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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
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Living the Blessed Life

Jan 10th 2013 new

My heart aches for the number of discouraged souls who've posted in the past few days. I can certainly relate, but I enjoy my life so much right now that finding a spouse would be an additional blessing, not an answer. I would like to know your thoughts on how to stay positive - or how to live life as a blessing?

I'll start - I focus on being grateful - always remembering all the blessings in my life, the ways God was worked to heal me and bring me to the place of JOY I am at now. I also focus on being fully present to and living each day as a gift.

Jan 10th 2013 new

Hi Kristen! I try to stay positive by counting my blessings, too. Even at my worst, I am better than most; I am very thankful for that! I listen to inspirational CDs and messages, and I pray daily. I also try to fill my life with positive people and watch the amount that I complain to others. Personally, I think happiness is a choice. I choose it each morning before I get out of bed, and I re-choose it throughout the day. Chelle

Jan 10th 2013 new

(Quote) Chelle-924354 said: Personally, I think happiness is a choice.
(Quote) Chelle-924354 said:

Personally, I think happiness is a choice.

--hide--

Abraham Lincoln said people are as happy as they decide to be.

Jan 11th 2013 new

(Quote) Kristen-878108 said: My heart aches for the number of discouraged souls who've posted in the past few days. I ca...
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:

My heart aches for the number of discouraged souls who've posted in the past few days. I can certainly relate, but I enjoy my life so much right now that finding a spouse would be an additional blessing, not an answer. I would like to know your thoughts on how to stay positive - or how to live life as a blessing?

I'll start - I focus on being grateful - always remembering all the blessings in my life, the ways God was worked to heal me and bring me to the place of JOY I am at now. I also focus on being fully present to and living each day as a gift.

--hide--


You are a very diverse person Kristen, from God's will, to flirting, to a blessed life... I can see the JOY. flower

Here's one of my favorite videos, I shared it once before somewhere. How to be Happy - youtu.be

Trying to keep God first helps me.

And in hard times when I'm grumpy - I put an object in my pocket that reminds me of the plank in my eye.

Jan 11th 2013 new
Yes gratitude Kristen, you said it. That and lots of prayer. Our Lady is important in my life. St. Joseph too. Those are some of what I try to focus on.
Jan 11th 2013 new

(Quote) Kristen-878108 said: My heart aches for the number of discouraged souls who've posted in the past few days. I ca...
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:

My heart aches for the number of discouraged souls who've posted in the past few days. I can certainly relate, but I enjoy my life so much right now that finding a spouse would be an additional blessing, not an answer. I would like to know your thoughts on how to stay positive - or how to live life as a blessing?

I'll start - I focus on being grateful - always remembering all the blessings in my life, the ways God was worked to heal me and bring me to the place of JOY I am at now. I also focus on being fully present to and living each day as a gift.

--hide--
You, Chelle, and Bob have good insights. First of all, if we think of the Mass, a part of it is intended to give thanks for what we have, remembering it did not come from us, or others, but from Him. This is how we should begin each day or at least devote some time to this way of thinking during the day, or even several times.

There are a number of people in this world who are genuinely hurting, including some of our sister and brother CM members. But...we're still here which indicates we have a purpose to fulfill. Sometimes our wounds are self-inflicted, or self-induced, and our focus is upon our hurts and wants, rather than we we've been given. We need to see beyond that. No -- I didn't say it's always easy to do that.

It's amazing how people who have nothing or very little cling intensely to their faith -- believing that the Good Lord will see them through their miseries. I see this happening with homeless people right in our back yard. There's an inner strength by which they pull through day by day.

You hit upon a thought that some people should bear in mind: "finding a spouse would be an additional blessing, not an answer." While it's true that a spouse could ease some people's burdens and would be a blessing, it's their own fortitude that keeps them going on their own, as difficult as life's problems might be. You need to be at your best in order to be a good mate. One needs to be ready to accept what's involved in marriage -- giving, not taking.

It's easier to say this during good times, but, if done often enough, we can say it when rough times hit. If we have a bad day, most assuredly the sun will still come up tomorrow. Use part of the day to serve others, which can be done through prayer and other assistance when possible. It adds meaning and purpose to your own life.

