any help you can provide. I'm kind of at a loss here.



God bless,


Matt

Oct 24th 2012 new

It sounds like a good conversation starter, Matthew. You can check any of the choices (making sure to note her preference if she puts it in her profile) and follow up with a message explaining what you said here. Good luck.

Oct 24th 2012 new

(Quote) Matthew-523856 said: I'm going to throw this question to the men and women of the forum because I can't seem...
(Quote) Matthew-523856 said:

I'm going to throw this question to the men and women of the forum because I can't seem to resolve it myself. It regards a couple of points that often come up in interviews: First, the question of whether a wife should work or stay at home to raise the children; and secondly, whether I would prefer to send my children to public school, private school, Catholic school, or have them homeschooled.

My problem is that I can't answer either question because I do not insist personally on any of the answers to either question. That is, in the first regard, I would leave my wife completely free to choose her own career path (which is often not listed as an answer choice); and for the second, it seems like a future matter that would need to be worked out between the two of us a point in the future, taking into consideration our circumstances at the time.

Thanks for any help you can provide. I'm kind of at a loss here.



God bless,


Matt



--hide--


Matt, I think you're doing the right thing by letting your wife decide what she wants to do. Personally, I feel that the CHILDREN do better when moms stay home, but there are many reasons why she and others may not want to do that. It's a personal choice. I think the stay at home mom is not appreciated as much as she should.


With regard to the education, it is also a very personal choice. It would seem that many of the people in this site went to Catholic school, I don't know. I have 16 years of Catholic education, as I attended a Jesuit college and I wouldn't change the education I received in Catholic schools for anything. I believe there is still a higher standard in Catholic schools, plus the religion education that comes along with being there. Public schools can be very good, or very bad, depending on where you live; I think the standards are lower. I'm not an advocate of home schooling for many reasons, which I will not go into right here, right now. Some private schools are great, if you can afford them, but I don't think they're any better than Catholic Schools. I know people that pay higher than college tuitions to send their kids to private schools and the kids aren't any better scholastically than the rest, but the parents like to brag about the fact that their kid(s) go to private schools. They are all very much personal choices; you'd have to take a good look at all the pros and cons of each one and decide what is best for you and your family. Sorry, that wasn't very much help.



Oct 24th 2012 new

(Quote) Matthew-523856 said: I'm going to throw this question to the men and women of the forum because I can't seem...
(Quote) Matthew-523856 said:

I'm going to throw this question to the men and women of the forum because I can't seem to resolve it myself. It regards a couple of points that often come up in interviews: First, the question of whether a wife should work or stay at home to raise the children; and secondly, whether I would prefer to send my children to public school, private school, Catholic school, or have them homeschooled.

My problem is that I can't answer either question because I do not insist personally on any of the answers to either question. That is, in the first regard, I would leave my wife completely free to choose her own career path (which is often not listed as an answer choice); and for the second, it seems like a future matter that would need to be worked out between the two of us a point in the future, taking into consideration our circumstances at the time.

Thanks for any help you can provide. I'm kind of at a loss here.



God bless,


Matt



--hide--


I think the most important thing is for you to respond honestly about how you feel about it. Women appreciate honesty from men.

Oct 24th 2012 new

(Quote) Matthew-523856 said: I'm going to throw this question to the men and women of the forum because I can't seem...
(Quote) Matthew-523856 said:

I'm going to throw this question to the men and women of the forum because I can't seem to resolve it myself. It regards a couple of points that often come up in interviews: First, the question of whether a wife should work or stay at home to raise the children; and secondly, whether I would prefer to send my children to public school, private school, Catholic school, or have them homeschooled.

My problem is that I can't answer either question because I do not insist personally on any of the answers to either question. That is, in the first regard, I would leave my wife completely free to choose her own career path (which is often not listed as an answer choice); and for the second, it seems like a future matter that would need to be worked out between the two of us a point in the future, taking into consideration our circumstances at the time.

Thanks for any help you can provide. I'm kind of at a loss here.



