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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Mar 23rd 2013 new

Jesus said to us "Be in the world but not of the world.
If your "of the world" your going to have a hard time remaining chaste.
Christopher west mentioned in his series on "Theology of the Body" that true freeedom is the ability to say yes and no when givin a choice.
If you can only say yes to that choice ie acting out on your sexual desires than you are dealing with and addiction.
So guess what, because of contraception and abortion and the media jamming sex, sex, sex down are throats for the last 50 years we have a world full of sex addicts. Women have been reduced to body parts and are dressing accordingly (skin tight yoga pants aren't helping ladies) What we've been told and what we think is just the natural response to sexual longings are actually more the cravings of an addiction. Are brain waves have been twisted and reordered.

What do addicts do to get their fix. They lie twist the truth "It's not a baby, it's a fetus" "What I do in the privacy of my own home's not hurting anyone" They sell out their family often stealing from them ect.. Yeah I love my kids but I really need to have this women in work or watch this pornography, I won't get caught."

So we need to untwist what has been twisted. As some have said trying to be chaste because we don't want to go to hell is not what Our Lord want's. We are approacing God out of fear not in love. Plus it's unhealthy, trying to block out all sexual thoughts all day can lead to anxiety and scuplosity. God put sexual emotion in us he deemed it good. If you see and attractive women the initial emotion of attraction is good it's not a sin. It's what you do with that emotion ie fantasizing about that women with your wife standing right next to you, is where the sin lies.

So how do we be chaste in an unchasted world. Lay it at the foot of the cross. "broad is the path that leads to destruction, narrow is the path that leads to eternal life". What's the broad path, - pride, What's the narrow path - humility. You can't do it yourself. like many have said you must utilize the tools the church has givin us, confession, the Eucharist, Adoration, Our lady, The rosary. Most importantly you have to divorce yourself from "of the world" and draw closer to an intimate relationship with Jesus. Instead of watching inane television or surfing the web, go out in the beautiful world God created for us and read spiritual books. Empty yourself of the culture and fill yourself up with the spiritual. If you draw closer to his sacred heart you will begin to untwist what has been twisted.

Somethings that have helped me. When you get those sexual thoughts swirling around in your head invite Jesus into the thoughts with you.
Sign up for a set hour of adoration if you have perpetual at a church near you. Make it a commitment to be there every week at the same time.
The most powerful for me I joined a catholic men's group called TheKingsmen.org where we meat weekly and talk about these issues. Challenging each other to live a life of virtue. It's important especially as a guy to surround yourself with men who are striving for the same thing you are.

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Mar 23rd 2013 new

I ment "meet weekly" not meat weekly" this abstaing on friday is starting to affect my brain eyebrow

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Mar 23rd 2013 new
(Quote) Jerry-74383 said: Have no fear, Tom: her statement about third base applies to second base as well. And first....
(Quote) Jerry-74383 said:



Have no fear, Tom: her statement about third base applies to second base as well. And first.



--hide--


well lets let her speak for herself.

and i disagree about 1st.
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Mar 23rd 2013 new

I usually have two methods for clearing my mind when any temptations to impurity begin for me.


Usually, I call on our Blessed Lord (mentally or vocally): "Precious Blood of Jesus, wash over me!". This is the best method that I know of for driving away impure thoughts quickly and totally.


Also, I sometimes use a self-exorcism prayer: "In the Name of Jesus Christ, I bind thee, spirit of lust, and send thee to the foor of the cross to be judged by Our Lord."

(Quote) Rob-593818 said: Jesus said to us "Be in the world but not of the world.If your "of the world" yo...
(Quote) Rob-593818 said:

Jesus said to us "Be in the world but not of the world.
If your "of the world" your going to have a hard time remaining chaste.
Christopher west mentioned in his series on "Theology of the Body" that true freeedom is the ability to say yes and no when givin a choice.
If you can only say yes to that choice ie acting out on your sexual desires than you are dealing with and addiction.
So guess what, because of contraception and abortion and the media jamming sex, sex, sex down are throats for the last 50 years we have a world full of sex addicts. Women have been reduced to body parts and are dressing accordingly (skin tight yoga pants aren't helping ladies) What we've been told and what we think is just the natural response to sexual longings are actually more the cravings of an addiction. Are brain waves have been twisted and reordered.

What do addicts do to get their fix. They lie twist the truth "It's not a baby, it's a fetus" "What I do in the privacy of my own home's not hurting anyone" They sell out their family often stealing from them ect.. Yeah I love my kids but I really need to have this women in work or watch this pornography, I won't get caught."

So we need to untwist what has been twisted. As some have said trying to be chaste because we don't want to go to hell is not what Our Lord want's. We are approacing God out of fear not in love. Plus it's unhealthy, trying to block out all sexual thoughts all day can lead to anxiety and scuplosity. God put sexual emotion in us he deemed it good. If you see and attractive women the initial emotion of attraction is good it's not a sin. It's what you do with that emotion ie fantasizing about that women with your wife standing right next to you, is where the sin lies.

