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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Jan 25th 2013 new

(Quote) Sarah-901988 said: I particularly liked how she talked about the "reverse equation". We sometimes think if...
(Quote) Sarah-901988 said:

I particularly liked how she talked about the "reverse equation". We sometimes think if I dress a certain way . . . then men will find me attractive . . . then I will be desirable . . . then I'll have worth. But reality is, if we know our worth that is what is truly attractive. Anyhow, I enjoyed lots of fresh perspectives on an important topic.

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This is the reason why it is so important for young girls to learn about their value and how to handle their femininity from their family and older women. Because when that information is provided primarily by the music and fashion industry the values given won't be beneficial to the young girl.

Jan 25th 2013 new

(Quote) Peter-933860 said: This is the reason why it is so important
(Quote) Peter-933860 said:

This is the reason why it is so important for young girls to learn about their value and how to handle their femininity from their family and older women. Because when that information is provided primarily by the music and fashion industry the values given won't be beneficial to the young girl.

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That is so true and I think that it is especially hard for attractive young women. The old adage that the prettiest girls are the most insecure is becoming increasingly true. They are constantly taught by society and the media that their value lies in being admired for physical things and not for what they are inside. The situation becomes even more chronic with every passing generation since women who do not understand their value are unable to pass that on to their children. Hence, we have a society of rampant promiscuity and of women who allow themselves to be treated as playthings as they so badly desire to be accepted and wanted or to feel worthy of something or someone. We have women who feel the need to flaunt themselves and adverstise their worth in the hopes of attracting someone; anyne. Rampant feminism which advocates a lack of self control and that self-destructive behavior is the key to true freedom and honor is killing authentic femininity in our society. Women do not see being an authentic woman as something to be prized. That the whole package of true femininity is the only way to truly value the woman as a whole. It is almost like we are developing a society of women that have to be retaught to love themselves as women.

The problem simultaneously extends to our men. Without strong leadership from the men in our families women are not exposed to authentic manhood and have this skewed view of what a good man is, wants and expects. They are taught that men are these weak spinless creatures who need to be protected from themselves. They are not taught the value of a good man who understands his worth and the worth of the women around him. They are not taught to value the leadership of a good man and also that it is something to be prized. They are not taught that a good man rather taking advantage of their femininity will see it as a treasure worth protecting and admiring. The character of the man driving purely by lust as basal desires has become so much more prevalent than the authentic man that woman are receiving a tainted view of men. It forces them to think that they need to take leadership in the family as the men around them are not capable. It forces them to think that authentic femininity will not be prized but seen as weakness and make them go unoticed in the chaos of this world.

These two glaring attacks are so detrimental to formation of meaningful relationships and of good strong families and is crushing our ability to pass the faith and true meaning of family to the next generation. It is so much more important today that we as Catholic women relearn what our worth is as women. As that complete package of authentic Catholic femininity. That we see the value in our role as women in dating and in the family. As Catholic men it is becoming so critical that good strong men begin to mentor the younger generation in authentic manhood through prayer and example. That way we can create a generation of authentic leaders capable of protecting the women in our families and if needed reteaching them how to view and value themselves as women of God.

I think that more and more I am coming to finally understand who I am as a woman and my true worth which is based solely in God and who he created me as and what he created me for. To basically relearn to love myself and find my worth outside of being valued by someone else. I am also beginning to realize the infinite value of a good, strong, holy, Catholic man in my life who is not afraid to lead me to Christ, not just to him. To lead and encourage me to begin to truly value myself as a complete woman who is worth it, not just because of him and his notice, but especially because I belong to God who is so wonderful and who loves me so much. So many of us having been tainted by the media and do not realize the extent of it until our brokeness becomes apparent in the way we value and position ourselves. Until we realize how much we put stock in being valued by others or being noticed by them. We truly need to turn towards God and his love which the only source of understanding who we are truly are as man and woman and our infinite worth because of him.

Jan 27th 2013 new
(Quote) Sarah-901988 said: I love this balanced and postitve view of modesty! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DojKFAMuzd0
(Quote) Sarah-901988 said:

I love this balanced and postitve view of modesty!



www.youtube.com



What do you think of this approach to modesty with those you date and how you dress yourself?





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I'm seeing more on EWTN where the different hosts are reminding men we are the knight-errants in the battle. Our role is to protect our families. We need to protect them because the devil is their #1 enemy and because Lucifer was the greatest angel created he had the most understanding of God's plan. Because the Virgin's birth was the start of his defeat Lucifer attacks women first.

Dressing in ways men are known weak is part of his attack, so yes men need help. Both genders are to help each other to heaven. The greatest love we can have for each other is to get others to heaven.

