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Devoted to discussion pertaining to those issues which are specifically relevant to people under 45. Topics must have a specific perspective of people in this age group for it to be on topic.

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Young Adults Ministry

Jan 3rd 2013 new

I am at the top end of being eligible to participate in Young Adults groups, but have decided I absolutely must begin to attend such a group at a local church.

A young lady I loosely "dated" shortly after arrival to Tampa after career loss and a move here from across the state attends. Things did not work out, and she is not talking. I was not ready to move forward with a relationship so soon after a major change in life's circumstances. So I worry about rumors being spread about me before I'm even able to integrate in the group.

Would appreciate thoughts on how to proceed. It strikes me as odd that someone would be so hurt, when I'd indicated all along I was seeking only friendship due to my newness to the area, that they won't communicate. She has since found someone else (at the young adults group!), and I'm happy for her.

Appreciate any thoughts. Blessings,


Jan 3rd 2013 new

It is a bit odd, but maybe she just felt awkward. I would say attend anyway. I do know from my Young Adult group back home that sometimes the older men were really nice but the women in their early to mid 20's felt uncomfortable if they were hit on by them. Just my two cents, but I would say go make some friends and who knows maybe the future Mrs. 780154 will be there!

Jan 3rd 2013 new
Sometimes we women tend to fall for guys... Even when we know they only want friendship. We distance ourselves to help us deal with the loss of our unfulfilled hopes. You were honest... Her emotions got the best of her... Give her space... Let people get to know you and don't worry about what "might" have been said.
Feb 13th 2013 new

If she's found someone else, it won't stay awkward for too much longer. She's getting over it, at least enough to function, which is all you need.

My ex-boyfriend and I work in youth ministry together. I'm actually poised to become his boss. And it was awkward being around each other at first, I'll admit. Especially because he's still hurt (I broke up with him more than a year ago). But it got easier. We're pretty much good friends now.

If you take the high road and wait for her to be ready to talk to you, you'll be fine. No one else in the group should resent you for your history. That's like, middle school stuff. Give them a chance to suprise you.

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