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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

11/12/2012 new

I have read most of the posts in this thread. Having been married before, I feel I have some facts to substantiate what I now offer.

For those never married, nothing wrong with having some reasonable parameters. Whether you would or would not marry someone with children or marrying a person who is 3/7 or not marrying a person previously married is a personal choice. What I think is most do not understand the person you marry today with all your "desirable characteristics" and letter perfect profile may not be the same person 3, 5 or 10 years later. Sometimes circumstances change people. When they become 4/7 instead of 7/7 or start chewing tobacco, dipping snuff or now having problems coexisting with your family, do you pack your bags along with the kids and hit the road?

In my 65 years of life, I have seen very few people who remain the same throughout life. In fact, I can count them on both thumbs.

Most choices in life involve risk. Relationships are no different.

So, my turnoff would be those whose image of reality is so tarnished.


Just my opinion.


Blessings, Praying Praying Praying


Leon

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11/12/2012 new
Dave seems like you are a pro at this , I will just keep reading and see how this all works ! Perhaps I will be a pro at this like you someday . Lol
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11/12/2012 new

Joanna, Your comments are great and so very honest. You made me laugh and it's so healthy to laugh.laughing

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11/12/2012 new

+

JMJ

The biggest turn off to me is when the guy takes a picture of himself in his bathroom mirror !!!! I am sorry but this is just the worst. Can't you find one person to take your picture ???

God Bless everyone !

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11/12/2012 new

The biggest turn off for me is when men/women have lists about what turns them off. Dove

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11/12/2012 new

(Quote) Linda-624584 said: The biggest turn off for me is when men/women have lists about what turns them off. ...
(Quote) Linda-624584 said:

The biggest turn off for me is when men/women have lists about what turns them off.

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Linda I think that everyone comes from different circumstances and this determines what one looks for in another and what is and is not desireable in a profile. In any event we are all different and that is a good thing. I believe there is someone for everyone. Regardless of whether members have a list or not I wish everyone luck in finding the one that is right for them.

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11/12/2012 new

(Quote) Linda-624584 said: The biggest turn off for me is when men/women have lists about what turns them off.
(Quote) Linda-624584 said:

The biggest turn off for me is when men/women have lists about what turns them off.

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Hahaha Yeah, it can be a turn off to start listing your turn offs.

However, I do think this was something interesting to bring up, because there are a lot of people here who automatically turn people down, and this is a good way to see the who's, why's and what's.

I have things I don't like, but it's about people as individuals, not so much their profiles--having pictures, yes to all the answers, etc. etc. It kills me to see people saying, "They're not 7/7 YES, so they aren't Catholic," I just wonder how people can be so...snobbish and closed minded. Being a Catholic does not have a prerequisite of agreeing 100% to those 7 checked yes (obviously I don't agree with this, and did not check off all 7 for yes'), and to me if someone does not it have them all "Yes" does not make them any less of a Catholic, but it does emphasize the hypocrites running rampant declaring who's a "real Catholic" and who's "Not." Now I stand and point out here that I believe in being a Christian before being a Catholic, too.

I find that utterly disappointing, and as Leon-593843 pointed out, people aren't going to stay the same, they change. It's inevitable, so this preconceived notion of who's really what will most likely be shattered on down the road, sooner or later. Their feelings and some beliefs may and will change, and there's nothing that can be done about that. Part of marriage, or just a serious relationship, is accepting those types of differences and continue moving forward.

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11/12/2012 new

At your age, it is completely realistic to expect that you may find a person with no children. The odds decrease exponentially the older you get. You seem to have an open mind though. You'll know if God calls you to something different than you plan. heart

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11/12/2012 new

(Quote) Leon-593843 said:In my 65 years of life, I have seen very few people who remain the same throughout life. In fact, ...
(Quote) Leon-593843 said:

In my 65 years of life, I have seen very few people who remain the same throughout life. In fact, I can count them on both thumbs.

Most choices in life involve risk. Relationships are no different.

--hide--
I hope I change! What is that saying that if you are not moving forward in your faith you are falling behind?

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11/12/2012 new

(Quote) Carl-98335 said: Not so much a word as experience. I dated one lady who said that she has high standards for herself...
(Quote) Carl-98335 said:

Not so much a word as experience. I dated one lady who said that she has high standards for herself, therefore she's entitled to the same in a man. She herself was climbing the corporate ladder and wanted someone of the same caliber. I was an Army Captain at the time, and didn't quite measure up. Another was waiting for her ex-boyfriend lawyer to reconcile, saying she was perfectly fine to stay single otherwise. And knowing some single women from my former parish on FB, one of whom got married later in life, telling all the other ladies to wait for the man who fit all the criteria, and not to "settle". Years earlier, well-meaning mutual friends tried to set us up on a date, which she balked at. She just took me for face value, not even accepting an opportunity to get to know me better. These are what come to mind for me when a woman's profile statement includes the word "independent". I'd love to be proven wrong, though.

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Sorry, Carl, that you have had some bad experiences. It goes both ways. When I meet someone, I don't ask what he does for
a living or what kind of car he drives, how successful he is. I let the conversation flow and see where it goes. Usually, it is more on a
personal level and I like getting to know that part of a person. Keep looking! She is out there!

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