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Saint Thomas More was martyred during the Protestant Reformation for standing firm in the Faith and not recognizing the King of England as the Supreme Head of the Church.
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I read a story from Sylvia Plath's The Bell Jar many years ago that I recently looked up (do not recommend the book - a real downer). But the story she tells is about a fig tree heavy with fruit - each fruit represents a different life choice for her. She hesitates in choosing a fruit, for she knows if she selects one, she by default rejects the rest. But because of hestitation, eventually all the fruit overripens and falls off and she is left with nothing.

The moral of the story: making a choice results in the elimination of other choices. Are there people out there who fear commitment for this reason? And has this fear caused you to miss some opportunities for love? I often think about this paradox - that in order to really grow, one must limit oneself by choosing a specific path, entering deeply into this choice in order to learn how to love. I know this is a really heavy topic, but is important to address in a culture that wants us to buy into the illusion of infinite choice. And sometimes we might decide to choose, only to be disappointed with our choice later on - how do we renew our ability to learn how to love in these situations of disappointment? Looking forward to some deep discussion!

Jan 15th 2013 new

This has to be at work in online dating.. There are new profiles uploaded every day.. They choices are so many, that many end up making no choice whatsoever..

Jan 15th 2013 new

(Quote) Kristen-878108 said: I read a story from Sylvia Plath's The Bell Jar many years ago that I recently loo...
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:

I read a story from Sylvia Plath's The Bell Jar many years ago that I recently looked up (do not recommend the book - a real downer). But the story she tells is about a fig tree heavy with fruit - each fruit represents a different life choice for her. She hesitates in choosing a fruit, for she knows if she selects one, she by default rejects the rest. But because of hestitation, eventually all the fruit overripens and falls off and she is left with nothing.

The moral of the story: making a choice results in the elimination of other choices. Are there people out there who fear commitment for this reason? And has this fear caused you to miss some opportunities for love? I often think about this paradox - that in order to really grow, one must limit oneself by choosing a specific path, entering deeply into this choice in order to learn how to love. I know this is a really heavy topic, but is important to address in a culture that wants us to buy into the illusion of infinite choice. And sometimes we might decide to choose, only to be disappointed with our choice later on - how do we renew our ability to learn how to love in these situations of disappointment? Looking forward to some deep discussion!

--hide--


THIS is Brilliant! Thank you!

Jan 15th 2013 new

(Quote) Donna-83441 said: This has to be at work in online dating.. There are new profiles uploaded every day.. They choices...
(Quote) Donna-83441 said:

This has to be at work in online dating.. There are new profiles uploaded every day.. They choices are so many, that many end up making no choice whatsoever..

--hide--


It's infinitely easier than it seems if you allow prayer and an educated choice to assist your selection process. If your heart and your intentions are sincere, then there will be smooth sailing. This theory presupposes reciprocation. If your selection is continually looking back at the tree and all the other figs and wondering if THEIR choice was the right one. Then, you're done.

Jan 15th 2013 new

Interesting post Kristen, and I think very relevant! Our culture is so much about being #1, having the "freedom" to choose what you want, when you want and how you want. Yet, things are constantly changing...I'm not that old, but I'm amazed at how much the culture has changed from when I was a teen to what our teens and early 20-somethings deal with. Things are always in flux and there are so many options to choose from. I feel like for many of us it can be overwhelming because since you can choose anything you want there is an underlying pressure that makes you feel that the choice you make has to be the "perfect" one. And that can cause plenty of wavering and second-guessing.

Jan 15th 2013 new

(Quote) Donnie-397050 said:   It's infinitely easier than it seems if you allow prayer and an educated c...
(Quote) Donnie-397050 said:

 


It's infinitely easier than it seems if you allow prayer and an educated choice to assist your selection process. If your heart and your intentions are sincere, then there will be smooth sailing. This theory presupposes reciprocation. If your selection is continually looking back at the tree and all the other figs and wondering if THEIR choice was the right one. Then, you're done.

