Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.
Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael
Eileen, I really liked what you said about true beauty! Perfect.
I think this is an issue that is a concern for both men and women. Attraction and physical chemistry can certainly be affected by a myriad of factors and there is no denying this. But how many relationships start with the hormones blazing only to end with smoldering embers because important qualifiers like a sense of humor, character, intelligence and ones faith eventually rise to the surface and snuff out the relationship? I think we have to recognize these physical factors we find attractive, yet find the strength to not give in to them until the entire person has proven to meet a larger standard. Even the strongest of Christians are prone to these desires as they are both psychological and physiological in nature. So let's not fool ourselves by thinking our faith can trump this initially. But this is where our faith becomes invaluable. We have the ability to use discernment and time to truly evaluate the kind of person we are dating and if he/she is the complete package. How many times have we seen men/women who are drop-dead handsome/gorgeous with people of the opposite sex that made us shake our head wondering how he/she could be with someone nowhere near as attractive? It usually takes time to get to know and truly appreciate another person, so the key in my mind is to not rush things. And I am certainly not speaking for the bully pulpit here, but from experience as I have often led with chemistry which tended to cloud me from the other charteristics I truly wanted and valued. The result was either a sinful relationship or one that did nothing but be a bump in the road to finding someone I was truly compatible with. Hence, being on this site, unmarried and still striving to find that special one. We often spend less time evaluating a new relationship than buying a car! LOL! I feel for Richard because we live in an ever-increasingly shallow environment where things like love, character, sense of humor and spirituality get lost in the physical assault of the senses that conspire to make us slaves to instant gratification and a feeling that beauty is only to found from hormonal inklings. God made us all to deserve love and give love and desires that for us. So Richard, first know your real value and don't let the capricious and shallow values that society promotes keep you down.