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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
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Feb 28th 2013 new
(Quote) Michelle-443439 said: I am newly back on CM and thought it would be fun to see who was active and engage in a few forums. I am sh...
(Quote) Michelle-443439 said:

I am newly back on CM and thought it would be fun to see who was active and engage in a few forums. I am shocked and very saddened to see what I am finding. There is a lot of unkindness and very heated conversations. It used to be fun, a great way to interact and meet people, something I looked forward to checking out. Have people lost sight of why they are here? Sigh....

--hide--


The political forums can get intense, and something that I would like to stay far away from! It saddens me to know that people can be cut-throat and unkind when this is a website for Catholics. At first, it had me questioning if I should be on this site, but I know that the actions of a few can't and should not represent everyone else. However, we all can share our perspectives while being kind. It can work, trust me. ;)
Mar 3rd 2013 new

(Quote) Cheryl-409772 said: When I first joined, I remember telling someone something similar about the culture and events r...
(Quote) Cheryl-409772 said:

When I first joined, I remember telling someone something similar about the culture and events room...I think it was Rigo who Jim was just talking about...so many of us knew him. At any rate, I have greatly changed my opinion now...see Donna's post above. These are very passionate people who are dismayed at the way our culture has taken a downroad turn into the culture of death via the route of politicians and nonactive Christians. I think it is our Christian duty to pay attention...I realize this now that I have a son...it changes so many things when you know what kind of world he is inheriting. I also have learned SOOOOOOOOOOOO much from so many smart people on here. The least I can do is vote at this point and the most is to make sure I adhere to church teaching and attend some march of life or religious freedom rallies when I can.

--hide--

Hi Cheryl,

I appreciate your sentiments. Unfortunately online many things are lost in translation. I was not talking about sharing political views or dismay regarding the current state of affairs in our country or culture--- although I am deeply dissappointed in the culture of death. I consider myself fairly informed regarding concerns about culture, politics, and social issues (violations of human rights, etc), but this is a Forum on "Single Living" and I was referring specifically to the ways in which people write and post about their views on relationships with the opposite sex. There is absolutely a place for exchange of ideas regarding politics, religion, culture, and current events, I do believe these discussion are crucial, however, due to the nature of the post and the forum it was posted in I naturally assumed "Loosing sight of the purpose of CM" was commenting on relationships in the context of single living and online dating. The intent of my post was to say that I have seen in this forum that there have been many unsupportive and sometimes downright harsh things said in forum when it seem to me that the individual posting is truly trying to seek support as a single person and ask for advice regarding navigating the world of online dating. Although your comments make a lot of sense I think you misinterpreted what I said.

Take Care,

Melanie

Mar 4th 2013 new

(Quote) Melanie-909576 said: (Quote) Cheryl-409772 said: When I first joined, I remember telling some...
(Quote) Melanie-909576 said:

Quote:
Cheryl-409772 said:

When I first joined, I remember telling someone something similar about the culture and events room...I think it was Rigo who Jim was just talking about...so many of us knew him. At any rate, I have greatly changed my opinion now...see Donna's post above. These are very passionate people who are dismayed at the way our culture has taken a downroad turn into the culture of death via the route of politicians and nonactive Christians. I think it is our Christian duty to pay attention...I realize this now that I have a son...it changes so many things when you know what kind of world he is inheriting. I also have learned SOOOOOOOOOOOO much from so many smart people on here. The least I can do is vote at this point and the most is to make sure I adhere to church teaching and attend some march of life or religious freedom rallies when I can.