--hide--


Maybe the right fig has been in front of us the whole time and we just never knew. But then, what do I know? scratchchin

Jan 15th 2013 new

(Quote) Kristen-878108 said: I read a story from Sylvia Plath's The Bell Jar many years ago that I recently loo...
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:

I read a story from Sylvia Plath's The Bell Jar many years ago that I recently looked up (do not recommend the book - a real downer). But the story she tells is about a fig tree heavy with fruit - each fruit represents a different life choice for her. She hesitates in choosing a fruit, for she knows if she selects one, she by default rejects the rest. But because of hestitation, eventually all the fruit overripens and falls off and she is left with nothing.

The moral of the story: making a choice results in the elimination of other choices. Are there people out there who fear commitment for this reason? And has this fear caused you to miss some opportunities for love? I often think about this paradox - that in order to really grow, one must limit oneself by choosing a specific path, entering deeply into this choice in order to learn how to love. I know this is a really heavy topic, but is important to address in a culture that wants us to buy into the illusion of infinite choice. And sometimes we might decide to choose, only to be disappointed with our choice later on - how do we renew our ability to learn how to love in these situations of disappointment? Looking forward to some deep discussion!

--hide--


One thing I want to make clear after rereading my original post - I hope no one out there reads this and assumes this is me fingerpointing at someone else...this is me pondering my own decisions in life - sometimes I wonder if I have been so enamored with all the choices before me that I have been distracted from selecting - in terms of vocation, education, career, etc. But the older I get, the more I understand the importance of choosing and entering deeply into that choice for the purpose of growth.

Jan 15th 2013 new

(Quote) Donnie-397050 said: It's infinitely easier than it seems if you allow prayer and an educated choice...
(Quote) Donnie-397050 said:


It's infinitely easier than it seems if you allow prayer and an educated choice to assist your selection process. If your heart and your intentions are sincere, then there will be smooth sailing. This theory presupposes reciprocation. If your selection is continually looking back at the tree and all the other figs and wondering if THEIR choice was the right one. Then, you're done.

--hide--


Totally agree with this - that's where I think once you make the choice, the best thing to do is to go forward with it and stop thinking about whether the choice was correct - the point is the choice was made.

Jan 15th 2013 new

(Quote) Jessica-766671 said: Interesting post Kristen, and I think very relevant! Our culture is so much about being #1, hav...
(Quote) Jessica-766671 said:

Interesting post Kristen, and I think very relevant! Our culture is so much about being #1, having the "freedom" to choose what you want, when you want and how you want. Yet, things are constantly changing...I'm not that old, but I'm amazed at how much the culture has changed from when I was a teen to what our teens and early 20-somethings deal with. Things are always in flux and there are so many options to choose from. I feel like for many of us it can be overwhelming because since you can choose anything you want there is an underlying pressure that makes you feel that the choice you make has to be the "perfect" one. And that can cause plenty of wavering and second-guessing.

--hide--


Yes! All this emphasis on the "perfect choice" bogs down the living of life! I think about how they chose each other from a very limited pool of people in their rural small town and made a life - and are happy. An increase in choices does not always yield to greater happiness.

Jan 15th 2013 new

(Quote) Kristen-878108 said: I read a story from Sylvia Plath's The Bell Jar many years ago that I recently loo...
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:

I read a story from Sylvia Plath's The Bell Jar many years ago that I recently looked up (do not recommend the book - a real downer). But the story she tells is about a fig tree heavy with fruit - each fruit represents a different life choice for her. She hesitates in choosing a fruit, for she knows if she selects one, she by default rejects the rest. But because of hestitation, eventually all the fruit overripens and falls off and she is left with nothing.

The moral of the story: making a choice results in the elimination of other choices. Are there people out there who fear commitment for this reason? And has this fear caused you to miss some opportunities for love? I often think about this paradox - that in order to really grow, one must limit oneself by choosing a specific path, entering deeply into this choice in order to learn how to love. I know this is a really heavy topic, but is important to address in a culture that wants us to buy into the illusion of infinite choice. And sometimes we might decide to choose, only to be disappointed with our choice later on - how do we renew our ability to learn how to love in these situations of disappointment? Looking forward to some deep discussion!

--hide--


I will try to return to lighter topics like flirting after this! I was just thinking about this topic and wondered if anyone else felt the same.

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