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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Feb 21st 2013 new
(Quote) Marge-938695 said: The operative words here are MIGHT and MAYBE.Why don't you give t...
(Quote) Marge-938695 said:


The operative words here are MIGHT and MAYBE.
Why don't you give the gal a chance to decide for herself?

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If I am interested in her I will give her a chance to decide. Intimidation doesn't automatically mean that I am going to shy away if I am interested. For me it is mostly a thought process. I just wanted to give Sarah an example of something that might cause a guy to shy away or simply not have any interest.
Feb 22nd 2013 new

I had a guy tell me a while back I was too independent. Well sometimes life makes us that way. We have to learn to be on our own in a hurry, and not because of choice, but because of circumstance. We may be an independent bunch, but we still like to be treated like the ladies we are.

Feb 22nd 2013 new
(Quote) Sharon-885911 said: I had a guy tell me a while back I was too independent. Well sometimes life makes us that way. We have to le...
(Quote) Sharon-885911 said:

I had a guy tell me a while back I was too independent. Well sometimes life makes us that way. We have to learn to be on our own in a hurry, and not because of choice, but because of circumstance. We may be an independent bunch, but we still like to be treated like the ladies we are.

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I agree...maybe the key is to be a little dependent, while all the while knowing we can take care of our selves if need be....then maybe everyone will be happy
Feb 22nd 2013 new

Not exactly sure what you are asking...I have felt "intimidated" in the past to approach a certain woman...I suppose there were feelings that she could "do better" so to speak. Part of it would be her physical beauty. I don't think she would turn every guys head when she walked in to a room, but she would mine. I think a lot of the "intimidation" stemmed from me being just a "blue collar type" police officer whose job it was to protect her (and every one else on Capitol Hill) and, in my eyes, her being a very well-educated, professional working for a United States Senator. I projected on her, and the female staff in general, that they would be most likely unwilling to date one of the officers just there to protect them. And have thus "torpedoed" any chance I may have had before even trying. I guess you just imagine that such an individual is looking for someone who makes a similar salary, similarly educated etc. and you wonder what you could offer them. So...Yes...I have been "intimidated" to approach....I can't say I have ever rejected a woman for being too independent. I think I would be quite alright with it if I felt that, in the end, a woman had "settled"(for lack of a better word) for me.


Rejection doesn't feel so great. Particularly if you can't really avoid the one who may reject you. Maybe some guys prefer a "safer bet". In my case it also felt somewhat inappropriate given my position and hers. The female staff are in some ways "forced" to interact with us given the way security is set up. This is where she works, and I'm there to do a job...There are plenty of officers who would like to believe that every smile and "hello" is some sort of "invitation"...

Feb 22nd 2013 new

(Quote) Jim-50634 said: Not exactly sure what you are asking...I have felt "intimidated" in the past to approa...
(Quote) Jim-50634 said:

Not exactly sure what you are asking...I have felt "intimidated" in the past to approach a certain woman...I suppose there were feelings that she could "do better" so to speak. Part of it would be her physical beauty. I don't think she would turn every guys head when she walked in to a room, but she would mine. I think a lot of the "intimidation" stemmed from me being just a "blue collar type" police officer whose job it was to protect her (and every one else on Capitol Hill) and, in my eyes, her being a very well-educated, professional working for a United States Senator. I projected on her, and the female staff in general, that they would be most likely unwilling to date one of the officers just there to protect them. And have thus "torpedoed" any chance I may have had before even trying. I guess you just imagine that such an individual is looking for someone who makes a similar salary, similarly educated etc. and you wonder what you could offer them. So...Yes...I have been "intimidated" to approach....I can't say I have ever rejected a woman for being too independent. I think I would be quite alright with it if I felt that, in the end, a woman had "settled"(for lack of a better word) for me.


