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Dec 30th 2012 new

(Quote) Elizabeth-462557 said: I am so glad to see y'all posting again. I have avoided this room to avoid any new attack...
(Quote) Elizabeth-462557 said:

I am so glad to see y'all posting again. I have avoided this room to avoid any new attacks. This is only the second time in my 59 years that I have been alone between Christmas and New Year's. I'm keeping a stiff upper lip and most of the time I am managing the silence. David's birthday is New Year's day. You would think that after 6 years, I wouldn't even think about it. If I were single because of divorce, I suppose New Year's Day would be different for me and truly I am not sure what it does mean now. I no longer wear my wedding ring and I have accepted the fact that I am single. What a shock that was. Oddly enough it took me 4 years before I wrapped my head around that one. I, too, pray to David and am thankful that he is praying for me and our children. But I am also very hopeful that one New Year's Eve in the future I will be dancing with a new love of my life.


The pain that we, both widows and widowers alike, feel is wrapped up in so many emotions. It can be a private anguish of mixed up feelings. I am thankful that I am able to read your stories and be comforted by the knowledge that I am, at least, semi-normal. And, my heart is mindful of the difficult road we walk. I am praying with you all that we can find the peace and the joy God surely has in mind for each of us. And, I am thankful for the private messages some of us have shared since the last postings that caused us to be wary of posting in this room.


- Elizabeth


PS So far, so good. no new attacks. maybe we can keep posting.



--hide--


There is definitely an understanding in this club we didn't ask to be a part of. I will be praying for you on Tuesday, Elizabeth. Do you do anything special to commemorate the day? My husband's birthday is Jan. 7th. Although easier, it still causes me to pause and think of him.

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Dec 30th 2012 new

(Quote) Kathy-635104 said: There is definitely an understanding in this club we didn't ask to be a part of. I wi...
(Quote) Kathy-635104 said:



There is definitely an understanding in this club we didn't ask to be a part of. I will be praying for you on Tuesday, Elizabeth. Do you do anything special to commemorate the day? My husband's birthday is Jan. 7th. Although easier, it still causes me to pause and think of him.

--hide--


Usually I am not alone and I just enjoy whichever child or children are with me. We really have fun when we are together. I am sure at least one of my children will call. If I were a betting person, I would bet on my middle daughter calling for sure.


For the past 6 years, I have come up with a plan for the new year on New Year's Eve...something that will move me on to what God has in mind for me. I still haven't come up with that this year. I may go back to my second year plan of finding things to be joyful about. I am sure I will think of David on Tuesday and the joy he gave me and left for me in our children. I know he would want me to find happiness in life and that is comforting.


Thank you for your prayers, Kathy. I do feel very blessed to be part of the CM family and know so many of us are praying for each other.


- Elizabeth

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Dec 30th 2012 new

(Quote) Elizabeth-462557 said: I am so glad to see y'all posting again. I have avoided this room to avoid any new attack...
(Quote) Elizabeth-462557 said:

I am so glad to see y'all posting again. I have avoided this room to avoid any new attacks. This is only the second time in my 59 years that I have been alone between Christmas and New Year's. I'm keeping a stiff upper lip and most of the time I am managing the silence. David's birthday is New Year's day. You would think that after 6 years, I wouldn't even think about it. If I were single because of divorce, I suppose New Year's Day would be different for me and truly I am not sure what it does mean now. I no longer wear my wedding ring and I have accepted the fact that I am single. What a shock that was. Oddly enough it took me 4 years before I wrapped my head around that one. I, too, pray to David and am thankful that he is praying for me and our children. But I am also very hopeful that one New Year's Eve in the future I will be dancing with a new love of my life.


The pain that we, both widows and widowers alike, feel is wrapped up in so many emotions. It can be a private anguish of mixed up feelings. I am thankful that I am able to read your stories and be comforted by the knowledge that I am, at least, semi-normal. And, my heart is mindful of the difficult road we walk. I am praying with you all that we can find the peace and the joy God surely has in mind for each of us. And, I am thankful for the private messages some of us have shared since the last postings that caused us to be wary of posting in this room.


- Elizabeth


PS So far, so good. no new attacks. maybe we can keep posting.



--hide--
Dear Sweet Elizabeth, hug

Know that you will be in my prayers on New Year's day, as you and all here are continually in them. I always feel a sigh of relief when the holidays are over. I seem to go on auto pilot starting on Nov. 15th (day of Bob's passing) until after the New Year. There's a numbness that comes over me and I just try to get through the days. With God's grace and mercy I've come this far. Praying

LOCKED
Dec 30th 2012 new

I do find the Holidays to be a very hard time as well. My boys get so excited and I just kind of get through all of this the best I can. January will mark 5 years for me. Sometimes it seems like a minute ago and sometimes I find it hard to remember anything.


Elizabeth I will be saying a prayer for you as well on New Year's Day. Birthdays, Anniversaries, etc are very hard.