Hi Cheryl,

I appreciate your sentiments. Unfortunately online many things are lost in translation. I was not talking about sharing political views or dismay regarding the current state of affairs in our country or culture--- although I am deeply dissappointed in the culture of death. I consider myself fairly informed regarding concerns about culture, politics, and social issues (violations of human rights, etc), but this is a Forum on "Single Living" and I was referring specifically to the ways in which people write and post about their views on relationships with the opposite sex. There is absolutely a place for exchange of ideas regarding politics, religion, culture, and current events, I do believe these discussion are crucial, however, due to the nature of the post and the forum it was posted in I naturally assumed "Loosing sight of the purpose of CM" was commenting on relationships in the context of single living and online dating. The intent of my post was to say that I have seen in this forum that there have been many unsupportive and sometimes downright harsh things said in forum when it seem to me that the individual posting is truly trying to seek support as a single person and ask for advice regarding navigating the world of online dating. Although your comments make a lot of sense I think you misinterpreted what I said.

Take Care,

Melanie

--hide--
Melanie thank you for your clarification and response. First, let me say that I'm really glad you are up on these issues that affect our faith whle so young! Secondly, let me address what you were really talking about then....single living forums where you have encountered less than supportive comments. I'm sorry if that happened to you and can probably say that most of us have encountered it once or twice because people are coming from such varied life experiences. I think you are right though....people also lose things in the translation of messaging versus conversation. It is so much easier to say things for most people verbally usually. At any rate, I've been on CM for a while now and I have made many good friends on here that have had really good advice for me and been very supportive. I think while disappointed with the few we can be thankful for the majority, yes? Anyway, I hope you will continue to contribute to the threads as I think you have a lot to offer!

Mar 4th 2013 new

(Quote) Melanie-909576 said: Hi Cheryl, I appreciate your sentiments. Unfortunately online many thi...
(Quote) Melanie-909576 said:

Hi Cheryl,

I appreciate your sentiments. Unfortunately online many things are lost in translation. I was not talking about sharing political views or dismay regarding the current state of affairs in our country or culture--- although I am deeply dissappointed in the culture of death. I consider myself fairly informed regarding concerns about culture, politics, and social issues (violations of human rights, etc), but this is a Forum on "Single Living" and I was referring specifically to the ways in which people write and post about their views on relationships with the opposite sex. There is absolutely a place for exchange of ideas regarding politics, religion, culture, and current events, I do believe these discussion are crucial, however, due to the nature of the post and the forum it was posted in I naturally assumed "Loosing sight of the purpose of CM" was commenting on relationships in the context of single living and online dating. The intent of my post was to say that I have seen in this forum that there have been many unsupportive and sometimes downright harsh things said in forum when it seem to me that the individual posting is truly trying to seek support as a single person and ask for advice regarding navigating the world of online dating. Although your comments make a lot of sense I think you misinterpreted what I said.

Take Care,

Melanie

--hide--
Oh, and by the way, WELCOME! We always welcome the newbies on the forums!

Mar 5th 2013 new

(Quote) Candace-587406 said: The political forums can get intense, and something that I would like to stay far away from! I...
(Quote) Candace-587406 said:

The political forums can get intense, and something that I would like to stay far away from! It saddens me to know that people can be cut-throat and unkind when this is a website for Catholics. At first, it had me questioning if I should be on this site, but I know that the actions of a few can't and should not represent everyone else. However, we all can share our perspectives while being kind. It can work, trust me. ;)
--hide--


I absolutely agree it is possible to share your personal perspective while being respectful and kind. I think it is all about choosing your words carefully as it is a challenge and the written word is subject to being misperceived. Great insight!

Mar 5th 2013 new

While some of us bellyache on the forums, many many others are using the site for its intended purpose.


The list of engaged and married CM members keeps growing longer. More kids are born.


But those of us who cannot or will not get down to business make a point of harping. Why is that? This is a golden opportunity. Let's not waste it.


As my time on CM draws to a close, I can happily say that I've found many wonderful things here: deeper faith, good friends, and someone worth marrying. Now to focus on the annulment.

