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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Feb 18th 2013 new
(Quote) Moire-630682 said: I'm giving this site another shot after trying (at last count) 6-7 other dating sites over the past few yea...
(Quote) Moire-630682 said:

I'm giving this site another shot after trying (at last count) 6-7 other dating sites over the past few years. I originally signed up two or three years ago, but after "chatting" with guys for weeks on end none of them ever asked me out, so I wound up canceling my subscription. This time around it seems even worse; I've only been in contact with one guy and he IMs, rather than messages me, which I have a harder time with personally since I am up and around a lot. I've sent emoticons/short messages to several other guys with no response.




I mean, I'm fully aware it might just be me, but... I don't get it. Again, I've been on other sites, and even though I may not be in a relationship I at least got lots of dates and met some nice/interesting people. What's the deal? Has anyone else encountered this?

--hide--


I would not rule out possibility to meet the "right" one here. It does take effort. People drop off from communicating for many reasons, so don't take it as a negative. Things hopefully will work for the best.
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Feb 18th 2013 new

(Quote) Marge-938695 said: Heck YES. I've probably met...
(Quote) Marge-938695 said:

Heck YES. I've probably met 50 or more, and I count several CM guys/gals among my best friends.

Aunt Millie's tips:

1. Make the first contact. Many people are shy. Go ahead. Be the first one to send a message or emote. Be the first one to say, "Let's have lunch." Any man who freaks out because you ask first isn't worth knowing, IMHO...he's got ego issues.

2. Organize a lunch, picnic, dinner, or other get-together in your area and invite local CM people. It doesn't have to be a big affair like CM Chicago, etc.. The Boston group assembles at least twice a year for horseback riding and ice cream. The Cincinatti people have a monthly dinner night. Even if it's just you and two other ladies, you'll have fun.

3. If you see that another CMer is going to be in your town, offer to meet him/her for drinks or lunch -- or to serve as a tour guide. If you are travelling, let folks in that area know, and maybe they will host you. It's very comforting to arrive in a new place and already have an acquaintance there. (Note: One nice man from England travelled all over the States a few years ago and met with CM people in nearly every town he visited.)

4. Save your pennies up and attend one of the big events (like Chicago). They are lots of fun.

5. Keep posting in the forums. If people see how you think, you will not be a total stranger when you meet IRL. Likewise, if someone posts something you particularly like, send him/her a message and say so. Maybe that will get a conversation going.

6. Don't give up. There are all kinds of reasons someone may not respond: not a paid member, illness, job worries, another relationship, etc., etc.. But those things are not permanent. Some ladies have told me that their guys waited a full month before responding to her first contact -- but after that it went like wildfire. (Who knows why?)

7. Don't take things personally. We cannot be everyone's cup of tea. But maybe you will be the prize in the Cracker Jack box for some nice CM guy.


--hide--


GREAT advice from Aunt Mille! heart

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Feb 18th 2013 new

I've met several women from this site. None of them worked out for me, but all of them were great women and made every moment I've spent here very worthwhile.

Think of CM as a "screening process" (as opposed to a "candy store"), and I think you'll have some luck. Use the CM profiles to narrow down prospective matches based on location, age, appearance, profile entries, likes/dislikes, etc. Then go from there.

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Feb 18th 2013 new

Marge - thanks for the encouraging ideas! biggrin

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Feb 18th 2013 new

I would add to the posts already given that it also depends on your location. I am about to move to my third city since joining CM. I have met some very nice people, but the amount of people online relatively close to my area has fluctuated quite a bt. Seems CM is just more popular in certain parts of the US.

I am getting ready to move to Louisville, KY. I did a quick search and after viewing the results I am wondering where did all the catholics go in that area. Versus I looked into a job offer in Chicago and did a search and went wow, look at all the people on CM in that area.


You may be experiencing that as well.

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Feb 18th 2013 new

Moire,


I'm new to this whole online site thing by a week! As I look around at the forum discussions, this seems to come up quite a bit in all the different sections and forums - I just asked for the rules of the game myself. I did follow one piece of advice, which is to read the profile carefully and respond to something in it, rather than just sending an emotigram - and responses came back. I am genuinely interested in people and can always find something pleasant about them to notice and I think people like feeling that something they put out there in 'cyberland' is special. I don't know if that helps, as I am navigating my way around this issue too!

blessings sister!

