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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Nov 25th 2012 new

(Quote) Cat-163322 said: Seeing as how WWII wasn't the first war in the history of the world, I wonder, how did ...
(Quote) Cat-163322 said:



Seeing as how WWII wasn't the first war in the history of the world, I wonder, how did previous times handle the very same issue, which was men leaving for war and women left to do everything else? Just asking the question, because I think you are on to something, but wondering if the inustrial revolution has played a part as well.

Cat

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That is an interesting question. Certainly the Industrial Revolution changed the lifestyle of most people. Before this time, most families were farmers. This is why it was extremely rare to find anybody unmarried and even rarer to find families that didn't have more than 7 children. Women needed a man to provide for them because a woman couldn't farm by herself. In turn, she provided him with children who would then work the fields. The more children you had, the easier it would be to farm. But the Revolution changed all of that. Women no longer needed men to provide for them and men no longer needed a wife to bear him children. So the role of marriage changed fundamentally, with people getting married out of love, not necessity. With this change in marriage, people relied more on their feelings, which is a bad concept becauses feelings change. Before, people understood the intrinsic value of 'till death do us part'. But by the 20th century, people could have options. They could wait to get married, date many people before settling, or not get married at all. As a result, we lost the concept of courting in favor of this new idea called "dating."

I do believe WWII sped up the transformation which began with the Industrial Revolution. It was then that women realized they could do everything a man could, so many wanted to stay in the workforce. This also happened during WWI, but was much less pronounced. So Radical Feminism didn't start this process, but it did play a part in the 70's.

Nov 25th 2012 new

(Quote) Cory-789423 said: That's why God created Eve for Adam. She wasn't created to cook for Adam, clean for him, a...
(Quote) Cory-789423 said:

That's why God created Eve for Adam. She wasn't created to cook for Adam, clean for him, and wait on him hand and foot. No, she was created so that Adam's masculinity can be fully revealed. I firmly believe that women today have lost that message. If they want to marry a good man, they need to express their feminine qualities. Just like the author says, they need to let men be men. Let them lead. And we men need to respect women, to value them as women created in God's image. But we can't do that if women don't value themselves. Remember, how women act and behave will influence how we men will view them. Their femininity affects our masculinity.

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Well said, Cory!

Nov 25th 2012 new

(Quote) Jacqueline-556574 said: Here is a good defense for women in dating men who believe that women are not feminine enough: ...
(Quote) Jacqueline-556574 said: Here is a good defense for women in dating men who believe that women are not feminine enough:

1. Put on a dress and look like a woman.

(Sometimes we don't have much control over prevailing styles. If shoes or clothing looks too masculine, don't buy into it).
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I have to speak to this one, even though I could get in trouble!

Or how about if the shoes or clothing of a woman look more like the clothing of a prostitute of the 1950s or whatever? I am so turned off at the numbers of women I see who wear clothing that has been almost painted on to them. I am talking of even older women with children, and in relationships--professional women. I see women with the most skin tight tops and bottoms all over the place. super mini skirts. Look at the women on Fox for example. Ridiculous! You see this woman in the shortest of miniskirts, as much leg showing as possible; and then there are two men--each dressed in full suits! Why is the woman always dressed like a tart? Maybe the men should be wearing briefs and t shirts instead of suits: that would balance it off.

Women, dress like women and not like women of the streets. Put on a modest dress and look like a respectable woman. This is step no. 1. There is at least one man out there--me--who is repulsed by a grown up woman who dresses as revealingly as possible.

I realize this is a twist on what Jacqueline was saying, but it needs to be said. If women want to be regarded with less lust and more respect by real men, then an awful lot of them need to stop dressing like harlots. And people wonder at the number of violent crimes against women... I really feel bad for you, poor women. You are always exploited in one way or another.