So how do we be chaste in an unchasted world. Lay it at the foot of the cross. "broad is the path that leads to destruction, narrow is the path that leads to eternal life". What's the broad path, - pride, What's the narrow path - humility. You can't do it yourself. like many have said you must utilize the tools the church has givin us, confession, the Eucharist, Adoration, Our lady, The rosary. Most importantly you have to divorce yourself from "of the world" and draw closer to an intimate relationship with Jesus. Instead of watching inane television or surfing the web, go out in the beautiful world God created for us and read spiritual books. Empty yourself of the culture and fill yourself up with the spiritual. If you draw closer to his sacred heart you will begin to untwist what has been twisted.

Somethings that have helped me. When you get those sexual thoughts swirling around in your head invite Jesus into the thoughts with you.
Sign up for a set hour of adoration if you have perpetual at a church near you. Make it a commitment to be there every week at the same time.
The most powerful for me I joined a catholic men's group called TheKingsmen.org where we meat weekly and talk about these issues. Challenging each other to live a life of virtue. It's important especially as a guy to surround yourself with men who are striving for the same thing you are.

--hide--


That was excellent, Rob! Thank you!

LOCKED
Mar 23rd 2013 new

Nicely said Rob!

Humans are great justifiers, and our current culture is great at helping everyone justify sex as a recreational right.

One of the most important things I think we humans need to understand, not only the moral teachings on sex and its legitimate and holy use, but how our bodies are designed and function. We operate so under the assumption that we are the masters of our world, our life, our future, our bodies. And, we have translated this into surrender to lust and greed and gluttony and disregard for the way the world is designed to work. And, we are reaping the benefits of unforeseen consequences not only with our bodies but with the world in general.

We haved failed to be good stewards of our bodies and our world, mistaking the fallacy of control and domination of resources toward selfish wants instead of for tending and nurturing and facilitating the natural toward its ordained purpose and that includes us.

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Mar 23rd 2013 new

(Quote) Marian-83994 said: Thanks for your post Tara.
(Quote) Marian-83994 said:



Thanks for your post Tara.

--hide--


I recommended this in the women's room, but I'll post here as well. I just started this book yesterday, and it's been inspiring so far. I actually got it from the library but will probably buy my own copy or download to my Kindle. Yes, there is a chapter on sexual purity and chastity. wink

www.amazon.com

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Mar 23rd 2013 new

(Quote) Pat-5351 said: So, what is your best piece of advice to an adult trying to live a chaste and pure life? How c...
(Quote) Pat-5351 said:

So, what is your best piece of advice to an adult trying to live a chaste and pure life?

How can we as adult (not teenaged) Catholics help ourselves to save our souls from the sins of impurity?

I will go first:

Wear on your person a blessed sacramental at all times. The miraculous medal, the brown scapular, a crucifix (not a cross, a crucifix). Wear it always, not taking it off for anything. There is grace and power in sacramentals, and it is a physical reminder of to Whom you belong, and Who has given you this body, and Who dwells within you.

If you are tempted, you will have to, as an act of your will, physiclaly remove this sacramental if you are to proceed with whatever you were going to do. It will be a physical sign that you are separating yourself from God, that you are doing it willingly, with full knowledge. That's enough to give you pause and a chance to change your mind.

--hide--


Try to make better choices to be able to be chaste and pure in your daily life.

For example if I went to hooters by myself because it is a place where there are a lot of single men eating by themselves...I shouldn't be looking at the waitresses in a lustful way. Many women that I have met that seemed by appearance to be impure are actually quite loving and want a loving man with Christian values as much an out of shape woman that doesn't take as much care of her physique.

If I saw a woman at the YMCA with a beautiful body wearing a miraculous medal I am not sure if I would look at her any differently...probably still with some lust. I would probably have more respect for the woman though and might make more of an effort to meet her since I would know that she is a Christian.

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Mar 23rd 2013 new

(Quote) Jerry-74383 said: Have no fear, Tom: her statement about third base applies to second base as well. And fir...
(Quote) Jerry-74383 said:

Have no fear, Tom: her statement about third base applies to second base as well. And first.

--hide--


ALL of the bases are off-limits, not just the home run!

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Mar 23rd 2013 new

(Quote) Marian-83994 said: I appreciate your candor. It has been communicated to me that if we post our interest in ...
(Quote) Marian-83994 said:



I appreciate your candor. It has been communicated to me that if we post our interest in chastity on these forums, in front of strangers- that no one will want to date us. Is this something you or anyone HERE agrees with? ......SO that statement supports the idea that we can't REALLY be honest here about any of this.

--hide--


No worries! I wouldn't want to date him either! Been there, done that... no missionary dating for me!

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Mar 23rd 2013 new

(Quote) Jerry-74383 said: (Quote) Bob-59786 said: The agenda I saw began w/ "Getting Laid"....
(Quote) Jerry-74383 said:

Quote:
Bob-59786 said:

The agenda I saw began w/ "Getting Laid". You can find the rest on the Intenet. The list I saw included bondage, gay and lesbian sex.


That's the tame stuff. Apparently sex week at Yale includes talks on topics such has bestiality.

--hide--


I did not look up the actual agenda. It seems that since 1997 when I took a course in sex therapy for my field of study, these things are now being discussed in a different light, at least as far as these events go.

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