Faith Focused Dating. Create your Free Profile and meet your Match! Sign Up for Free
A place to learn, mingle, and share

Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Dec 30th 2012 new

I think there are three, probably already mentioned ways, that for me, work well. First the little things. After I buy dinner, or share my jacket or umbrella, I like it a lot when a girl smiles back and says thank you. A touch on the upper arm is really nice as well. Second, let men lead. I once went on a date with a girl to a mutual friend's weeding, and she repeatedly agreed to dance with me at a specific time, and kept suggesting we do it later. When we made it to the dance floor, she asked if she could lead the dance. I said no, she seemed very nervous during the dance, and so I never asked her again. Third, find something you can do with the man you want to court you, and have there be something that cannot be completed without his help. Men like doing things and the high of accomplishment that comes with a completed task. I once dated a girl who when having me over for dinner always had a couple to tasks she needed me to do before dinner. We dated six years ago, and now that I have lived on my own for a while, I realize she could have done everything she asked me to do on her own. But, it was a very effective tactic of making me feel wanted. Sometimes when a man accomplishes something with a woman as a team, it sets his mind on other things they might accomplish together.

Dec 30th 2012 new

(Quote) Matthew-617971 said: I think there are three, probably already mentioned ways, that for me, work well. First the lit...
(Quote) Matthew-617971 said:

I think there are three, probably already mentioned ways, that for me, work well. First the little things. After I buy dinner, or share my jacket or umbrella, I like it a lot when a girl smiles back and says thank you. A touch on the upper arm is really nice as well. Second, let men lead. I once went on a date with a girl to a mutual friend's weeding, and she repeatedly agreed to dance with me at a specific time, and kept suggesting we do it later. When we made it to the dance floor, she asked if she could lead the dance. I said no, she seemed very nervous during the dance, and so I never asked her again. Third, find something you can do with the man you want to court you, and have there be something that cannot be completed without his help. Men like doing things and the high of accomplishment that comes with a completed task. I once dated a girl who when having me over for dinner always had a couple to tasks she needed me to do before dinner. We dated six years ago, and now that I have lived on my own for a while, I realize she could have done everything she asked me to do on her own. But, it was a very effective tactic of making me feel wanted. Sometimes when a man accomplishes something with a woman as a team, it sets his mind on other things they might accomplish together.

--hide--
And if a woman asks a man to do a couple of tasks for her (small things, not painting the house or digging up the yard or anything like that!), and he either shows resentment or reluctance when he does them, or he doesn't ever do them--is it safe to say that he's a selfish jerk...I mean, that he's not dating the woman for the right reasons?

Dec 30th 2012 new

BRILLIANT!!

Dec 30th 2012 new

(Quote) Matthew-617971 said: I think there are three, probably already mentioned ways, that for me, work well. First the lit...
(Quote) Matthew-617971 said:

I think there are three, probably already mentioned ways, that for me, work well. First the little things. After I buy dinner, or share my jacket or umbrella, I like it a lot when a girl smiles back and says thank you. A touch on the upper arm is really nice as well. Second, let men lead. I once went on a date with a girl to a mutual friend's weeding, and she repeatedly agreed to dance with me at a specific time, and kept suggesting we do it later. When we made it to the dance floor, she asked if she could lead the dance. I said no, she seemed very nervous during the dance, and so I never asked her again. Third, find something you can do with the man you want to court you, and have there be something that cannot be completed without his help. Men like doing things and the high of accomplishment that comes with a completed task. I once dated a girl who when having me over for dinner always had a couple to tasks she needed me to do before dinner. We dated six years ago, and now that I have lived on my own for a while, I realize she could have done everything she asked me to do on her own. But, it was a very effective tactic of making me feel wanted. Sometimes when a man accomplishes something with a woman as a team, it sets his mind on other things they might accomplish together.

--hide--



Thank you for your comments, here, Matthew .... all the best in your search!








fluffy snowman fluffy snowman fluffy snowman fluffy snowman fluffy


Dec 30th 2012 new

How about...I have everything I need.

What I want from a man is to share my life and love; and to do things for me because he wants to, not because I ask him too.

There are plenty of men that want to buy things and do things for me but what I want they seem to struggle with:

Love and Friendship. Is it inherently wrong to NOT have expectations? The more you expect the more chance you take of being let down. Lets face it, you can't make someone want or need you in return, or behave the way you want them too - right?

I feel like I think too differently from others sometimes, so I apologize if my responses seem odd.

Dec 30th 2012 new

No, your scenario is very general and describes a variety of possible situations. I think if he does not do simple chore for several days, he is being selfish. If he just got off work, and shows reluctance to do a chore before he has a chance to take off his tie and have a glass of water, than he is probably just tired. And reluctance can be a very vague measure. As an introvert, I know a lot of people often assign emotion to me based on things they interpret, that I did not mean, and never would mean. Sometimes thing can be over analyzed. I hope my answer was nuanced enough for you.smile

Dec 30th 2012 new

(Quote) Lina-796057 said: And if a woman asks a man to do a couple of tasks for her (small things, not painting the house or...
(Quote) Lina-796057 said:

And if a woman asks a man to do a couple of tasks for her (small things, not painting the house or digging up the yard or anything like that!), and he either shows resentment or reluctance when he does them, or he doesn't ever do them--is it safe to say that he's a selfish jerk...I mean, that he's not dating the woman for the right reasons?

--hide--


Sorry, Linda, I thought I selected reply and quote for my above post.

Dec 30th 2012 new

(Quote) Tanya-906422 said: How about...I have everything I need. What I want from a man is to share my life and love;...
(Quote) Tanya-906422 said:

How about...I have everything I need.

What I want from a man is to share my life and love; and to do things for me because he wants to, not because I ask him too.

There are plenty of men that want to buy things and do things for me but what I want they seem to struggle with:

Love and Friendship. Is it inherently wrong to NOT have expectations? The more you expect the more chance you take of being let down. Lets face it, you can't make someone want or need you in return, or behave the way you want them too - right?

I feel like I think too differently from others sometimes, so I apologize if my responses seem odd.

--hide--



Hi Tanya! I had this very same issue with my last boyfriend. He kept wanting to buy me things. Although sweet, I would tell him that what I really wanted was to be treated with kindness and respect. In the end, we broke up because of it (and other reasons). Of course, I enjoy receiving flowers and being given gifts as much as the next girl, but if it's instead of being treated well....well, there's just no comparison. Chelle

Dec 31st 2012 new

"What if we give you our number, you never call us but continue to send messages?"

Send me your number & I'll share my thoughts by email. stir the pot! Its getting cold! cool hyper laughing eyepopping duck Bow wave

Dec 31st 2012 new

To be honest I think we show men that we need them if we stand back sometimes and allow them to take charge,then show them appreciation afterwards.

Posts 111 - 120 of 154