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This room is for supportive and informative discussion about divorce and/or the annulment process. All posters must have been previously divorced or annulled.

Saint Eugene De Mazenod is patron of dysfunctional families & Saint Fabiola obtained a divorce from her first husband prior to devoting her life to charitable works.
Learn More: Saint Eugene De Mazenod and Saint Fabiola

Mar 21st 2013 new
(Quote) Lisa-727959 said: (Quote) Laura-857740 said: Im not sure anymore about annullments, my diocese ...
(Quote) Lisa-727959 said:

Quote:
Laura-857740 said:




Im not sure anymore about annullments, my diocese called and said they cannot process it, despite having witnesses write in, because I havent paid any money toward it. Said I cannot, trying to support myself and my child alone. Beginning to think its all about the money.


Hi, Laura,

Did whoever you spoke with actually say "the tribunal would not process your case because of non-payment?" If so, that employee had their facts wrong and you should, as Laura suggested, call back and speak with someone else.

Technically, there is no charge for the annulment process. Tribunals ask for a certain fee to be paid in order to recoup their administrative costs but not being able to pay in no way should affect the processing of your case.

I don't know of any tribunals that will not take a payment plan. In my own case, since I was eating hot dogs and Top Ramen for a long time, the Tribunal secretary let me make a $10 a month payment, but not before telling me that if I absolutely could not afford it, I didn't have to pay anything. I strongly encourage you to call your tribunal and speak with someone besides the one you spoke with, or at least get more clarification. If whomever you speak with insists they won't process your case until you pay, then I would promptly write a letter to your bishop, explaining your situation.

Financial hardship is one of the worst things to go through! Sorry you're in that position. Count on my prayers for you.

Sincerely,

Lisa Duffy

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Thank you Lisa and Laura. I wish I could offer some money....but I need to make the mortgage and bills right now. I only work part time because of my son being disabled, it's tough to find babysitters to help. It seems like the bills are getting higher, despite cutting back.
Mar 22nd 2013 new

(Quote) Lisa-727959 said: Dear Laurel, While the necessary elements of the annulment proce...
(Quote) Lisa-727959 said:

Dear Laurel,

While the necessary elements of the annulment process are pretty much the same wherever you go, the administrative details and requirements vary from diocese to diocese. Some dioceses, like the Archdiocese of Atlanta, require a waiting period of one year before filing for the annulment process. They do this because there are couples who reconcile during the process (a good thing, of course), drop the case, but have then utilized the tribunals resources (time, supplies, and utilities) without compensating them for their work. Other dioceses have no wait period whatsoever. Decisions like that are up to the presiding bishop. If you check with your diocese, you'll know how to proceed.

As for digging up the past... I know it's a difficult proposition, but a worthwhile one, nonetheless. Worthwhile for two prominent reasons: If you have remarried without obtaining a decree of nullity that stated you were free to marry (an annulment) you will now be able to rectify that and be able to receive the sacraments. That is a huge deal! Second, you will be able to experience healing on a completely new and different level. I encourage you to take this step and will pray for you as you do.

God bless,

Lisa Duffy

--hide--


My diocese has a 6 month "wait period" however my former spouse "jumped the gun" and filed for an annulment just 2 months after our divorce was final. He met with a former elderly priest from our parish who used to be a tribunal lawyer for the diocese and filled out the paperwork so that he would get the annulment granted quickly, according to the priest's instructions. Less than a year after his filing for the annulment and just over a year after our divorce was final, my former spouse contacted me, wanting to "reconcile". I was recovering from major surgery, preparing to begin cancer treatment, finishing my student teaching, and getting ready to graduate, as well as preparing to celebrate my autistic daughter's college graduation. He didn't like my answer, so he called the tribunal and threatened them (I do not know the nature of the threats as they would not tell me but they took the threats seriously). The point I am trying to make is that the "wait period" does not appear to be enforceable; diocesan staff members will do whatever they see fit. My former spouse wanted to marry a younger, illegal immigrant before she got deported back to Mexico, thus his sense of urgency. When that didn't work out he wanted to "work it out" with me but eventually had the illegal immigrant move in with him. Today they live together but are not married. The "wait period" is recommended but not enforced.

Mar 26th 2013 new
Hello Lauel, l am so glad to read your post. l am in a very similar situation as you...l have been "coming home" slowly over a 6 year period. The idea of an annulment frightens me and l worry about how my adult daughters will feel if l go through the process. l am usually very brave about most things...but not so brave about the annulment. Deanna
Mar 26th 2013 new

(Quote) Deanna-954277 said: Hello Lauel, l am so glad to read your post. l am in a very similar situation as you...l have been &quo...
(Quote) Deanna-954277 said: Hello Lauel, l am so glad to read your post. l am in a very similar situation as you...l have been "coming home" slowly over a 6 year period. The idea of an annulment frightens me and l worry about how my adult daughters will feel if l go through the process. l am usually very brave about most things...but not so brave about the annulment. Deanna
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I did not discuss anything about the annulment with my children.. They are all adults and nothing I do affects them.. Basically, I felt it was none of their business.

Mar 26th 2013 new

I agree with you Donna. While all my children are not of legal adult age (18), I have no intentions of discussing the annulment process that I went through with them. Deanna, I encourage you to move forward with the process.

Mar 26th 2013 new

(Quote) Jim-894045 said: I agree with you Donna. While all my children are not of legal adult age (18), I have no intentions...
(Quote) Jim-894045 said:

I agree with you Donna. While all my children are not of legal adult age (18), I have no intentions of discussing the annulment process that I went through with them. Deanna, I encourage you to move forward with the process.

--hide--


wink I like it when people agree with me.. laughing

Mar 26th 2013 new

(Quote) Laura-857740 said: Thank you Lisa and Laura. I wish I could offer some money....but I need to make the mortgage and bills r...
(Quote) Laura-857740 said: Thank you Lisa and Laura. I wish I could offer some money....but I need to make the mortgage and bills right now. I only work part time because of my son being disabled, it's tough to find babysitters to help. It seems like the bills are getting higher, despite cutting back.
--hide--


Laura, my parish priest told the Tribunal that I would not be able to pay when my paperwork was submitted.. Like Lisa said. They will not hold back an annulment because of inability to pay.

Mar 26th 2013 new
I was married for 5 yrs. I was never married in the Catholic Church do I still need an annulment?
Mar 27th 2013 new

I am working on mine for a couple of reasons.

1) Healing

2) Peace of mind and discernment

3) Just in case I do meet someone in the future.

Mar 27th 2013 new

(Quote) Jolynn-776398 said: I was married for 5 yrs. I was never married in the Catholic Church do I still need an annulment?
(Quote) Jolynn-776398 said: I was married for 5 yrs. I was never married in the Catholic Church do I still need an annulment?
--hide--

This isn't an exact quote and I am sure there are others who will have the full information, but I think the answer is if I got married in a Christian service, then yes there is a need for an annulment. If I just went to the courthouse, then no I don't.

The one thing I am sure of is I would check with my local diocesan tribunal to get the facts. I think what I said above is correct, but I am not 100% sure.

Will

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