I am throwing my annual New Years Eve party. My house is going to be filled with my boys friends-I love having a house full of noise and kids and just people running around. We will all go outside and scream Happy New Year!!


I am hopeful for the new year. I have really enjoyed meeting some new people here in this forum. I hope everyone can continue to post. It has been so helpful to talk to others in a similar situation.


LOCKED
Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) Theresa-637436 said: Just a few questions I guess. For one I find it very odd that I keep getting sent matches that ...
(Quote) Theresa-637436 said:

Just a few questions I guess. For one I find it very odd that I keep getting sent matches that live out of state. I said in my profile that I am staying here in St. Louis. Also, a lot of out of state people or even out of the country people are looking at my profile-I guess I just find it odd because I am only searching within a driving distance.


The other thing I am kind of wondering is why are non widows/widowers posting on this forum? I feel like there are very specific issues that we face. I was really looking forward to being honest about how I feel but I really do not need someone divorced coming in here and high jacking my posts saying that their loss is just as hard. It is not an issue of who has it harder-it is an issue of looking for some support from those that have walked this path after losing a spouse. I really look to the support of other widows/widowers because most of the grief support groups are for much older people and not necessarily just for the loss of a spouse.


Just some random thoughts thats all.

--hide--
As Victor explained, the searches are generated by CM's computer system, which is being tweaked yet. Stay tuned....

The barring of others from nearly any room is discouraging. We welcome thoughts and opinions of others even if they don't exactly fit into the respective room theme. You will find support from a good number of widowed people, certainly; but there are others who are just as qualified to speak on the subject. Their experience may be indirect, but just as valuable and valued. You'll find you have thoughts to offer in the over 45 room, for example.

By and large, you'll encounter well-meaning people, no matter what their status is. I don't look at it as highjacking, but rather a sincere effort to be supportive. There's no reason to hold-back your thoughts just because others might comment. Overall, contributions by the membership at large have proven to be appreciated and appropriate to various topics.

As far as views of your profile are concerned, there are people in different states, even countries, who might be interested in learning a little bit about you after seeing something in your profile. Others have a wide network for their searches; a few members might not have any geographical limitations at all. Even if there's distance involved, a person viewing you from afar might be aware of a potentially good match close to you. You just never know.....

Keep in mind you are free to do the same, as a paying member.

LOCKED
Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) Elizabeth-462557 said: I am so glad to see y'all posting again. I have avoided this room to avoid any new attack...
(Quote) Elizabeth-462557 said:

I am so glad to see y'all posting again. I have avoided this room to avoid any new attacks. This is only the second time in my 59 years that I have been alone between Christmas and New Year's. I'm keeping a stiff upper lip and most of the time I am managing the silence. David's birthday is New Year's day. You would think that after 6 years, I wouldn't even think about it. If I were single because of divorce, I suppose New Year's Day would be different for me and truly I am not sure what it does mean now. I no longer wear my wedding ring and I have accepted the fact that I am single. What a shock that was. Oddly enough it took me 4 years before I wrapped my head around that one. I, too, pray to David and am thankful that he is praying for me and our children. But I am also very hopeful that one New Year's Eve in the future I will be dancing with a new love of my life.


The pain that we, both widows and widowers alike, feel is wrapped up in so many emotions. It can be a private anguish of mixed up feelings. I am thankful that I am able to read your stories and be comforted by the knowledge that I am, at least, semi-normal. And, my heart is mindful of the difficult road we walk. I am praying with you all that we can find the peace and the joy God surely has in mind for each of us. And, I am thankful for the private messages some of us have shared since the last postings that caused us to be wary of posting in this room.


- Elizabeth


PS So far, so good. no new attacks. maybe we can keep posting.



--hide--
Praying wink Elizabeth, you will also have my prayers on New Year's Day. I agree with Theresa that special anniversary dates can be challenging...Group hugs! hug hug hug hug

scratchchin Ya know....as a thought, all four of your ladies are located in fairly close proximity of one another....perhaps a CM older gals' meet/greet would be a good way to share with one another in the future... .I might even arrange a flight back there... wink

LOCKED
Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) Elizabeth-462557 said: I am so glad to see y'all posting again. I have avoided this room to avoid any new attack...
(Quote) Elizabeth-462557 said:

I am so glad to see y'all posting again. I have avoided this room to avoid any new attacks. This is only the second time in my 59 years that I have been alone between Christmas and New Year's. I'm keeping a stiff upper lip and most of the time I am managing the silence. David's birthday is New Year's day. You would think that after 6 years, I wouldn't even think about it. If I were single because of divorce, I suppose New Year's Day would be different for me and truly I am not sure what it does mean now. I no longer wear my wedding ring and I have accepted the fact that I am single. What a shock that was. Oddly enough it took me 4 years before I wrapped my head around that one. I, too, pray to David and am thankful that he is praying for me and our children. But I am also very hopeful that one New Year's Eve in the future I will be dancing with a new love of my life.


