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This room is for supportive and informative discussion about divorce and/or the annulment process. All posters must have been previously divorced or annulled.

Saint Eugene De Mazenod is patron of dysfunctional families & Saint Fabiola obtained a divorce from her first husband prior to devoting her life to charitable works.
Learn More: Saint Eugene De Mazenod and Saint Fabiola

Apr 23 new

Congrats to everyone who has received either their first or second decision. I received my first affirmative decision today and I'm not feeling any joy sad boggled I was so hoping that I would feel a wonderful mix of emotions but not so much. Divorce sucks! Thanks for letting me vent.

Apr 23 new
(Quote) Dana-782979 said: Congrats to everyone who has received either their first or second decision. I received my first affirmative dec...
(Quote) Dana-782979 said:

Congrats to everyone who has received either their first or second decision. I received my first affirmative decision today and I'm not feeling any joy I was so hoping that I would feel a wonderful mix of emotions but not so much. Divorce sucks! Thanks for letting me vent.

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Dana, I am sorry. Divorce is a tragedy. You are in my prayers. Praying
Apr 23 new

Thank you, Meg.

Apr 23 new

Divorce does suck! Agreed! Hopefully once everything is done & over with you will be able to start finding some peace. Hugs!

Apr 23 new

Congrats Laura! It is definitely a sigh of relief when its all over. Its not really about "if". It is about knowing what God wills. And an affirmation for us to know that our former marriages were never built on the right foundation... and in a sense, doomed to fail. And its pretty miraculous that some do survive having begun under the same circumstances.

As for me, I got my annullment last fall. And after 12 years of nothing. I really didn't know what to think anymore.

Now the question is, What does God want for my life now that I am free? Free to glorify him in a new marriage or glorify and witness as a single person. Sometimes I feel like, "Great, I'm annulled. Now what? I am a single mother of 4 children, in my mid 40's . Does God want me to marry again? What about children, can I really have more? Should I have more? There are so many purposes of marriage, can I do this again... for the first time for real??; Is it my selfish desire for a companion/spouse/partner/_______, or has God planted that desire for me?"


So many questions.

Apr 24 new
(Quote) Mercedes-627777 said: Hi Christina, thank you very much for your input. Although I would like to get an annulment, I have to thread t...
(Quote) Mercedes-627777 said: Hi Christina, thank you very much for your input. Although I would like to get an annulment, I have to thread those steps very carefully because my ex is an a very abusive man. I do not fear him but I do fear my children's reaction. They are all very traumatized and scarred by the divorce, the brainwash and the desintegration of what it just to be a precious, devout family. I am the only one who has remained close to Our Lord after the divorce. My faith has to be stronger than ever. But you are right. I am going to schedule a meeting with my priest and ask for his guidance. Can you expand why do you say that the emotional and espiritual rewards have been so worth it for you? How do you feel afterwards? Any body else want to comment? Mercy
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Well, for me it has to do with whether or not I am still married to my spouse. Until the Church decides whether or not a Sacramental marriage took place at the time of our vows, I am married to a man that I am not living with and do not see. It is a very weird feeling...to be married but to be alone; it has been quite awhile now so I don't feel married but I can't operate off that. Marriage is a Sacrament so it is not about the civil divorce but about the annulment and my feelings don't matter regarding my state. It feels like limbo and I don't like the indecisiveness of it all. I want to know. Was/am I married or not? Did a Sacramental marriage exist? I believe not, based on the Canon Law I have read or I would not have applied for an annulment. I am not looking for a loophole and would not seek something I don't believe in. I would be 'stuck' alone along the lines of '...for worse...' as I stated in my vows.
Apr 24 new

[quote]Meg-920823 said: Until the Church decides whether or not a Sacramental marriage took place at the time of our vows, I am married to a man that I am not living with and do not see. It is a very weird feeling...to be married but to be alone; Was/am I married or not? Did a Sacramental marriage exist?


Meg,

I could have written your whole observation word for word! I have my first decision from the Tribunal and the feelings upon receipt were so mixed and complicated. Relief, affirmation, sadness, sorrow, loss, freedom, a shadow has certainly lifted and I check my mailbox every day hoping for the second letter affirming the annulment.

Apr 24 new
(Quote) Elizabeth-846499 said: (Quote) Meg-920823 said: Until the Church decides whether or not a Sacramental marriage to...
(Quote) Elizabeth-846499 said:

[quote]Meg-920823 said: Until the Church decides whether or not a Sacramental marriage took place at the time of our vows, I am married to a man that I am not living with and do not see. It is a very weird feeling...to be married but to be alone; Was/am I married or not? Did a Sacramental marriage exist?




Meg,



I could have written your whole observation word for word! I have my first decision from the Tribunal and the feelings upon receipt were so mixed and complicated. Relief, affirmation, sadness, sorrow, loss, freedom, a shadow has certainly lifted and I check my mailbox every day hoping for the second letter affirming the annulment.

--hide--


I am praying for you, Elizabeth!

I am pretty sure I know how I will feel if I receive an affirmative letter but I guess I can't know for sure. My situation has dragged out for quite awhile so it feels like it was already another life a long time ago. In fact, sometimes I think maybe it was a um...not so good dream I had.
Apr 24 new
(Quote) Helena-961554 said: Congrats Laura! It is definitely a sigh of relief when its all over. Its not really about "if". I...
(Quote) Helena-961554 said:

Congrats Laura! It is definitely a sigh of relief when its all over. Its not really about "if". It is about knowing what God wills. And an affirmation for us to know that our former marriages were never built on the right foundation... and in a sense, doomed to fail. And its pretty miraculous that some do survive having begun under the same circumstances.



As for me, I got my annullment last fall. And after 12 years of nothing. I really didn't know what to think anymore.



Now the question is, What does God want for my life now that I am free? Free to glorify him in a new marriage or glorify and witness as a single person. Sometimes I feel like, "Great, I'm annulled. Now what? I am a single mother of 4 children, in my mid 40's . Does God want me to marry again? What about children, can I really have more? Should I have more? There are so many purposes of marriage, can I do this again... for the first time for real??; Is it my selfish desire for a companion/spouse/partner/_______, or has God planted that desire for me?"




So many questions.

--hide--


hug hug God bless you, Helena.
May 15 new

(Quote) Laura-824866 said: WooHoo! Just got the letter that the first affirmative decission has been made & in 7 days it...
(Quote) Laura-824866 said:

WooHoo! Just got the letter that the first affirmative decission has been made & in 7 days it'll move on to the final judgement. It is a very weird feeling (sad, exhilirating, hurt & joy), but I am ready to move forwards! Continued prayers please!

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Congratulations, Laura !!! Praying

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