Faith Focused Dating. Create your Free Profile and meet your Match! Sign Up for Free
A place to learn, mingle, and share

This room is for supportive and informative discussion about divorce and/or the annulment process. All posters must have been previously divorced or annulled.

Saint Eugene De Mazenod is patron of dysfunctional families & Saint Fabiola obtained a divorce from her first husband prior to devoting her life to charitable works.
Learn More: Saint Eugene De Mazenod and Saint Fabiola

Nov 1st 2012 new
I resemble that remark. Lol. I have stated from the Beginning of my joining here that I am looking for friendship only. i have stress the annulment is not in place and have even started a thread about dating without an annulment. I personally feel tha CM does what it can to encourage peoe to follow church teachings. We as adults need to step up to the bar so to speak. Ask questions of those you might be interested. Would you do different in person. I know i dont have in progress stamped on my forhead.
Nov 2nd 2012 new

I've had to struggle with this; I'm in the process of filing annulment and in some ways, yes, this site does present temptation. However, so does the world. I actually notified the moderators that the mobile site was popping up a button for matches when I shouldn't have that showing.

Nov 3rd 2012 new

I've been contacted by a gentleman whose profile states annulled, but the answer to Free to Marry says NO. So, I mentioned in my message back to him that this didn't make sense to me. He wrote back saying that his first marriage was annulled, but he is now separated from his second wife and they are waiting until after tax time to get divorced. He also has shared guardianship of a 10 year old boy (and this gentleman is in his 60's). I wrote him back saying that this was misleading since he wasn't even divorced from his second wife, etc. His response back to me was that he had been on the site before, got off, but rejoined (with a new number apparently) because he was so lonely and depressed until he could find another site. He says he is a devout Catholic - daily Mass, Knights of Columbus, etc. I suggested to him doing volunteer work, therapy for himself, and a divorce support group. And, I haven't heard back from him.

I'm wondering if it is my responsibility to do anything else here. I do feel sorry for him as he seems quite depressed/distraught from the tenor of his messages, but I don't think he should really be on this site. Also, I really don't want to "snitch" and turn him in. It would be better if he got himself off of the site. Any thoughts?

Nov 3rd 2012 new

(Quote) Patricia-29176 said: I've been contacted by a gentleman whose profile states annulled, but the answer to Free to...
(Quote) Patricia-29176 said:

I've been contacted by a gentleman whose profile states annulled, but the answer to Free to Marry says NO. So, I mentioned in my message back to him that this didn't make sense to me. He wrote back saying that his first marriage was annulled, but he is now separated from his second wife and they are waiting until after tax time to get divorced. He also has shared guardianship of a 10 year old boy (and this gentleman is in his 60's). I wrote him back saying that this was misleading since he wasn't even divorced from his second wife, etc. His response back to me was that he had been on the site before, got off, but rejoined (with a new number apparently) because he was so lonely and depressed until he could find another site. He says he is a devout Catholic - daily Mass, Knights of Columbus, etc. I suggested to him doing volunteer work, therapy for himself, and a divorce support group. And, I haven't heard back from him.

I'm wondering if it is my responsibility to do anything else here. I do feel sorry for him as he seems quite depressed/distraught from the tenor of his messages, but I don't think he should really be on this site. Also, I really don't want to "snitch" and turn him in. It would be better if he got himself off of the site. Any thoughts?

--hide--


Yes.. You need to submit a Help Ticket..He is not supposed to be here without a final decree of divorce.

Nov 3rd 2012 new

(Quote) Patricia-29176 said: I've been contacted by a gentleman whose profile states annulled, but the answer to Free to...
(Quote) Patricia-29176 said:

I've been contacted by a gentleman whose profile states annulled, but the answer to Free to Marry says NO. So, I mentioned in my message back to him that this didn't make sense to me. He wrote back saying that his first marriage was annulled, but he is now separated from his second wife and they are waiting until after tax time to get divorced. He also has shared guardianship of a 10 year old boy (and this gentleman is in his 60's). I wrote him back saying that this was misleading since he wasn't even divorced from his second wife, etc. His response back to me was that he had been on the site before, got off, but rejoined (with a new number apparently) because he was so lonely and depressed until he could find another site. He says he is a devout Catholic - daily Mass, Knights of Columbus, etc. I suggested to him doing volunteer work, therapy for himself, and a divorce support group. And, I haven't heard back from him.

I'm wondering if it is my responsibility to do anything else here. I do feel sorry for him as he seems quite depressed/distraught from the tenor of his messages, but I don't think he should really be on this site. Also, I really don't want to "snitch" and turn him in. It would be better if he got himself off of the site. Any thoughts?

--hide--


PS..My experience with married members in the past is that they don't take themselves off the site.. He will just move on to someone else.

Nov 3rd 2012 new

(Quote) Donna-83441 said: PS..My experience with married members in the past is that they don't take themse...
(Quote) Donna-83441 said:


PS..My experience with married members in the past is that they don't take themselves off the site.. He will just move on to someone else.

--hide--


Donna, I suspect he will know that I am the one who "turned him in." Has anyone ever had any problems from these guys when they have done that (harrassment?)

Nov 3rd 2012 new

(Quote) Patricia-29176 said:Donna, I suspect he will know that I am the one who "turned him in." Has anyone ever ...
(Quote) Patricia-29176 said:

Donna, I suspect he will know that I am the one who "turned him in." Has anyone ever had any problems from these guys when they have done that (harrassment?)

--hide--

Other people's experiences have no predictive value relative to what this person will (not) do. If you contacted him only on CM he wn't have any way to harass you even if he were inclined to do so.

Nov 3rd 2012 new

(Quote) Kathleen-878558 said: What is with all the bold letters? Software glitch, because I didn't choose them. On a se...
(Quote) Kathleen-878558 said: What is with all the bold letters? Software glitch, because I didn't choose them.

On a separate note, what spawned all of this was the recent CM article, Elizabeth Was Looking for Long Distance And Found Daniel www.catholicmatch.com

I placed a comment at the bottom of it. Seems like CM is confused about this policy as well, since they published the article.

Kathleen
--hide--

You may want to submit a Help ticket and point that out.

Nov 3rd 2012 new

(Quote) Patricia-29176 said: Donna, I suspect he will know that I am the one who "turned him in." Has anyo...
(Quote) Patricia-29176 said:



Donna, I suspect he will know that I am the one who "turned him in." Has anyone ever had any problems from these guys when they have done that (harrassment?)

--hide--


I find it ironic that you are suggesting earlier in the thread that divorced people should not be allowed to participate on CM, but that you would hesitate for even a minute to turn in a Help Ticket on someone that isn't even divorced yet. scratchchin

Nov 3rd 2012 new

(Quote) Donna-83441 said: I find it ironic that you are suggesting earlier in the thread that divorced people s...
(Quote) Donna-83441 said:


I find it ironic that you are suggesting earlier in the thread that divorced people should not be allowed to participate on CM, but that you would hesitate for even a minute to turn in a Help Ticket on someone that isn't even divorced yet.

--hide--


No, Donna, not ironic, but compassionate because his pain/suffering came across very clearly. It would have been emotionally/psychologically healthier for him to leave the site on his own. I don't see much difference between separated and divorced without annullment (and the church doesn't either apparently).

I find it ironic that you don't think divorced people without annullment should NOT somehow be noted in the profile that they are SEEKING ONLY FRIENDSHIP (when they say YES to Free to Marry unless their spouse is deceased) as in the eyes of the Church they are still married and should not be seeking romantic relationship.

Posts 21 - 30 of 93