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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Dec 18th 2012 new

(Quote) Pat-5351 said: Just looking and looking repeatedly over many long months means he is not a paying member, comes to C...
(Quote) Pat-5351 said:

Just looking and looking repeatedly over many long months means he is not a paying member, comes to Cm occasionally and sees you "anew" each time and looks at you. But the entire experience does not prompt him to do anything (like actually pay up, or write).

--hide--


That's not always true. Sometimes, it's just circumstantial. While browsing profiles I frequently come across profiles that I recall seeing several times prior. If I then remember sending that person a prior message, but not receiving a reply, I'm certainly not going to waste my time sending another message (I do NOT send a second message if the first isn't replied to) regardless of whether or not I viewed her profile.


theheart

Dec 18th 2012 new

(Quote) Molly-236515 said: So my sister and I were talking about those lovely emails that tell you. "Johnny has viewed ...
(Quote) Molly-236515 said:

So my sister and I were talking about those lovely emails that tell you. "Johnny has viewed your profile!!!!" I say if there is no follow up with a message/emotiongram etc., then it is another rejection. She says that he wants you to view his profile and respond. What do you think????

--hide--

Hi Molly,

From time to time, I'll view a profile be interested, but not send a message normally this is because there maybe some "gray area" like distanice or something. Other times, i just don't feel like send an emotegram at the moment so I'll wait for a view back or something.

Dec 19th 2012 new

(Quote) Kelly-846180 said: I think my response would have to be, "Who cares!?" If, after viewing my profile, he...
(Quote) Kelly-846180 said:

I think my response would have to be, "Who cares!?" If, after viewing my profile, he's not interested enough to start communication, I'm not going to bother. Don't be shy, gentlemen! Step up to the plate!

--hide--

this is what I've decided as well. It seems that a man as a pursuer ought to do something if he wants too. I don't want to be someone's mommy and tell him what to do all the time!

Dec 19th 2012 new

I am new here and have only viewed a few profiles. When I view a profile that is from someone that is not even near me it is almost always because they wrote something in these forums that I found very enlightening and profound. So I want to see what is in the profile that makes them a special person based on something that they said which touched my heart or that I found to be extraordinary. I think it is a bit of a stretch to think that someone is being rejected because of that. That said, I suppose a quick emotigram with a smile just to say "I enjoyed reading your profile, and I think you are nice..." might be a good thing to do, though...

(Quote) Molly-236515 said: So my sister and I were talking about those lovely emails that tell you. "Johnny has viewed ...
(Quote) Molly-236515 said:

So my sister and I were talking about those lovely emails that tell you. "Johnny has viewed your profile!!!!" I say if there is no follow up with a message/emotiongram etc., then it is another rejection. She says that he wants you to view his profile and respond. What do you think????

--hide--

Dec 19th 2012 new

(Quote) Molly-236515 said: So my sister and I were talking about those lovely emails that tell you. "Johnny has viewed ...
(Quote) Molly-236515 said:

So my sister and I were talking about those lovely emails that tell you. "Johnny has viewed your profile!!!!" I say if there is no follow up with a message/emotiongram etc., then it is another rejection. She says that he wants you to view his profile and respond. What do you think????

--hide--



If that is true, then the guy is a bit passive aggressive, and that's just not my thing. I don't take is as rejection either. I assume their keyboard blew up right as they were about to write me an incredibly sweet, romantic emotigram with a cup of Joe attached. cool

Dec 19th 2012 new

Victor this entire thread is about the person who looks but NEVER writes. Your example is that you wrote before, and then realize it.

Seriously, I have not said anything suggestive that every look requires a message, quite the opposite. I have just given my opinion as to when and how and why a woman gets several looks, and not correspondence from a man.

Dec 19th 2012 new

(Quote) Pat-5351 said: Victor this entire thread is about the person who looks but NEVER writes. Your example is that you wr...
(Quote) Pat-5351 said:

Victor this entire thread is about the person who looks but NEVER writes. Your example is that you wrote before, and then realize it.

Seriously, I have not said anything suggestive that every look requires a message, quite the opposite. I have just given my opinion as to when and how and why a woman gets several looks, and not correspondence from a man.

--hide--


I was presenting a different scenario based on my own personal experience, not arguing your point of view or even offering an opinion of my own, darling! biggrin


theheart

Dec 19th 2012 new

(Quote) Kathleen-878558 said: I will create Searches, or see someone in a thread, in whom I might be interested and I will ...
(Quote) Kathleen-878558 said:

I will create Searches, or see someone in a thread, in whom I might be interested and I will click on their photo and look at their profile. If he looks back at my profile, but don't send me an emotigram or a message, I interpret that as him not being interested. So I guess, I am willing to "drop the hankie", as Victor called it, but then I expect/hope the man will do something more significant if he is interested in me. I have come to realize I need a man to take charge from the get go, because I want him to take charge in the relationship/marriage.

I just came across this CM if anyone is interested. It came out today and is about this very topic. Here is an excerpt.

CatholicMatch Men: Lead And We Will Follow

"If a man, according to Scripture, is the 'head of a wife,' well then us CatholicMatch ladies should be sitting back with our feet up waiting for noble CatholicMatch men to make the first move, right?

According to Scott Croft, a contributor to Focus on the Familys 'Boundless' webzine, the answer is, indeed, yes. He wrote in his 2005 post:

'I think it is part of our job as men to risk rejection and be the initiators of dates and dating relationships, and if you wait until she has gone out on a limb and made her interest known, youre asking her to take the risk instead of taking it on yourself.'

Croft goes on to say that a woman pursuing a man sets a tone in the relationship for reversed biblical roles in marriage:

'The much wiser course in a dating contextboth for purposes of evaluating a potential spouse in biblical terms and to lay the groundwork for a biblically sound marriageis for the guy to model godly initiative and leadership with the womans good in mind, and for the woman to respond to that leadership.' - www.catholicmatch.com
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But, Kathleen, the fact is that a woman must chase a man until he catches her. Or, as a wise CM lady said, "Men hunt; women fish."

Sometimes the gents need a little prodding -- or a swift kick in the posterior to get them motivated. It's unfortunate, but true.

Dec 19th 2012 new

(Quote) Naomi-825244 said: (Quote) Kelly-846180 said: I think my response would have to be, "Who...
(Quote) Naomi-825244 said:

Quote:
Kelly-846180 said:

I think my response would have to be, "Who cares!?" If, after viewing my profile, he's not interested enough to start communication, I'm not going to bother. Don't be shy, gentlemen! Step up to the plate!


this is what I've decided as well. It seems that a man as a pursuer ought to do something if he wants too. I don't want to be someone's mommy and tell him what to do all the time!

--hide--


Does it make a difference when the guy is living in a different country? I do notice the majority of the members are from USA. Many of my searches are from the States even though I tried to maintain it within my country.

Dec 19th 2012 new
(Quote) Ray-566531 said: But, Kathleen, the fact is that a woman must chase a man until he catches her. Or, as a wise CM lady said, "...
(Quote) Ray-566531 said:

But, Kathleen, the fact is that a woman must chase a man until he catches her. Or, as a wise CM lady said, "Men hunt; women fish."



Sometimes the gents need a little prodding -- or a swift kick in the posterior to get them motivated. It's unfortunate, but true.

--hide--


Ray, I think my viewing men's profiles in Searches and from Threads is my way of giving gents a nudge.
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