Jan 11th 2013 new

(Quote) Andrea-368827 said: You are a very diverse person Kristen, from God's will, to flirting, to a bless...
(Quote) Andrea-368827 said:


You are a very diverse person Kristen, from God's will, to flirting, to a blessed life... I can see the JOY.

Here's one of my favorite videos, I shared it once before somewhere. How to be Happy - youtu.be

Trying to keep God first helps me.

And in hard times when I'm grumpy - I put an object in my pocket that reminds me of the plank in my eye.

--hide--
Andrea -- there's joy in flirting, for sure..... wink hug

Jan 11th 2013 new

I think the discouragements are normal -- places I still need to grow. ugh rolling eyes flower

Jan 11th 2013 new

(Quote) Kristen-878108 said: My heart aches for the number of discouraged souls who've posted in the past few days. I ca...
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:

My heart aches for the number of discouraged souls who've posted in the past few days. I can certainly relate, but I enjoy my life so much right now that finding a spouse would be an additional blessing, not an answer. I would like to know your thoughts on how to stay positive - or how to live life as a blessing?

I'll start - I focus on being grateful - always remembering all the blessings in my life, the ways God was worked to heal me and bring me to the place of JOY I am at now. I also focus on being fully present to and living each day as a gift.

--hide--

Well said Kristen. I feel the same way. There are natural moments or twinges for companionship that nauturally come especially after joining a dating site. wink However, when I step back I realize that God in his extreme mercy has me in a place that while a spouse would be a welcome addition, it is not a necessity or the only way that I can find fullfillment. Challenging to stay that way, yes but impossible, no. Focus on God and be encouraged everyone. He will and can bring joy even in the disappointment and discouragement.

I think my heart aches too as I know what it feels like to feel as they do. I think that anyone being truthful with themselves can. However, we need to get in the habit of taking it to the Lord. Remember my brothers and sisters that finding the spouse is only the beginning. That person will disappoint you at times no matter how perfect they are for you. In these moments of disappointment we can not crush them with our false expectations of their ability to be our source of fulfillment. God alone is that. Therefore, practicing to go to the Lord now in our disappointments in the single life will make us a better spouse in the married life. Married life is hard and not perfect even under the best of circumstances. It is a consolation and a refiner's fire at the same time.A refiner's fire that is preparing us for God.

Kristen is right. Learn to cling to God.

Jan 11th 2013 new

(Quote) Shara-929649 said: Well said Kristen. I feel the same way. There are natural moments or twinges for compani...
(Quote) Shara-929649 said:

Well said Kristen. I feel the same way. There are natural moments or twinges for companionship that nauturally come especially after joining a dating site. However, when I step back I realize that God in his extreme mercy has me in a place that while a spouse would be a welcome addition, it is not a necessity or the only way that I can find fullfillment. Challenging to stay that way, yes but impossible, no. Focus on God and be encouraged everyone. He will and can bring joy even in the disappointment and discouragement.

I think my heart aches too as I know what it feels like to feel as they do. I think that anyone being truthful with themselves can. However, we need to get in the habit of taking it to the Lord. Remember my brothers and sisters that finding the spouse is only the beginning. That person will disappoint you at times no matter how perfect they are for you. In these moments of disappointment we can not crush them with our false expectations of their ability to be our source of fulfillment. God alone is that. Therefore, practicing to go to the Lord now in our disappointments in the single life will make us a better spouse in the married life. Married life is hard and not perfect even under the best of circumstances. It is a consolation and a refiner's fire at the same time.A refiner's fire that is preparing us for God.

Kristen is right. Learn to cling to God.

--hide--

Wow - great posts! heart

I agree - we ALL have the ability to make the choice to be happy, make the choice to live a full live whether with someone or not, make the choice to look on the bright side of things, find that silver lining, say positive things rather than negative. biggrin Shara really had a good point that deserves a second look:

we can not crush (our special someone) with OUR false expectations of THEIR ability to be OUR source of fulfillment. GOD ALONE IS THAT!


People are naturally drawn to happy people. Negativity breeds negativity, which just brings us down further. Surround yourself with positive people who truly are happy - not because of you - but because of what is inside of them, all on their own. If they are happy WITH you too - well that's just a wonderful bonus.

Make that choice to focus on all of the blessings He has given you - there are MANY, and plenty more to see every single day.

Great topic, Kristen! hug (Goodness knows we can use more uplifting threads!) wink

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