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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Dec 2nd 2012 new

(Quote) John-220051 said: What makes a man attractive and boyfriend/husband material?
(Quote) John-220051 said: What makes a man attractive and boyfriend/husband material?
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I guess the longer I've been here the odder this might seem but FAITH SHARED is huge! In the day to day life of people, it is difficult to find people of the opposite gender who you can share your faith with. Sure they might accept a few things of faith but to connect with someone else on such a deep level is truly a gift and a blessing and it to creates a signifigant pull towards a person when I find it.

I wont go into the reasons here but men who love their children are higly attractive to me! If you don't have kids, its ok. I just know that this element tugs at my heart.

I dont expect a man to support me but a man who works is attractive. I know that some people have disabilities that keep them from doing so and that doesn't mean that they aren't worthy of love but WORKING is attractove to me.

The physical traits are random. It is odd. Maybe it isn't. I have dated tall men, short men, slender, heavy set, bald, hair upon hair, and in each of them I found things attractive in the way they looked. Their eyes were warm their smile melted my heart. I guess these were the common factors they shared. I like the firtatious banter though but don't we all?

Virtues...this kind of wraps it all together. Integrity in his faith, family, and work. Compassion when seeing others struggle. Kindness and charitability, do they try to look at what good lies within people or are they quick tempered? I fun loving peacefilled spirit works on my heart.

with all of this being said...PLEASE Father, help me be these gifts to someone in return! Amen

Dec 2nd 2012 new
My last girlfriend went nuts because I was close to my mother. She even picked a fight with me six months after the event because I hugged my Mom in front of her on her birthday.
Dec 2nd 2012 new

(Quote) John-220051 said: My last girlfriend went nuts because I was close to my mother. She even picked a fight with me six months...
(Quote) John-220051 said: My last girlfriend went nuts because I was close to my mother. She even picked a fight with me six months after the event because I hugged my Mom in front of her on her birthday.
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The mother thing might be a different thread....but I generally like men who value their mother. If they would be in a relationship with me I would want to share time with my inlaws and my Dad. If my Dad however, tried to come inbetween my husband and I, I would have to clearly set the record straight with my Dad. My husband is the one I'm in a sacrament with. NOT my dad. As a child of God I am called to have honor and love for my parents and hope to have love and honor for his. I hope his family will become mine and mine his. It is how my heart thinks... the real practice of it may have to deviate from that in various ways however. I had a great mother inlaw. We weren't "friends" but we really did care for each other and we respected each other. I want a mother inlaw that understand that I want to love her son and in doing so I'm not trying to take him from her. I will add this however.... my ex husband was NOT good to his mom. I called her NOT him. I found that sad. It is quite possible that if I hadn't done that she would have thought that I was keeping him from her and it was far from the truth. He just wasn't good at staying connected to his parents....sad

Dec 2nd 2012 new

John, I feel that good grooming is an essential. As far as physical stuff is concerned, I would almost prefer not to date any man who is real good looking. This is not universal, but many good-looking men tend often to be full of themselves. Love of faith, and character, and sense of humour are remarkably more attractive to me than a man's physical characteristics. ((I happened to grow up in your area. Ever heard of "little" Saint Mary's??)) wave

Dec 2nd 2012 new
Dec 2nd 2012 new

(Quote) John-220051 said: My last girlfriend went nuts because I was close to my mother. She even picked a fight with me six months...
(Quote) John-220051 said: My last girlfriend went nuts because I was close to my mother. She even picked a fight with me six months after the event because I hugged my Mom in front of her on her birthday.
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Wow, was she the "wrong one". So glad she is a former girlfriend, John.


My husband loved his mother, but I was fortunate enough to hear him defend me when we first married and she tried to come between us. He let her know, very respectfully, that I was his wife and he first loyalty was with me. After that, we never had any problems. And, in fact, she was one of my best friends. Now, I know there are mothers that can't or won't let go. I had one. While I always treated her with respect, there did come a time when I had to respectfully tell her that we would not be seeing her for a while until she could show respect to my husband.


Life can be so interesting.


- Elizabeth

Dec 2nd 2012 new

(Quote) John-220051 said: My last girlfriend went nuts because I was close to my mother. She even picked a fight with me six months...
(Quote) John-220051 said: My last girlfriend went nuts because I was close to my mother. She even picked a fight with me six months after the event because I hugged my Mom in front of her on her birthday.
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Good for you! I would never want a mama's boy... That's a whole diferent issue.

As for her, I can summon it on 2 comments:

Operative Word: LAST!

Pick a Fight: She was looking for an excuse to quarrel...



Dec 2nd 2012 new

(Quote) Khoa-813439 said: It's interesting! If the majority of women are not into physical attraction, why then most messages s...
(Quote) Khoa-813439 said: It's interesting! If the majority of women are not into physical attraction, why then most messages sent to women on this site are not answered? You can't say that it's because you are not attracted to his profile because profiles don't say much at all about the person. And as Donna brought up earlier, many women will ignore profiles that do not have pictures. I guess I'm talking to the wrong audience here :)
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Khoa, maybe because nobody would want to admit to it. I wonder how many messages (or response to messages) will a man gifted with all the attractive virtues/traits as identified in this thread get if he is without a picture? I know where to place my bet

Dec 2nd 2012 new

A HUGE SMILE biggrin

Dec 2nd 2012 new

(Quote) Nancy-838315 said: Rereading my post, I can see my reference was not clear. I was not meaning ...
(Quote) Nancy-838315 said:


Rereading my post, I can see my reference was not clear. I was not meaning to state that you assume that of people. I was trying to use an example of dating a man who lacks fidelity. One life experience dating a man who cheats = all men are lying cheaters .... I meant to state that this is a logical falicy.


In the end, whatever floats your boat. (Not to be a relativist, but I don't have the energy to talk you out of something you already believe about yourself and women in general.) I get tired of the search for "physical perfection" that is so a part of our society... especially California culture.... especially at the cost of moral purity and even self-decency. (To clarify, not mking these statements about you... just clarifying what I have witnessed in my life experience.) Physical beauty may be a part of initial attraction, but both fade. I'm just looking for more...

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Thank you. And I am not expecting you to talk me out of anything.

I believe you missed the point I was trying to make. If we continually deny the role of physical looks that makes a man attractive, and solely base a man's attractiveness on good virtues and traits, why then are the "good men" of CM not selling out like hot cakes to the women here?

The other point I was trying to get across is, some people are apprehensive about admitting that it was the physical looks that made them initially attracted to a man. Such apprehension maybe from fear of being judged as shallow or superficial.

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