Nov 25th 2012 new

I do my best to treat all women equal but I've caught myself at times being ignorant about what women can do. However, all I want from women in general are equal respect for men too. I've met women that likes the idea of being always right and I find ways to forgive them later on. I'm working on understanding how women behave around men. I've noticed in my age group that they're more women wanting to have "their way or the highway" mentality. It takes so much patience for a man to not show anger when they meet a woman who could careless about a man's opinion. Sometimes, I would notice a woman would ignore the man's logic or reasoning on the matter present which if analyzed by other people that the man's point is valid too.

In the end of the day, a gal who will share the adventures of life is my kind of woman.

Nov 25th 2012 new

(Quote) Cory-789423 said: First let me apologize to those who may have mis-interpreted my intent with this article. I can se...
(Quote) Cory-789423 said:

First let me apologize to those who may have mis-interpreted my intent with this article. I can see that some of you feel that I believe that women should stay in the kitchen and let the man handle everything else. This is not my belief at all. Rather, my views on this topic is quite the opposite. I've always taken a pragmatic approach to relationships and I do what works best, not what is ideal. I would not in the least feel threatened if my future wife made more than me. I am a teacher myself (although the market is very tough where I am so I'm substituting for the moment) so more than likely my wife would probably have to work as well if we desire to have a large family.

As I read the comments, I see many think of providing in material terms, not spiritual. For the Catholic father and husband, his primary role is to lead his family to Heaven. That can be accomplished regardless if he makes less than his wife or, in rare cases, is a stay-at-home dad. I'm not chauvinistic and I encourage women to earn a living. But I do think every couple need to talk about their roles in the relationship to make sure that the man can express his masculinity and the woman her femininity. It's up to each couple to determine how that is done.

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I just got back from my daily Holy Hour, and i was talking to our Lord about the same thing here. All the stuff in this post has been about this- worldly matters, and not about the supernatural: who makes more money, who is more muscular.............etc....Marriage in such a case is reduced to a non sacramental idea, if this approach is pushed too far.

However, be aware that as history has shown over and over again, 'woman' is the more devout sext. That is true, generally speaking, without question. So often, here again, it may very well be the woman who leads the man by her devotion and piety. Notice, I said 'often' and not 'always'. If a man is deeply spiritual--deeply spiritual--and reasonably skilled at decision-making, then he could in a real sense be a big force in leading his family to heaven.

Of course, deeply spiritual must mean more than getting to Mass on Sundays. It means living a real prayer life--daily. An active Sacramental life, frequent if not daily Communion, frequent Confession. This is a tall order for a man with a full time job and family. Mumbling morning prayers and weekly Mass doth not a deep spiritual life make!

All have to work together, and if the man is a real man of God, he could be a good leader to God as well, regardless of his money or machismo. Still a tall order in the practical realm, though on paper it looks really great

Nov 25th 2012 new
All I know is feminist indoctrination in school made me confused about attracting women.
Nov 25th 2012 new

(Quote) John-220051 said: All I know is feminist indoctrination in school made me confused about attracting women.
(Quote) John-220051 said: All I know is feminist indoctrination in school made me confused about attracting women.
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Please elaborate what the feminist indoctrination you refer to is. I don't doubt you but I need a better explanation. It makes me sad that this evil thing came along and has directly ruined and impacted families and family life.

Nov 25th 2012 new

(Quote) John-904878 said: (Quote) Cory-789423 said: First let me apologize to those who may have mis-...
(Quote) John-904878 said:

Quote:
Cory-789423 said:

First let me apologize to those who may have mis-interpreted my intent with this article. I can see that some of you feel that I believe that women should stay in the kitchen and let the man handle everything else. This is not my belief at all. Rather, my views on this topic is quite the opposite. I've always taken a pragmatic approach to relationships and I do what works best, not what is ideal. I would not in the least feel threatened if my future wife made more than me. I am a teacher myself (although the market is very tough where I am so I'm substituting for the moment) so more than likely my wife would probably have to work as well if we desire to have a large family.

