(Quote) Brian-278516 said:
Ray from your perspective this very well might be true "The purpose of sending ...
(Quote) Brian-278516 said:
Ray from your perspective this very well might be true "The purpose of sending private/personal greetings isn't intended as an attraction process by me -- it's meant as a friendship gesture. No strings attached -- no expectations of anything else -- just a friendly greeting."
But here are a couple things we have had to contend with that you may not be thinking of.
1. When people (usually men) are significantly older and depending on the age range a 40 year old guy sending to a 19 year old women is different than a 60 year old guy sending to a 39 year old women however in either case the man may be using friendship as a disguise in order to have communication with that women in order for it to become more romantic in his mind.
2. Even if a message is innocently friendly with no alternative motive many (women especially) do not like to see their inbox with men old enough to be their father or grandfather. While you and others view CatholicMatch as a dating site and community of singles many do not especially when dealing with the opposite sex and feel creeped out when these see messages from those people come in. It is not a matter of them being able to block the person etc it is merely a fact that they are coming into their inbox on a dating site.
Again doesn't mean we can't come up with other ideas and methods to obtain the same results but it is not simple and their are many moving parts both from the software side as well as the customer perspective side. Often times customers get upset about how something works because of their personal way of using the site or personality or just general disposition but we have to look at things from a much broader and diverse perspective in order to try and satisfy as many as we humanly can.
Brian, FYI -- it wasn't my intention to continue this, but I wanted to clarify remarks that were made by others.
One thing I mentioned that seems to have escaped viewing is that I don't just look up profiles and sent messages. People I communicate with (or want to) are familiar faces from the forums. We already have some degree (little to a lot) of familiarity with one another, and at least are NOT strangers to each other. It is this group of people I'm referring to. The example of holiday greetings is one of them. I can send to many friends and at least familiar faces. The younger set, some of who hadn't communicated with me previously are eliminated from such greetings. Therein lies the problem. I don't bother complete strangers.
Virtually everyone sends holiday greetings back, if they haven't beat me to the punch. No one has ever told me to refrain from wishing them holiday greetings.
Those of us who are trying to keep this site friendly are being punished for the acts of a few bad apples. I appreciate the creepy feeling some inexperienced online people might get, but there's no basis for such feelings from me and from most others on CM. To me, this isn't only a dating site, as you can tell by my activity in the forums. That's why I have a problem with the policy as it exists.
It is my hope that something can be done to bring a satisfactory resolution to both sides.