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A place to learn, mingle, and share

This room is for those who have lost a spouse and need support or who can provide support to those who have.

Saint Paula is the patron saint of widows and Saint Stephen is the patron saint of deacons
Learn More: Saint Stephen and Saint Paula

rose It has come to my attention that when meeting a person who is at a distance the first problem that arises is how to be together for any extended time when that would require an overnight.
I was amazed not to have thought of that before as it presents the dreaded word "temptation".
Can we as adults - formerly married - come to know another person and not see them often due to the fact that they do not live nearby?
How can we "know" a person just from phone calls - writing and an occasional "date".
Since this is "Catholic" match I would think all of the possible mates on site hope to meet the new one and only and maintain their sanctity too.
I am sad to think that already I have met matches that made the aforementioned thoughts a reality.
Can one truly find another without seeing that person often - after they have decided YOU ARE THE ONE!
I think not. I pray that someone can lead me to a satisfactory answer in something written or on line. ....Amen.

Jan 9th 2013 new

(Quote) Mary-668515 said: It has come to my attention that when meeting a person who is at a distance the first problem that...
(Quote) Mary-668515 said:

It has come to my attention that when meeting a person who is at a distance the first problem that arises is how to be together for any extended time when that would require an overnight.
I was amazed not to have thought of that before as it presents the dreaded word "temptation".
Can we as adults - formerly married - come to know another person and not see them often due to the fact that they do not live nearby?
How can we "know" a person just from phone calls - writing and an occasional "date".
Since this is "Catholic" match I would think all of the possible mates on site hope to meet the new one and only and maintain their sanctity too.
I am sad to think that already I have met matches that made the aforementioned thoughts a reality.
Can one truly find another without seeing that person often - after they have decided YOU ARE THE ONE!
I think not. I pray that someone can lead me to a satisfactory answer in something written or on line. ....Amen.

--hide--

Some possibilities:

Stay in a motel.

Does the local person have friends or family members of the appropriate gender that can put the visitor up for a few days at a time?

Are there local CM members who would be willing to let you stay with them?

Jan 19th 2013 new

Mary, Yours is one of the toughest questions here to anwser, maybe that is why you have had so few responses.
My best advice, choose well. A man who honors your wish and who wishes the same for himself. You will be able to work together to keep each other from falling into temptation. heart

Jan 19th 2013 new

rose I want to reply to my own question on Temptation: As I am now in a relationship which will be a marriage soon...
One thing I never wanted to do was "live in a confessional". As a person whose whole life was the quest for deeper
spirituality and staying the journey to salvation I know how to answer my own request.
Never let your wish for love become a search for making love. Love making belongs to the sacrament of marriage. Being
in love is a wonderful way to feel before that event. True love never allows the breaking of a bond with our sanctifying grace and
that which keeps us in the conversation with God Our Father. I found that once I got over my initial need to know about my
new love and we shared the thoughts and feelings that were causing us to go "astray" we got "RIGHT BACK ON THE JOURNEY".
I thank God for giving me a helpmate on the road to heaven, for that was my prayer once I became a widow. Amen.

Jan 20th 2013 new
Absolutely beautifully stated!
Jan 21st 2013 new

WOW, good answer for us all! I wonder if others could ask their new match, after stating a clear intention to be pure until marriage, if he/she had suggestions of where to stay locally? I'm kind of in a quandry about searching outside my driving distance area, and this could be an issue for me later too. Thanks for posting.

Jan 21st 2013 new

(Quote) Caroline-930073 said: WOW, good answer for us all! I wonder if others could ask their new match, after stating a cle...
(Quote) Caroline-930073 said:

WOW, good answer for us all! I wonder if others could ask their new match, after stating a clear intention to be pure until marriage, if he/she had suggestions of where to stay locally? I'm kind of in a quandry about searching outside my driving distance area, and this could be an issue for me later too. Thanks for posting.

--hide--

Why not?

Another option is to ask in the forums. If you don't want your match to see the question, post it in the women's forum.

Mar 12th 2013 new

Love conquers the temptation because it's tough to find true love again.

Sex is overrated but love is not.

I believe honest communication and striving as a loving committed couple would

steers both to an mutual agreement quite easily.

Love is about sacrifice. Look at the Cross and the reminder comes alive.

So glad you have found love again.

For those seeking - fear not for the path will be clear.

Heading the right direction calls for prayers.






Mar 26th 2013 new

(Quote) Cliff-924625 said: Love conquers the temptation because it's tough to find true love again....
(Quote) Cliff-924625 said:

Love conquers the temptation because it's tough to find true love again.

Sex is overrated but love is not.

I believe honest communication and striving as a loving committed couple would

steers both to an mutual agreement quite easily.

Love is about sacrifice. Look at the Cross and the reminder comes alive.

So glad you have found love again.

For those seeking - fear not for the path will be clear.

Heading the right direction calls for prayers.









--hide--

Yes, love is a sacrifice and a choice worth waiting for! Satan knows our weaknesses, so we must not open the door to let him in! If we stay close to our Lord though prayer, masses, adoration, etc., there is no room for Satan. But, once we open that tiny crack in the door, he marches right in little by little.


Jerry, I agree with finding a place to sleep elsewhere when meeting someone long distance. It definitely deters us from temptation.

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