God bless,


Matt

--hide--


Just a thought here. If those are questions on someone's interview they are something that is important to them most likely. Answering them as close as you can to what you think/feel on that and then following up with a message is a good option I think, also a good conversation starter.

I have to say for myself I really enjoy working and don't know if I could handle being home with kids all day although I think that stay at home mom's are whats best for the kids, I do feel pressure if I talk to a guy who says being a stay at home mom is a requirement. I feel kind of like my choice is taken away. As far as schooling goes I can see where that can be important to a lot of people, probably something I would want to talk about before I tied the knot but I don't think it's something that needs to addressed like right now. . .

Oct 24th 2012 new

I understand the dilemma. I also am open to all schooling options and am not adamant in the abstract about any of those options. As a woman, I have a definite preference for what *I* would like to do concerning career/children, but I can see how awkward it would be to answer about what someone else should do.


Maybe the best thing is to answer what your ideal situation would be at the moment and send a message to the person telling them that your answer is not written in stone or that you couldn't find an answer to describe your flexibility. It's even possible that your message could lead to them adding an additional answer choice to cover your situation. Sometimes we don't realize we haven't covered all the bases when we make an interview question.

Oct 24th 2012 new

(Quote) Matthew-523856 said: I'm going to throw this question to the men and women of the forum because I can't seem...
(Quote) Matthew-523856 said:

I'm going to throw this question to the men and women of the forum because I can't seem to resolve it myself. It regards a couple of points that often come up in interviews: First, the question of whether a wife should work or stay at home to raise the children; and secondly, whether I would prefer to send my children to public school, private school, Catholic school, or have them homeschooled.

My problem is that I can't answer either question because I do not insist personally on any of the answers to either question. That is, in the first regard, I would leave my wife completely free to choose her own career path (which is often not listed as an answer choice); and for the second, it seems like a future matter that would need to be worked out between the two of us a point in the future, taking into consideration our circumstances at the time.

Thanks for any help you can provide. I'm kind of at a loss here.



God bless,


Matt

--hide--



Many of the questions people put in their interview don't always have a clear answer so that is where you can have an opportunity to write to the person and let them know how you feel.

Circumstances can be different for everyone. If you have a good job and your wife can stay at home that is ideal I believe for the children. And if the public school system in your district is not a good one, definitely Catholic Schools or homeschooling would be my choice.

Just keep turing your concerns to God, He will guide you. At this point it is a bit premature to be making those decisions so try asking the lady out for a date first. Come on Guys there are many of us waiting for a date.

God Bless you Matt and Welcome to CM forums. Praying

Oct 25th 2012 new

On many Interviews I have looked at there are questions I can't answer because they don't offer me an option I can identify with.. So I don't take that particular one.. I DON'T like this new format where you can't see all of the questions.. I would usually skip over some questions and go back to them later.. This format is unforgiving in that regard. If the first question happens to be one I can't answer, I stop right there.

Oct 25th 2012 new

(Quote) Matthew-523856 said: I'm going to throw this question to the men and women of the forum because I can't seem...
(Quote) Matthew-523856 said:

I'm going to throw this question to the men and women of the forum because I can't seem to resolve it myself. It regards a couple of points that often come up in interviews: First, the question of whether a wife should work or stay at home to raise the children; and secondly, whether I would prefer to send my children to public school, private school, Catholic school, or have them homeschooled.

My problem is that I can't answer either question because I do not insist personally on any of the answers to either question. That is, in the first regard, I would leave my wife completely free to choose her own career path (which is often not listed as an answer choice); and for the second, it seems like a future matter that would need to be worked out between the two of us a point in the future, taking into consideration our circumstances at the time.

Thanks for any help you can provide. I'm kind of at a loss here.



God bless,


Matt

--hide--


One way that may help you answer these questions is by asking yourself, if your wife was equally happy with whichever choice you made, which one would you choose?

Oct 25th 2012 new

(Quote) Maria-846262 said: I think the most important thing is for you to respond honestly about how you feel a...
(Quote) Maria-846262 said:


I think the most important thing is for you to respond honestly about how you feel about it. Women appreciate honesty from men.

--hide--


completely agree with this post!!! good luck!:)

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