Dressing for herself to see her complete beauty complements what hit me in Advent. I started to remind and encourage people we are One of God's Most Beautiful Creations, OGMBC. We need to start acting like it! rosary
Jan 27th 2013 new
Modest dress.

How exciting would Christmas morning be if the gifts were not wrapped in paper?
Jan 27th 2013 new

I watch this video and it reminded me of this passage from

"Three To Get Married" by Archbishop Fulton Sheen www.ewtn.com

" It is a well-attested fact that those people who
are most impoverished in their souls try to cover up this inner
destitution by extreme luxury on the outside.

The more naked the soul, that is, the more devoid of virtue,
the greater the need of the body to give the appearance of possession
through fantastic dress, display, and ostentation.

The more the soul is clothed with virtue, the less is the need of outer compensation.
The poor boy who wishes to be known as rich must make a display of riches.
The boy who is really rich needs no such prop. "

Jan 27th 2013 new

(Quote) Sarah-901988 said: I love this balanced and postitve view of modesty! www.youtube.com.
(Quote) Sarah-901988 said:

I love this balanced and postitve view of modesty!

www.youtube.com

What do you think of this approach to modesty with those you date and how you dress yourself?

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Love this video - thank you for sharing it. This would be a great one to share with our high school girls during our summer Girls Retreat.

Jan 27th 2013 new

(Quote) Eric-44550 said: I watch this video and it reminded me of this passage from "Three To Get Marri...
(Quote) Eric-44550 said:

I watch this video and it reminded me of this passage from

"Three To Get Married" by Archbishop Fulton Sheen www.ewtn.com

" It is a well-attested fact that those people who
are most impoverished in their souls try to cover up this inner
destitution by extreme luxury on the outside.

The more naked the soul, that is, the more devoid of virtue,
the greater the need of the body to give the appearance of possession
through fantastic dress, display, and ostentation.

The more the soul is clothed with virtue, the less is the need of outer compensation.
The poor boy who wishes to be known as rich must make a display of riches.
The boy who is really rich needs no such prop. "

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Eric that is simply beautiful. biggrin

Jan 27th 2013 new

Both men and women need to consider modesty in how they dress. I'm sorry, but those young men who wear their pants so low that the tops of their underwear show are really, really sending the wrong message about themselves. Like, they have their pants half-off?? eyepopping wide eyed shocked Umm, no, that's in the same category as those women who have a little too much hanging out in the front or not enough covering the back end either.

Jan 28th 2013 new

(Quote) Sarah-901988 said: I love this balanced and postitve view of modesty! www.youtube.com.
(Quote) Sarah-901988 said:

I love this balanced and postitve view of modesty!

www.youtube.com

What do you think of this approach to modesty with those you date and how you dress yourself?

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Hi Sarah,


I could not get the video to work for me, but I wanted to make a couple of general comments on the subject. First, dressing modesty is not about protecting men, we are fully capable of taken responsibility for our own thoughts and actions. I mean, A man does not have an affair because his mistriss's showed to much leg, he has an affair because he is selfish and does not care about who he hurts.


I feel that women are beautiful and should not be ashamed of it or made to feel they need to cover themselves out of some sense of duty. "Modesty" for me is just dressing in a way that's shows you respect yourself, your dignity and your body.

Jan 28th 2013 new

(Quote) Justin-32820 said: Hi Sarah, I could not get the video to work for me, but I wanted to ...
(Quote) Justin-32820 said:

Hi Sarah,


I could not get the video to work for me, but I wanted to make a couple of general comments on the subject. First, dressing modesty is not about protecting men, we are fully capable of taken responsibility for our own thoughts and actions. I mean, A man does not have an affair because his mistriss's showed to much leg, he has an affair because he is selfish and does not care about who he hurts.


I feel that women are beautiful and should not be ashamed of it or made to feel they need to cover themselves out of some sense of duty. "Modesty" for me is just dressing in a way that's shows you respect yourself, your dignity and your body.

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Of course we are fully responsible for our actions. But since our testosterone levels are way higher and we have more receptors for testosterone as well, we are more sensitive towards its effects: higher sexual drive and aggressiveness, among others. Therefore I don't see it as wrong to say that we men are actually are in need of some help from women in not to triggers us. Myself for example, on a good day when I'm strong in spirit I'm immune to sexual temptations, period!. On a bad day, being weak in spirit, I can be very vulnerable. If women around me then are helping me by not dressing in a provocative manner they are part of the uplifting side and not the destructive side. Remember, we can be part of destructivness in so many ways without it being our intention.

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