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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Feb 14th 2013 new

(Quote) Justin-32820 said: One things i'll add, to try focus on your own passions, that's one of the mo...
(Quote) Justin-32820 said:


One things i'll add, to try focus on your own passions, that's one of the most attractive things a woman a can do.

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Good advice Justin! So true!

Feb 14th 2013 new

(Quote) Cheryl-409772 said: Ok, I read this now...makes a little more sense though still misguided because as soon as he add...
(Quote) Cheryl-409772 said:

Ok, I read this now...makes a little more sense though still misguided because as soon as he added the words, "but if he ever does" the rest went out the window.

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It's the whole "sparing feelings" thing. Every guy I know is like this, and my dad doesn't "get it" either. Like, one time my ex was in possession of a very special bottle of wine of mine, and he and his roommate drank it- he thought so long as he replaced it and I didn't know any better, why tell me. I've had the conversation with my dad before (as well as other men) and the answer is always the same: "WHY on Earth would you want to know if it's just going to hurt your feelings??"

Feb 14th 2013 new

My ex knew I would not put up with him being unfaithful during our marriage -- he says he felt that as long as I never found out about all his cheating, it was fine because if I didn't know I wouldn't be hurt, and because he was very careful to keep me stranded at home with 6 kids, no freedom to go out, no free time, no help in parenting/housework/yardwork/etc, he for many years was able to use my trusting naivete to cheat with many women/young girls for many years until I caught him. He was extreme, but for many men, they just don't get that truth is more important than sparing feelings.

Feb 14th 2013 new

(Quote) Rachel-731570 said: My ex knew I would not put up with him being unfaithful during our marriage -- he says he felt t...
(Quote) Rachel-731570 said:

My ex knew I would not put up with him being unfaithful during our marriage -- he says he felt that as long as I never found out about all his cheating, it was fine because if I didn't know I wouldn't be hurt, and because he was very careful to keep me stranded at home with 6 kids, no freedom to go out, no free time, no help in parenting/housework/yardwork/etc, he for many years was able to use my trusting naivete to cheat with many women/young girls for many years until I caught him. He was extreme, but for many men, they just don't get that truth is more important than sparing feelings.

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Wow that is awful! I'm so sorry he did that to you- I mean, once is -almost- understandable depending (heavily) on the conditions of it, and with forthright honesty it can work out; but many times? That's sounds really manipulative alright :/ I can't imagine how that feels, it's not comparable at all to my sitch. My ex had been seeing someone behind my back, they weren't even physically affectionate with each other, but emotional cheating is still cheating in my book, and she didn't know about me- they were talking about trying for a relationship. I had told him if he wanted an open relationship (since we weren't married or anything) I was fine with him seeing other girls so long as he was honest (well, not fine, but agreeable). I said that before I found out, after I found out, and before I broke up with him. But he never wanted an open relationship and cut off the other girl, but never got over his feelings for her, and still hasn't. I actually encouraged him to date her while we were together, get it out of his system, give him some insight to compare us, or we could take a break, but he wouldn't. He just was never mine..and if he'd been honest from the start, we would have saved a lot of time, investment, and feelings.

Feb 19th 2013 new

Okay, trying to give it the ole' bump! I wish I had known how important it is to love and take care of yourself first so you can attract the best man for you!

Feb 19th 2013 new

(Quote) Kristen-878108 said: Okay, trying to give it the ole' bump! I wish I had known how important it is to love and take ca...
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said: Okay, trying to give it the ole' bump! I wish I had known how important it is to love and take care of yourself first so you can attract the best man for you!
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graduate clap

Feb 19th 2013 new
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said: "Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus" (dating myself) was a really intriguing book to me when I...
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:

"Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus" (dating myself) was a really intriguing book to me when I was in college - I really didn't understand how differently men and women interpreted reality. What's one thing you wish the opposite sex knew about you? What's one thing YOU wish you had known a bit earlier about the opposite sex?

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I wish men knew that just because I am chatting a LOT initially doesn't mean I do it all the time and it is usually an indicator of nervousness on my part. And that nervousness means I REALLY like you.

I wish I had known that not all men appreciate my sense of humor.
Feb 19th 2013 new

(Quote) Kristen-878108 said: "Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus" (dating myself) was a really intriguing boo...
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:

"Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus" (dating myself) was a really intriguing book to me when I was in college - I really didn't understand how differently men and women interpreted reality. What's one thing you wish the opposite sex knew about you? What's one thing YOU wish you had known a bit earlier about the opposite sex?

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Yep another good thread Kristen :-).

I wish men knew my kindness is in no way related to weakness.

I wish men and women knew my openness and readiness to share what I think is awesome about you, is based on the fact that as a child I was the child that no one had to worry about, always did what I was told, never got into trouble etc and as such, sometimes felt overlooked and not validated. So I decided when I grew up, that I would never hesitate to tell someone that I loved them, thought the world of them, etc.

I wish men knew that intelligence and sharing exhillerating conversations is the most fantastic encounter available.

One thing I wish I had known about men earlier was that while they may never say it, they look for those little things and they matter to them as well.

Feb 19th 2013 new

I wish men knew the power of their hug. I wish they knew how much it meant to some of us to be enveloped in a kind and loving embrace. At times it is just what we need and other times it is all that we need. K I S S Keep It Simple Sweetheart!

Feb 19th 2013 new

(Quote) Kristen-878108 said: "Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus" (dating myself) was a really intriguing boo...
(Quote) Kristen-878108 said:

"Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus" (dating myself) was a really intriguing book to me when I was in college - I really didn't understand how differently men and women interpreted reality. What's one thing you wish the opposite sex knew about you? What's one thing YOU wish you had known a bit earlier about the opposite sex?

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What an amazing thread :-)

One thing I wish I had known about women 15 years ago: That they want to be persued (noone told me that till grad school), but that many of them are terribly indirect about their intentions (this one has burned me several times - if only girls would just say, up front, I only like you as a friend or the opposite).


Something I wish that women knew about themselves: It's been said that men value looks, but this man, at least, believes very strongly that girls are naturally physically attractive to guys - I think that a vast, vast majority of women are stunning - and that all the makeup and hair and stress aren't worth it - if you could see yourself through our eyes for a moment, you would see just how stunning you are. There's a reason Tolkien could write, "Though all to ruin fell the world/and were dissolved and backward hurled/unmade into the old abyss,/yet were its making good, for this---/the dusk, the dawn, the earth, the sea---/That Lúthien for a time should be."

Something I wish women knew about men: That many of us are terribly, terribly insecure and non-confident (and lack of confidence is apparently like kryptonite to girls), but that this doesn't necessarily mean that we would be bad dating partners or husbands, only that at some point in the past someone kicked us in our metaphorical guts and told us we were trash, and we believed them.

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