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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
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Nov 19th 2012 new

I've been wondering about this recently.


In a little over two years (God willing!) I will graduate from medical school with my MD. I'm also a rather tall and athletic woman so I wonder if men are intimidated by this combination. I am attracted to men who are passionate and motivated in their field of work and I probably fall into Victor's former category... I care very little about the degree that a man has achieved. I find other qualities in men to be so much more attractive to me! However, in some cases a higher degree (or lack thereof) is an indication of underlying motivation (again, or lack thereof). I want to make this point very clear: Passion and motivation are very attractive qualities regardless of whether they coexist with a higher degree.

I think I can understand that many men may have a preference for "greater stature" than the woman that they date or marry. I don't want to underplay this dynamic because I do believe that it's important for a relationship to enhance and highlight the God-given masculinity and femininity of the man and woman respectively.


I have more thoughts on the subject, but they are currently not quite coherent so I will quit while I'm ahead.

Nov 19th 2012 new

I have a graduate degree but I don't care whether or not she has a graduate degree. The problem with looking at their level of education is that its too narrow of a way to judge somebody. I find a woman with brains to be very attractive but not book knowledge with no wordly wisdom, but just an overall cultural awareness, broad awareness of the world, openness to new ideas, and understanding of their own perspectives, things like that and those things aren't necessarily a part of how much education they have attained.

I do think its more likely that I will end up with someone with at least a college degree only because of similar life experiences. We've both probably went to college and then linked up to a career from there and I think that sort of similar past experience can form a common bond. But its not necessarily because I only want someone with just a college education it just seems to be a common experience.

Someone who started their own business after high school or had to take on big family responsibilities instead of going to college or military will probably have more worldly wisdom than I would have and it might not be an even match.

Nov 19th 2012 new

Excellent point Eric! I've mentioned many times that neither height, nor education make or break it for me. One of my most successful relationships was with a man who stood 5'2". I never really thought about height unless someone mentioned it. As long as 'little man syndrome' is not present, stature is irrelevant. heart

Nov 19th 2012 new
(Quote) Donna-83441 said: I'm in the camp that says high education doesn't make a good husband, just as a lack...
(Quote) Donna-83441 said:




I'm in the camp that says high education doesn't make a good husband, just as a lack of education doesn't make one a poor husband.. Put that in your pipe and smoke it..

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Donna you are a very wise woman! I am also,of the mind if this person is the one God intended for you then things will work out even if there are factors that cause the relationship to develop more slowly. When I first came on CM years ago I knew I had goals that needed to happen before I would be free to move if I found Mr perfect for me. And I truly believe even now if the person I dated had been the one God intended for me then it would have worked out......sometimes we must be patient and Let God write the Love story for us.......
Nov 19th 2012 new

Thank you all for the comments. Like I said in my original post, I agree that education does not make a person. But I do want to point out that the American education-system is very different than the European/Dutch-education system. I noticed all of you are talking about how and what you have experienced. Which is of course more than logical, and what I wanted, Your experiences and opinion. But I also realize that allot that you are saying does not apply in my society. But keep them coming! It's a way for me to get a feel of the American mentality and society! :)

Nov 19th 2012 new

(Quote) Sally-894891 said: Thank you all for the comments. Like I said in my original post, I agree that education does not ...
(Quote) Sally-894891 said:

Thank you all for the comments. Like I said in my original post, I agree that education does not make a person. But I do want to point out that the American education-system is very different than the European/Dutch-education system. I noticed all of you are talking about how and what you have experienced. Which is of course more than logical, and what I wanted, Your experiences and opinion. But I also realize that allot that you are saying does not apply in my society. But keep them coming! It's a way for me to get a feel of the American mentality and society! :)

--hide--


Could you explain a bit about these difference between American and European/Dutch society? I am puzzled.

Nov 19th 2012 new

I don't care about the degree as much as the work ethic. I don't have any initials behind my name, but I go to work and do my best each day. I would expect the same from my spouse. Character is more important to me than status. If we can balance our budget together, I'm good. I'm not in the market for riches, so knowing how to fix things should be in his knowledge bank!

Nov 19th 2012 new

(Quote) John-857142 said: Could you explain a bit about these difference between American and European/Dutch so...
(Quote) John-857142 said:


Could you explain a bit about these difference between American and European/Dutch society? I am puzzled.

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Of Course I can! Well in the US only holding a degree is not enough, it also matters to which college or university you went to. Like Harvard is of-course very prestigious. A degree from Harvard will be much more valued in society than a degree from a less known university. In Holland it works a bit different. We don't have universities or colleges that are better than others, as the government makes sure that all are functioning properly. Every school has different methods, so a student can choose which one they want to attend and also depending on what type of program they want to study. the school system is a bit complicated and rather long to explain. So here's a link with all the info about it: en.wikipedia.org
When it comes to tuition, it is ridiculously high in the US. I studied without debt, because the government helps with the tuition and tuition for dutch citizens is very low. So not going to college because of money issues is a foolish excuse in the Netherlands, because the government pays everything. We even get a public transportation card to travel through the Netherlands for free! Only in the weekends we have to pay with a 40% discount. No matter how intelligent, talented or rich you are. The Dutch government provides education for everyone who is motivated for it and willing to work for their degree. But in the USA I can understand how it is a problem. If your parents can't pay your education, or if you cannot get a scholarship.

Hope that clears things up a bit?

Nov 19th 2012 new

(Quote) Sally-894891 said: Thank you all for the comments. Like I said in my original post, I agree that education does not ...
(Quote) Sally-894891 said:

Thank you all for the comments. Like I said in my original post, I agree that education does not make a person. But I do want to point out that the American education-system is very different than the European/Dutch-education system. I noticed all of you are talking about how and what you have experienced. Which is of course more than logical, and what I wanted, Your experiences and opinion. But I also realize that allot that you are saying does not apply in my society. But keep them coming! It's a way for me to get a feel of the American mentality and society! :)

--hide--
Sally--I'd be very interested in your perspective and the culture that is there in the Netherlands. I just went out this weekend with a man who was born and raised there through his early 20's. He is intelligent and educated, and has continued to keep very engaged in just about every possible topic that came up during our time together. I actually enjoyed his conversation, but I have to say that I ended up feeling "under-educated", and I have an advanced degree in Education! I don't consider myself "book smart", rather I am a student of the earth kind of person. Can you illuminate me a bit so I can better understand the cultural difference? Thanks!

Nov 19th 2012 new

Degrees should not make a difference in whether a couple matches. My late wife had an associates degree and I have an advanced doctoral degree. She had more common sense and ability to think things through than I have ever had. We "matched" on many levels and it was refreshing to have her viewpoint on everything we tried to do. I believe that everyone should get all the education they are able to and if a person rules out potential matches based on differing education levels, they are missing out on what could potentially be the love of their lifetime......as mine was. thankk goodness I didn't rule her out way back then.

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