I think a dealbreaker is when you bring up a serious concern and it gets ignored.
Poor communication and not being respected are serious red flags to me.
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I think it's very important for you to know your deal breakers and discuss them early. Time is so short with the hectic lives people lead, so it's not fair to either person to not discuss them. Most of my deal breakers (I want kids) are answered in the profile questions on here, so I may not bring the subject up but would be happy to discuss it with whomever I'm talking to.