(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:
In my short time on CM, I have read a number of fora posts including a reference to "God...
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:
In my short time on CM, I have read a number of fora posts including a reference to "God's will." That you must be open to "God's will" in a match so you need to consider persons who perhaps do not have all the qualities you desire. Yet at the same time there have been posts stating that it's really up to you in regard to your qualifications regarding age, appearance, life experience. This seems to be doublespeak to me.
I have a much broader perspective now on God's will and discernment than I used to. I really think God's will is much more dynamic that it is often made out to be - and must be if we believe in human freedom. The fact is, all of us thwart God's will every day - it's called sin. So if we thwart God's will in little ways each day, what makes us think we're going to get it right in big decisions? I think God's will is that we learn how to LOVE during our time here on earth, and because we often screw up this plan for a good portion of our lives, He continues to place new ways to teach us to love in our path and hopefully we will embrace some of these and learn a little more about love during this journey called life.
I don't assume that we'll get it figured out here in this CM thread, since confusion over this was one of the reasons the whole Protestant Reformation happened, but maybe we can all get a fuller understanding for ourselves.
So what's your perspective on God's will?
The idea of doing God's will in finding a mate has merit. To translate that means we should be thoughtful in our discernment and use our free will and ability to think. I'm ok with the soulmate concept -- there are some whose relationship is extremely close and intense. Where my belief stops is that there is only one possible soulmate for a person. As many have discovered, there are other people who can be ideal mates and the relationship can be satisfying.
God's will should lead us to choose carefully and think of a relationship that will bring us closer to Him. If we can answer "Yes" to that, our confidence that we're doing the right thing is enhanced and confirmed. Our own free will should lead us to conform with His desire for us to help lead our mates to eternal salvation. That's the end goal.
If there is a person who would be an ideal spouse (or close to it), we need to prayerfully consider the possibility. Would it be wrong to reject that person and say "No"? It depends upon the reason for rejection. If it is for selfish reasons (He doesn't earn enough for my desired lifestyle; I want someone taller, for examples), then we should question whether or not we're following the Lord's will.
I won't and can't say such a rejection is sinful. There can be a difference between making a sinful decision or a stupid one. It's between that person and the Lord to settle.