Mar 5th 2013 new

(Quote) Michelle-443439 said: I am newly back on CM and thought it would be fun to see who was active and engage in a few fo...
(Quote) Michelle-443439 said:

I am newly back on CM and thought it would be fun to see who was active and engage in a few forums. I am shocked and very saddened to see what I am finding. There is a lot of unkindness and very heated conversations. It used to be fun, a great way to interact and meet people, something I looked forward to checking out. Have people lost sight of why they are here? Sigh....

--hide--

Michelle,

Do not let the negativity and "heatedness" detour you. We are all human. Not everyone has the gift of being able to control their tongue or their anger or hostility. Not everyone knows how to love with the love of Christ or how to voice their opinion without being hateful. There ARE however, plenty of great discussions going on. Not everyone who responds to these discussion is going to have a positive, thought-provoking response. BUT do not let that detour you! Join in! We need positive people like you! :)

Tiffiany

Mar 5th 2013 new

(Quote) Michelle-443439 said: I am newly back on CM and thought it would be fun to see who was active and engage in a few fo...
(Quote) Michelle-443439 said:

I am newly back on CM and thought it would be fun to see who was active and engage in a few forums. I am shocked and very saddened to see what I am finding. There is a lot of unkindness and very heated conversations. It used to be fun, a great way to interact and meet people, something I looked forward to checking out. Have people lost sight of why they are here? Sigh....

--hide--


Hi Michelle I couldn't agree more, it is not only the unkindness and heated conversations which is in every room, it is also the moaning and groaning. The topics that what a man want in a woman or a woman wants in a man, has gone a little overboard.

I miss the old days when they were light hearted and both the men and women thought of ideas of drawing the other out in different humours ways. Now it has gotten to be doom, gloom and heavy conversation.

For me because I am one of the dinosaurs, it is because there weren't as many rooms and people got to learn to play nice in the sand box and for the most part played well together. Many matches and marriages in the past had come out of the forums.

I do not even come on as often as I use to, nor do I post because I do not think I could add anything to the topic.

Mar 5th 2013 new

(Quote) Jim-50634 said: What these forums need is Lisa-2533.......but.......she went and got married... ....most ...
(Quote) Jim-50634 said:

What these forums need is Lisa-2533.......but.......she went and got married...


....most of you probably have no idea who I'm talking about...

--hide--



Jim, yes Lisa was a nice attribute to the forums but before Lisa there were others as well, including another CM Match, Tracey from Chicago who now lives in Ireland. It was not only the women but the men such as Carl, Ron and others who thought of topics and brought their humour to the forums and others would add in. Also, I believe there were less rooms and therefore as I stated in another post in this topic, you learned to place nice and people would monitor each other if they got out of line.

We need to people to lighten up and bring some levity into the forums.

Mar 5th 2013 new

(Quote) Donna-83441 said: A few years ago in a book study at my parish someone made the remark that as Catholic...
(Quote) Donna-83441 said:


A few years ago in a book study at my parish someone made the remark that as Catholics we are all called to be kind and just get along with each other.. Our priest pointed out that everyone, even Catholics, bring their own agenda's to the table. That historically the Catholic Church is full of conflict and disagreements and even fighting.. He also said that even religious orders see their own kind of power struggles and discord among the members.. He said the Catholic Church is a family and as such, has the same issues to confront that every family does..

I find it 'interesting' that someone will come in here acting as the 'parent' telling all the 'children' that they need to stop fighting.. I think that most people start out here at least superficially looking for a mate.. Some of us find the Forums and make friends in here. So we might stay because of the friendships.. Once a while back I asked the question. "Would what happens in the Forums (fighting etc) make you leave CM? and 'Doesn't leaving because of others Forum behavior mean you lost sight of why you came to CM in the first place?' What is happening with the chat room malfunction the last week or so is another example.. Members are threatening to leave because they can't get into the chat rooms.. 'Really??? You paid for a membership on CM only for the chat room??'

--hide--


Yup and as a wise priest taught me many years ago "you'll be as successful as establishing a religous community as Christ was and He was crucified, do you expect to do better?' Mesage, accept people where they are at and pray for them.

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