This is a great question, if only for prompting our own self-reflection on the topic. . Maybe it isn't the length of the checklist but the traits on the list, perhaps our list is too rigid? I offer this, because I do not believe there is a perfect mate, not from the beginning and not even after many many years of marriage. I've posted elsewhere about how I met my husband. What i didn't share there was the fact that no one on my side thought we would make it a year, lol. We came from very different backgrounds. He had no faith background and most of his family was actually very hostile to belief in God. But, we are called to be light to our spouses and hopefully through the marital union each grows more deeply in love, understanding and faith. My husband converted to Catholicism after we had been married for ten years. I never asked him to convert. I only asked him to attend Mass with me when we had several little ones to wrangle. I, of course, prayed for him to come to know God. And, he came to it on his own. And, I have to say, I learned many things from his faith journey and the things we shared.
I think so my point is this and I agree with Kristen on this, perhaps we should be less rigid in our initial assessments of someone's profile and instead interact with them a little more. I've read dozens of profiles, some made me grin, some made me laugh, some prompted no reaction good or bad, and a few prompted a flip in the tummy and an excitement that made me want to reach out and know more about the person. A few put me off fairly quickly. And, unless they like a lot of information, they will probably look at mine and groan.
But, I won't know if I like a person or not until I actually interact with them. And, it might very well be, that I really like the person and enjoy deep conversations with them, but feel no romantic spark. I welcome that, one can never have too many friends or too many good conversations.
That I think has actually been the best thing about this site for me. I have struggled with the quiet in my home now, the loss of good, deep conversations or even light and playful banter. I am starved for it actually, and so, finding this site and forums had a completely unexpected benefit for me, like a dehydrated sponge I am soaking up and immersing in the conversation and it soothes me tremendously. I am sure I will relax a bit once I am no longer so parched lol, but for now thank you all for stimulating ideas and thoughts and comments and discussion -- no matter what your profiles say