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Feb 18th 2013 new
(Quote) Moire-630682 said: I'm giving this site another shot after trying (at last count) 6-7 other dating sites over the past few yea...
(Quote) Moire-630682 said:

I'm giving this site another shot after trying (at last count) 6-7 other dating sites over the past few years. I originally signed up two or three years ago, but after "chatting" with guys for weeks on end none of them ever asked me out, so I wound up canceling my subscription. This time around it seems even worse; I've only been in contact with one guy and he IMs, rather than messages me, which I have a harder time with personally since I am up and around a lot. I've sent emoticons/short messages to several other guys with no response.




I mean, I'm fully aware it might just be me, but... I don't get it. Again, I've been on other sites, and even though I may not be in a relationship I at least got lots of dates and met some nice/interesting people. What's the deal? Has anyone else encountered this?

--hide--
yes a wonderful girl from Riverdale NY. She broke it off She is still awesome in my book. Hope and Pray she finds the right guy
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Feb 18th 2013 new

(Quote) Moire-630682 said: I'm giving this site another shot after trying (at last count) 6-7 other dating sites over th...
(Quote) Moire-630682 said:

I'm giving this site another shot after trying (at last count) 6-7 other dating sites over the past few years. I originally signed up two or three years ago, but after "chatting" with guys for weeks on end none of them ever asked me out, so I wound up canceling my subscription. This time around it seems even worse; I've only been in contact with one guy and he IMs, rather than messages me, which I have a harder time with personally since I am up and around a lot. I've sent emoticons/short messages to several other guys with no response.


I mean, I'm fully aware it might just be me, but... I don't get it. Again, I've been on other sites, and even though I may not be in a relationship I at least got lots of dates and met some nice/interesting people. What's the deal? Has anyone else encountered this?

--hide--


I have found that there is more value to this site than just dating. These forums are a great way to meet other catholic singles and discuss various issues of the church, dating life, single life, and one's relationship with God. Having said that, I realize that dating is the primary reason to sign up so I am not trying to downplay it. As for me, I have been a periodic member and I usually sign up for 3 month memberships and then take breaks. Perhaps since I am fortunate to live in a densly populated area in Chicago, I have manged to correspond with quite a few single women and meet quite a few over the years. Unfortunately, the longest lasting "relationship" from this site only lasted 1 month but that hasn't detered me from continuing to try.... you only have to get it right once.


I have tried other dating site also and had similar mixed results. Ironically, the site I didn't like the most, eharmony, produced a 1 year relationship and an engagement (albeit brief). All the sites have some positives and negatives but I feel catholic match is the best. Remain patient and continue to pray.

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Feb 18th 2013 new
(Quote) Moire-630682 said: I'm giving this site another shot after trying (at last count) 6-7 other dating sites over the past few yea...
(Quote) Moire-630682 said:

I'm giving this site another shot after trying (at last count) 6-7 other dating sites over the past few years. I originally signed up two or three years ago, but after "chatting" with guys for weeks on end none of them ever asked me out, so I wound up canceling my subscription. This time around it seems even worse; I've only been in contact with one guy and he IMs, rather than messages me, which I have a harder time with personally since I am up and around a lot. I've sent emoticons/short messages to several other guys with no response.


I mean, I'm fully aware it might just be me, but... I don't get it. Again, I've been on other sites, and even though I may not be in a relationship I at least got lots of dates and met some nice/interesting people. What's the deal? Has anyone else encountered this?

--hide--
I've talked to many, chatted with many, and met many wonderful men and women from this site. Timing is everything. Good luck and God bless your search. I know that this site has brought many couples together.
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Feb 19th 2013 new

(Quote) David-364112 said: GREAT advice from Aunt Mille!
(Quote) David-364112 said:


GREAT advice from Aunt Mille!

--hide--
BTW Who is Aunt Millie? (never heard of her)? laughing

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