Rejection doesn't feel so great. Particularly if you can't really avoid the one who may reject you. Maybe some guys prefer a "safer bet". In my case it also felt somewhat inappropriate given my position and hers. The female staff are in some ways "forced" to interact with us given the way security is set up. This is where she works, and I'm there to do a job...There are plenty of officers who would like to believe that every smile and "hello" is some sort of "invitation"...

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Is she an active Catholic Jim? If she is and she is an honorable woman who will treat you as you deserve, then go for it and she would have to count herself blessed. As a man of God you have a priceless gift to offer; the pearl beyond price that is an honorable man. Do not EVER think that you are what someone settled for. If a woman EVER makes you feel that way then I ask you to run in the opposite direction no matter her position, education or professional success. A woman who truly loves you will see you as the best man in world for her. She will think that even if she ever had to choose between you and even the president or the wealthiest man on earth, she would still choose you. You derserve that kind of love and to be treated with that sort of dignity. God who is God loved you so much that he positioned you little lower than He Himself as God and higher than even the angels. Let no one cause you to forget that dignity and that worth. No amount of worldly success can even begin to claim the glory of what we are when when we embrace Christ and His plan for us. A plan that seeks to draw us so close to him that we radiate Him, His light and His might and become stunningly beautiful no matter who we are or what we look like physically. LOVE ALWAYS SEEKS TO ELEVATE THE DIGNITY OF THE LOVED. Worldy love is a foretaste of that heavenly love. You are the prize, not the other way around. Embrace and believe that.

Feb 22nd 2013 new

Can you please expand on what you mean by strong personality ?

Feb 22nd 2013 new

(Quote) Sue-501768 said: I agree...maybe the key is to be a little dependent, while all the while knowing we can take care of our s...
(Quote) Sue-501768 said: I agree...maybe the key is to be a little dependent, while all the while knowing we can take care of our selves if
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You mean (Gasp!) ACT helpless???? eyepopping faint

IMNSOHO, women don't have to be/act helpless...provided that they appreciate the things their men do for them and remember to say, "Thanks" and "That was really helpful" and "I really appreciate it" and "You're a nice person".

Feb 22nd 2013 new

I don't buy the excuse that guys are "too intimidated" to contact a woman. I strongly believe that if a man sees something he wants, he will figure out a way to get it whether that's in his professional life, relationships, etc. Now, maybe a man could be intimidated initially but I don't think that would stop him from going for it if he was really interested.

I honestly think it's something that women tell one another to feel better. . .

Feb 23rd 2013 new

(Quote) Shara-929649 said: Is she an active Catholic Jim? If she is and she is an honorable woman who will treat yo...
(Quote) Shara-929649 said:

Is she an active Catholic Jim? If she is and she is an honorable woman who will treat you as you deserve, then go for it and she would have to count herself blessed. As a man of God you have a priceless gift to offer; the pearl beyond price that is an honorable man. Do not EVER think that you are what someone settled for. If a woman EVER makes you feel that way then I ask you to run in the opposite direction no matter her position, education or professional success. A woman who truly loves you will see you as the best man in world for her. She will think that even if she ever had to choose between you and even the president or the wealthiest man on earth, she would still choose you. You derserve that kind of love and to be treated with that sort of dignity. God who is God loved you so much that he positioned you little lower than He Himself as God and higher than even the angels. Let no one cause you to forget that dignity and that worth. No amount of worldly success can even begin to claim the glory of what we are when when we embrace Christ and His plan for us. A plan that seeks to draw us so close to him that we radiate Him, His light and His might and become stunningly beautiful no matter who we are or what we look like physically. LOVE ALWAYS SEEKS TO ELEVATE THE DIGNITY OF THE LOVED. Worldy love is a foretaste of that heavenly love. You are the prize, not the other way around. Embrace and believe that.

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WOW, Shara! Well said, my dear.

Feb 23rd 2013 new

(Quote) Marge-938695 said: So....are we women supposed to be intimidated by the men?
(Quote) Marge-938695 said:

So....are we women supposed to be intimidated by the men?

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But of course laughing laughing wink

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