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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Jan 22nd 2013 new
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said: Nice article. Thanks Brian.
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:




Nice article. Thanks Brian.

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I agree that was a nice article -- thanks Brian!
Jan 22nd 2013 new

(Quote) Brian-278516 said:Learning A Lesson From Manti Te’o's Fake Girlfriend www.catholicmatch.com.
(Quote) Brian-278516 said:Learning A Lesson From Manti Te’o's Fake Girlfriend

www.catholicmatch.com

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Honestly these stories are pretty scary to me, especially with regards to my personality. I tend to trust people unless given a reason to do otherwise. ( that's what we are taught to do in Catholic school) Therefore I look at this story and think that there is a possiblity that this could be me. The only thing I do not understand is how long the relationship went with no phone call or physical interaction when they did not live that far apart. That, I do not think that I could do or allow. It is definitely harder for a woman IMO as I see it as a man's role to take the initiative to move a relationship to the next level. However, I think that if I was interacting regularly with someone for a period of time greater than two weeks and he had never taken the initiative to ask for my phone number or even at least skype that I would take it as a sign that the relationship was not something that he was serious about exploring or wanting to pursue further.

I guess what I will take from this is to be cautious while open as I certainly would not want to change who I am completely. However, like I said very scary to think about. I think that anyone who could do that to another person without regard for that's person's emotions and or their dignity, is pretty cold, heartless and has some serious issues.

Jan 22nd 2013 new

I am personally jaded on long distance romance. Spending more time on the phone than with each other. How does anyone know what is real. Years and years ago, I talked to a man who said he didn't have any way to get a picture online. I believed this one time. After about 6 months of phone calls, we had the opportunity to meet. We met. There was no chemistry and he lied about smoking - he smoked, which is one of my pet peeves. Never again.

On the other hand, so many people fall for this "catfish" thing because they want to believe it. I know it sounds negative, but how many stories do people have to hear before they get it? I believe everyone does want to be loved, but don't fall hook, line and sinker.

Yes, it is OK to meet online, but meet the person as soon as possible.

Jan 22nd 2013 new

(Quote) Carolyn-896104 said: I am personally jaded on long distance romance. Spending more time on the phone than with each ...
(Quote) Carolyn-896104 said:

I am personally jaded on long distance romance. Spending more time on the phone than with each other. How does anyone know what is real. Years and years ago, I talked to a man who said he didn't have any way to get a picture online. I believed this one time. After about 6 months of phone calls, we had the opportunity to meet. We met. There was no chemistry and he lied about smoking - he smoked, which is one of my pet peeves. Never again.

On the other hand, so many people fall for this "catfish" thing because they want to believe it. I know it sounds negative, but how many stories do people have to hear before they get it? I believe everyone does want to be loved, but don't fall hook, line and sinker.

Yes, it is OK to meet online, but meet the person as soon as possible.

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That is one of the reasons I think that skype is a helpful tool. You can learn a lot from someone's body language and eyes that is missed in messaging or even over the phone.

Jan 22nd 2013 new

Very good point Shara!

Jan 22nd 2013 new

(Quote) Bobbie-557829 said: Hard to say what happened.The Paper here locally has had a lot on him.I do believe he has to sa...
(Quote) Bobbie-557829 said: Hard to say what happened.The Paper here locally has had a lot on him.I do believe he has to

say something soon.He knew early part of Dec about it & didn't tell ND until the 24th or 25th.
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I would think that if he indeed did get duped that as a guy it would have been a severe blow to his ego and that it would be hard to admit that shame in public. It is hard enough to face our shameful mistakes in private but to have to live that out in the media would be my idea of hell.

Jan 22nd 2013 new

(Quote) Shara-929649 said: I would think that if he indeed did get duped that as a guy it would have been a severe ...
(Quote) Shara-929649 said:

I would think that if he indeed did get duped that as a guy it would have been a severe blow to his ego and that it would be hard to admit that shame in public. It is hard enough to face our shameful mistakes in private but to have to live that out in the media would be my idea of hell.

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If you think it's bad for Te'o now wait till he gets drafted! NFL locker rooms are rough for rookies as it is, but he's going to get treated a little extra special.



theheart

Jan 22nd 2013 new

(Quote) Shara-929649 said: I would think that if he indeed did get duped that as a guy it would have been a severe ...
(Quote) Shara-929649 said:

I would think that if he indeed did get duped that as a guy it would have been a severe blow to his ego and that it would be hard to admit that shame in public. It is hard enough to face our shameful mistakes in private but to have to live that out in the media would be my idea of hell.

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I'm pretty sure it would have been a blow to a woman's ego too - even though it's not his fault, we always tend to blame ourselves for our naiveté.

Jan 22nd 2013 new

(Quote) Kristen-878108 said: I'm pretty sure it would have been a blow to a woman's ego too - even thou...
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:


I'm pretty sure it would have been a blow to a woman's ego too - even though it's not his fault, we always tend to blame ourselves for our naiveté.

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That's my point exactly. Especially for someone of deep faith convictions we are taught to be naturally introspective by our faith. The shame of that situation would be very hard for most people to admit to their private circle or friends; farless the entire nation. So even though he was wrong to hide it, I can understand and have compassion for his desire to keep it hidden.

Jan 22nd 2013 new
(Quote) Jon-930321 said: If it turns out he was duped: The way I see it, he's a kid. He looks like a man, but he is...
(Quote) Jon-930321 said:

If it turns out he was duped:




The way I see it, he's a kid. He looks like a man, but he isn't. And he fell in love. Love is a heck-of-a-drug. You don't really reason when you are in love, you ignore warning signs, you go all in. He got burned in the process. If anyone out there had been in love, I'm sure you have probably had this happed to you at some point, in the sense that you ignored things and looked the other way, and it turned out badly. I'm sure he fibbed a little bit about meeting her because he didn't want the whole world to know that he was in an online relationship. Look at the guy! He could get any young girl at ND, so he was probably a bit embarrassed to really say what it was. It is still a bit taboo to say "we met online" to friends and family, and he is having to put it out to the world. Now it's out there and I bet all he wants to do is crawl into a cave and wait for it to blow over.




I feel bad for him; this happened to my sister. She found this guy online and everything changed in her. She started eating right, going out, losing a lot of weight. Turned out her "friend" made up a make believe guy, and killed him off. She was ready to drive four hours to a funeral before they finally told her. Turned her whole life upside down, and now says she is gay. I'm more of the belief that she got burned hard and her "girlfriend" was there when she was at her lowest. People should really think before they do something like this. It is just plain cruel.





If he was part of the ploy:





Wow...








Jon

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Jon, I hope one day your sister realizes that her so called friend had ulterior motives for making up that whole situation.
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