Faith Focused Dating. Create your Free Profile and meet your Match! Sign Up for Free

info: Please Sign Up or Sign In to continue.

info: Please Sign Up or Sign In to continue.

info: Please Sign Up or Sign In to continue.

A place to learn, mingle, and share

Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

01/29/2013 new

I think it would make more sense for women to be 'cougars' marrying younger men, than men marrying much younger women -- statistically, women live longer, right? Why is it more acceptable for women to be married to older men, who then die and leave the woman alone for 10+ years, lonely and missing her man? Wouldn't it make more sense for men to marry older women and leave this world more or less at thesame time? Just my 2 cents.


Sorry! Probably not at all what you are looking for.

01/29/2013 new

(Quote) Rachel-731570 said: I think it would make more sense for women to be 'cougars' marrying younger men, than me...
(Quote) Rachel-731570 said:

I think it would make more sense for women to be 'cougars' marrying younger men, than men marrying much younger women -- statistically, women live longer, right? Why is it more acceptable for women to be married to older men, who then die and leave the woman alone for 10+ years, lonely and missing her man? Wouldn't it make more sense for men to marry older women and leave this world more or less at thesame time? Just my 2 cents.


Sorry! Probably not at all what you are looking for.

--hide--

Hello Rachel,

Well, I cannot say that, one way or the other, I've ever been a believer in statistics. We need to focus, I believe, more in the realm of what unites us with another person...on the inside, than to waste time worrying about the "what if's". Indeed, only God knows what the future holds...and many times, even in what we might consider the "ideal situations" in life...the most unexpected things can become reality. What it truly comes down to, is learning to trust in Our Lord...not in statistics, societal opinions, and worldly ideas! smile

Have a beautiful day!

01/29/2013 new

I'm having a problem wondering why we find it necessary to use derogatory labels at all. I'm all about minding my own business. If it is not illegal or taking groceries off of my table or corrupting the morals of minors - I don't find it necessary to comment on anyone else's behavior, nor to spend any real amount of time worrying about it. However, I do think it wrong for one human being to use another human being to his or her disadvantage for gain, pleasure, or status - be it male or female.

01/29/2013 new

Are you considered a "Cougar" if you date someone about five years younger?



Absolutely not.

01/29/2013 new

(Quote) Kristen-878108 said: Well, hopefully that subject got your attention! I've seen several posts now related...
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:

Well, hopefully that subject got your attention!

I've seen several posts now related to this topic. There is an article on the website www.catholicmatch.com about being a cougar. Donna has posted an article with a different perspective in another thread (www.catholicmatch.com. And here is the article she posted: thecurrentconscience.com


So here are my questions:

What is a cougar? Is it a woman who is pursuing a relationship with a younger man, or does it mean something else a bit more risqué?


IF being a cougar means a woman in a relationship with a younger man, why is it so threatening that a naughty sounding word is ascribed to the woman for doing this? There is no corresponding name for the man in such a relationship. (See the Current Conscience article for a discussion about the word Sugar Daddy not being a fair comparison)


So finally, what's wrong with being a cougar? And I'm not looking for lots of you to post "Nothing. It's what YOU want that matters." That's not what I'm asking - because apparently this behavior is disturbing enough to some that they need to label it. So let's just hear what's out there. By the way, the medieval obsession with "witches" was for very similar reasons. Very intriguing. Looking forward to some exciting discussion!



--hide--


NOTHING! :) I know 2 very mature, Catholic 26 year olds whom I'd love to date. lol

01/29/2013 new
I don't think there is anything wrong with it, if there is a pure thought to it and an appropriate difference. Like 5 yrs are a different story than 15 yrs. But even a man being that much older i personally find inappropriate. I do believe though that everyone has a right to decide this for themselves without people judging them for it as it is their life. When it comes to Why it is acceptable for men to be older within society has to do I think with our nature. Men are capable of having children till death, where as women on average can't have children after 40. Also women usually mature earlier than men, so men who are older will equal the maturitylevel of a woman younger Personally I have always liked someone to be a little older than me, but I think there is absolutely nothing wrong with it being the other way around if It's done in a purely thought.
01/29/2013 new

(Quote) Kristen-878108 said: Well, hopefully that subject got your attention! I've seen several posts now related...
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:

Well, hopefully that subject got your attention!