As I read the comments, I see many think of providing in material terms, not spiritual. For the Catholic father and husband, his primary role is to lead his family to Heaven. That can be accomplished regardless if he makes less than his wife or, in rare cases, is a stay-at-home dad. I'm not chauvinistic and I encourage women to earn a living. But I do think every couple need to talk about their roles in the relationship to make sure that the man can express his masculinity and the woman her femininity. It's up to each couple to determine how that is done.



I just got back from my daily Holy Hour, and i was talking to our Lord about the same thing here. All the stuff in this post has been about this- worldly matters, and not about the supernatural: who makes more money, who is more muscular.............etc....Marriage in such a case is reduced to a non sacramental idea, if this approach is pushed too far.

However, be aware that as history has shown over and over again, 'woman' is the more devout sext. That is true, generally speaking, without question. So often, here again, it may very well be the woman who leads the man by her devotion and piety. Notice, I said 'often' and not 'always'. If a man is deeply spiritual--deeply spiritual--and reasonably skilled at decision-making, then he could in a real sense be a big force in leading his family to heaven.

Of course, deeply spiritual must mean more than getting to Mass on Sundays. It means living a real prayer life--daily. An active Sacramental life, frequent if not daily Communion, frequent Confession. This is a tall order for a man with a full time job and family. Mumbling morning prayers and weekly Mass doth not a deep spiritual life make!

All have to work together, and if the man is a real man of God, he could be a good leader to God as well, regardless of his money or machismo. Still a tall order in the practical realm, though on paper it looks really great

--hide--


Both posts here are really good and make great points. If women do not or can not express their femininity and men feel they can't express their masculinity both suffer in one way or another.

Nov 25th 2012 new

(Quote) John-904878 said: I have to speak to this one, even though I could get in trouble! Or how about if t...
(Quote) John-904878 said:

I have to speak to this one, even though I could get in trouble!

Or how about if the shoes or clothing of a woman look more like the clothing of a prostitute of the 1950s or whatever? I am so turned off at the numbers of women I see who wear clothing that has been almost painted on to them. I am talking of even older women with children, and in relationships--professional women. I see women with the most skin tight tops and bottoms all over the place. super mini skirts. Look at the women on Fox for example. Ridiculous! You see this woman in the shortest of miniskirts, as much leg showing as possible; and then there are two men--each dressed in full suits! Why is the woman always dressed like a tart? Maybe the men should be wearing briefs and t shirts instead of suits: that would balance it off.

Women, dress like women and not like women of the streets. Put on a modest dress and look like a respectable woman. This is step no. 1. There is at least one man out there--me--who is repulsed by a grown up woman who dresses as revealingly as possible.

I realize this is a twist on what Jacqueline was saying, but it needs to be said. If women want to be regarded with less lust and more respect by real men, then an awful lot of them need to stop dressing like harlots. And people wonder at the number of violent crimes against women... I really feel bad for you, poor women. You are always exploited in one way or another.

--hide--
My daughters would let me have it I dressed like that. They would be embarrassed! I don't understand how women (especially with children do that.

Nov 25th 2012 new

(Quote) Ezrah-891754 said: I do my best to treat all women equal but I've caught myself at times being ignorant about wh...
(Quote) Ezrah-891754 said:

I do my best to treat all women equal but I've caught myself at times being ignorant about what women can do. However, all I want from women in general are equal respect for men too. I've met women that likes the idea of being always right and I find ways to forgive them later on. I'm working on understanding how women behave around men. I've noticed in my age group that they're more women wanting to have "their way or the highway" mentality. It takes so much patience for a man to not show anger when they meet a woman who could careless about a man's opinion. Sometimes, I would notice a woman would ignore the man's logic or reasoning on the matter present which if analyzed by other people that the man's point is valid too.

In the end of the day, a gal who will share the adventures of life is my kind of woman.

--hide--


Hear, hear! Just as important, we men must take our partner's thoughts and opinions into consideration when we make decisions as well. Women love it when men take the lead, but they hate just as much when their opinions are not considered.

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