The pain that we, both widows and widowers alike, feel is wrapped up in so many emotions. It can be a private anguish of mixed up feelings. I am thankful that I am able to read your stories and be comforted by the knowledge that I am, at least, semi-normal. And, my heart is mindful of the difficult road we walk. I am praying with you all that we can find the peace and the joy God surely has in mind for each of us. And, I am thankful for the private messages some of us have shared since the last postings that caused us to be wary of posting in this room.


- Elizabeth


PS So far, so good. no new attacks. maybe we can keep posting.



--hide--


Hello Elizabeth, I will say a prayer for you and David on New Year's Day. Jan 01 is also a special day for our family. Christian and I were married on Jan 01 - it was the spectacular New Year's ball that she always dreamed of for her wedding day, and I was honored to share this with her. This would mark our 18th anniversary. Our New Year's Eve tradition, before children, was a special few days away at a B&B. Once the children came along - truly a blessing - the celebration became an afternoon of feasting on wonderful foods prepared together, and then a romantic dinner that I would prepare as a special thank you. Then on came the dessers, some wine, and I would usually fall alseep by 11PM laughing


Anyway, the boys and I continue the tradition of a New Year's Eve party with many foods and sparkling grape juice, and I'm still asleep by 11PM.


Wishing you and your family Peace in 2013.

LOCKED
Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) Linda-624584 said: Dear Sweet Elizabeth, Know that you will be in my prayers on New Year's day, ...
(Quote) Linda-624584 said:

Dear Sweet Elizabeth,

Know that you will be in my prayers on New Year's day, as you and all here are continually in them. I always feel a sigh of relief when the holidays are over. I seem to go on auto pilot starting on Nov. 15th (day of Bob's passing) until after the New Year. There's a numbness that comes over me and I just try to get through the days. With God's grace and mercy I've come this far.

--hide--


Thank you, Linda. We have missed your sweet smile and cheery posts the last few days. I know exactly what you mean about auto pilot. The last two years have not been near as bad as the first 4. Those first four years, it seemed that a week or so before November 4th, the day David died, until after March 10th, our anniversary, I had difficulty thinking... But the last two years have been so much better...which is probably why I missed the reason I was getting a bit antsy the last few days. Numbness seems to be the best way for me to get through these important days in David's life. I have seen my Dad do the same thing and my Mother has been gone over 20 years...and he now has a wonderful and sweet relationship with my Godmother...God has surely answered my prayers for both of them.


I, so appreciate your friendship Linda and the others I have been blessed with through CM. I continue to pray for you and all of us who have been left behind that God will bless us again with peace and joy.


- Elizabeth

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Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) Theresa-637436 said: I do find the Holidays to be a very hard time as well. My boys get so excited and I just kind o...
(Quote) Theresa-637436 said:

I do find the Holidays to be a very hard time as well. My boys get so excited and I just kind of get through all of this the best I can. January will mark 5 years for me. Sometimes it seems like a minute ago and sometimes I find it hard to remember anything.


Elizabeth I will be saying a prayer for you as well on New Year's Day. Birthdays, Anniversaries, etc are very hard.


I am throwing my annual New Years Eve party. My house is going to be filled with my boys friends-I love having a house full of noise and kids and just people running around. We will all go outside and scream Happy New Year!!


I am hopeful for the new year. I have really enjoyed meeting some new people here in this forum. I hope everyone can continue to post. It has been so helpful to talk to others in a similar situation.


--hide--


It sounds like tonight will be a lot of fun, Theresa. I had my granddaughter last year while her parents were in Afganistan. What fun it was to have Caiden and her friends around. Your post has encouraged me to make the trip down the mountain to mass tonight and go visit an older widow who doesn't get out much. I had planned to hibernate, but I am beginning to think that was not the best plan.


Thank you for your prayers. I am comforted by the kind thoughts and prayers of my friends both on and off of CM. I hope you will give us an update on your New Year's Eve party. It sounds like a lot of fun.


In Christ,


Elizabeth

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Dec 31st 2012 new

(Quote) Beverly-649723 said: Elizabeth, you will also have my prayers on New Year's Day. I agree with Theresa that speci...
(Quote) Beverly-649723 said:

Elizabeth, you will also have my prayers on New Year's Day. I agree with Theresa that special anniversary dates can be challenging...Group hugs!

Ya know....as a thought, all four of your ladies are located in fairly close proximity of one another....perhaps a CM older gals' meet/greet would be a good way to share with one another in the future... .I might even arrange a flight back there...

--hide--


Thank you, Beverly. I'm already feeling much better just reading through these posts. I think a CM older gals' meet/great would be a great idea. If we get one worked out, I hope you will arrange a flight. I am planning to attend a not so older meet/great in East Tennessee in January and really looking forward to it. hug hug hug


- Elizabeth

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