I've seen several posts now related to this topic. There is an article on the website www.catholicmatch.com about being a cougar. Donna has posted an article with a different perspective in another thread (www.catholicmatch.com. And here is the article she posted: thecurrentconscience.com


So here are my questions:

What is a cougar? Is it a woman who is pursuing a relationship with a younger man, or does it mean something else a bit more risqué?


IF being a cougar means a woman in a relationship with a younger man, why is it so threatening that a naughty sounding word is ascribed to the woman for doing this? There is no corresponding name for the man in such a relationship. (See the Current Conscience article for a discussion about the word Sugar Daddy not being a fair comparison)


So finally, what's wrong with being a cougar? And I'm not looking for lots of you to post "Nothing. It's what YOU want that matters." That's not what I'm asking - because apparently this behavior is disturbing enough to some that they need to label it. So let's just hear what's out there. By the way, the medieval obsession with "witches" was for very similar reasons. Very intriguing. Looking forward to some exciting discussion!



--hide--
Kristen -- It's not the age that's important -- it's the mileage.... biggrin

01/29/2013 new

(Quote) Sally-894891 said: I don't think there is anything wrong with it, if there is a pure thought to it and an appropriate d...
(Quote) Sally-894891 said: I don't think there is anything wrong with it, if there is a pure thought to it and an appropriate difference. Like 5 yrs are a different story than 15 yrs. But even a man being that much older i personally find inappropriate. I do believe though that everyone has a right to decide this for themselves without people judging them for it as it is their life. When it comes to Why it is acceptable for men to be older within society has to do I think with our nature. Men are capable of having children till death, where as women on average can't have children after 40. Also women usually mature earlier than men, so men who are older will equal the maturitylevel of a woman younger Personally I have always liked someone to be a little older than me, but I think there is absolutely nothing wrong with it being the other way around if It's done in a purely thought.
--hide--



Actually Sally, some men are capable of having children until death, but some (maybe most) are not for a variety of reasons (some of which are due to dropoff in testosterone level that happens as men age.) Also, women are quite capable of having children very successfully in their 40's and even early 50's, however, the rate of Down's syndrome and perhaps other genetic diseases does increase after age 30-35 (and not just for the women, the increase in genetic disease in the newborn also does increase as the man's age increases). And, although women do generally mature earlier than men, this is significant really only when women are in their teens or early twenties, men do catch up to women by their mid-late 20's in emotional/psychological maturity - at least some do (sorry, I couldn't resist). And, since men on average die about 7 years before women, it would make a lot of sense for women to marry men about years younger if they want to spend the rest of their life together. (Of course, there are many exceptions to this, but these are the current statistics.)

01/29/2013 new

(Quote) Tara-916865 said: NOTHING! :) I know 2 very mature, Catholic 26 year olds whom I'd love to...
(Quote) Tara-916865 said:


NOTHING! :) I know 2 very mature, Catholic 26 year olds whom I'd love to date. lol

--hide--


I hope it works out! smile

01/29/2013 new

(Quote) Dominick-174178 said: Hello Kristen, Well, basically speaking, it's nothing but a derogatory term...a label...
(Quote) Dominick-174178 said:

Hello Kristen,

Well, basically speaking, it's nothing but a derogatory term...a label which tells of the trashy nature of contemporary society, and it's useage in this sense only shows the immaturity and ignorance

--hide--

From what I understand, the cougar phenomenon has little, if not nothing, to do with dating, courtship, love or marriage. It has to do with sex. Older (usually attractive and financially secure) women going out on the town looking only for young energetic and eager men to sleep with with no commitments and young eager men on the prowl for older experienced women to sleep with with no commitments. Am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?

According to Wikipidia: "Cougar is a slang term referring to a woman who seeks sexual relations with considerably younger men this does not apply to those woman who have a stable and lasting relationship with their younger partner."

An older woman who truly loves a younger man should be insulted by being called a cougar.

The last time I went out on a girls night to a nice club/restauant with about 10 co-workers roughly my age, we were swarmed and vigorously pursued by young men in their 20's. I was stunned as I had not been at a club in many many years. They were not even looking at many young attractive women their own age. I was pretty turned off.

Posts 11 - 20 of 147