Faith Focused Dating. Create your Free Profile and meet your Match! Sign Up for Free
A place to learn, mingle, and share

Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Mar 19th 2013 new

(Quote) John-220051 said: I can be the quiet type a lot of the time, and on occasion I struggle for things to talk about when I mee...
(Quote) John-220051 said: I can be the quiet type a lot of the time, and on occasion I struggle for things to talk about when I meet women. Any suggestions for becoming a better conversationalist?

Part of my problem is that I'm a thinker. Most women I meet probably aren't. What are some ideas for helping me to broaden my conversation?
--hide--

Dating is a means of encouraging and building comfort, attraction and emotional connections (be it in cyber world or real world). Be natural and behave like a real gentleman. Most women are actually open and receptive, and are happy to engage in conversation. Most of them are open to talking to you, on just about any subject. But, if you meet a woman who is also like you who struggle for things to talk about, a thinker (can think but cannot speak out), or shy, the date is doomed. You have to find out some ways somehow to break the ice and make your date time worthy of your time consumed.





Mar 19th 2013 new

(Quote) John-220051 said: I can be the quiet type a lot of the time, and on occasion I struggle for things to talk about when I mee...
(Quote) John-220051 said: I can be the quiet type a lot of the time, and on occasion I struggle for things to talk about when I meet women. Any suggestions for becoming a better conversationalist?

Part of my problem is that I'm a thinker. Most women I meet probably aren't. What are some ideas for helping me to broaden my conversation?
--hide--

John, here are some suggestions that could help you broaden your conversation with your date mate, so that the conversation/date won't be a "stalemate". Speak clearly, look at her in the eyes, show interest on the topic, don't talk too fast or too slow and listen well. Ask your date questions that requires some kind of elaboration in the response, and not simply a "yes" or "no" answer. Make sure that whatever you ask will lead into a deeper conversation, because that will help you break through any hesitancy to talk. Learn to rephrase your questions so that they won’t sound like an “interview for a job” or “prying” questions that could make her uncomfortable. Avoid debatable and very personal questions. Ask her some interesting and fun questions instead, e.g. “If you could do anything you wish, what would you wish to do?” If you are allowed to make three wishes, what would they be? Then follow-up with another question like “Why did you chose that wish (blah blah) as number1…that wish as number 2…that wish as number 3?" “They said that there is more chance of a person to be strike by lightning rather than winning the lottery. What do you think of that?” “If you hit the jackpot in a lottery, what will you do with all that money? Will you keep it all, share some to relatives and friends or give some to charities?” Humor her, crack some jokes that make her smile/laugh during a lull moment so as to "break the ice" (even if it is not the best) just so you can both enjoy a good chuckle. Ask her about something timely (current events and issues) that's going on in the media, in sports, in pop culture; or even at CM…what does she think about a certain topic/subject in the forum or the blog. Look at your surroundings…admire them or make some comments about them, they can induce a positive conversation and gently ease toward common topics. Talk about your shared interests. Talk about what you’re passionate about and why, then ask her in return. Try and figure out what her hopes and dreams are. Take care to guide the conversation towards the things she finds interesting, this helps you find out who she is as well. Be curious but cautious. Compliment your date but give a sincere compliment, women can detect if your compliments are sincere or not. A conversation get more interesting if both of you ask each other questions. A good conversation should be a give and take...exchanging ideas, interests etc. If she don't ask you a question voluntarily, offer her to ask you any questions and that you will gladly answer them.

Check these links, hopefully they can help you with your problem re: becoming a better conversationalist biggrin
www.toastmasters.org
www.matilijapress.com
www.standupandspeakto.us

Mar 19th 2013 new

(Quote) John-220051 said: I didn't say women aren't thinkers. It's just that I tend to read a lot of things tha...
(Quote) John-220051 said:

I didn't say women aren't thinkers. It's just that I tend to read a lot of things that are rather bookish for lack of a better term. I'm trying to broaden my conversation beyond deep intellectual pursuits.
--hide--


LOL I can help you with that - watch a show like Walking Dead then discuss the ethical dilemmas the characters face. :) Pop culture plus deep intellectualism. I hope you like zombies.

Mar 19th 2013 new
(Quote) Naomi-698107 said: And if you really want to wow the ladies, talk about their age, the obviousness of their gray hairs and...
(Quote) Naomi-698107 said:

And if you really want to wow the ladies, talk about their age, the obviousness of their gray hairs and if they want a gym membership for valentines day instead of the traditional box of chocolates.

--hide--
All your suggestions are sooo funny. Thanks for the ideas
Mar 19th 2013 new

And another thing: wink

If you know the lady has children or grandchildren, or if she mentions them, ask how many or how old or boys vs. girls.

But don't ask anything further on the first couple of dates.

Too much interest in someone's kids makes a woman feel you may be a predator. (Not making this up, I've seen it discussed in all-women forums.)

Mar 19th 2013 new

(Quote) Naomi-698107 said: I'm working on melee combat and bludgeoning weaponry. Guns have the problem of runni...
(Quote) Naomi-698107 said:

I'm working on melee combat and bludgeoning weaponry. Guns have the problem of running out of ammo, and as cool samurai swords and machetes are, you run the risk of the blade dulling, and it can't be easy to constantly swing at the power required to decapitate the undead menace.

Crowbars are my top choice. Their construction and material will give it a longer life, won't likely bend like a golf club or shatter like a wooden bat, ie. cricket or baseball bat. You also get the added bonus of having a tool for jimmying. The pointy end you can ram right through the zombie's eye socket as well as the option to go the traditional beating route.

--hide--

Naomi, this made me grin and giggle. I love zombies and my nephew and I go back and forth about being prepared for the coming apocalypse :-). We are teaming up and making plans lol. We go back and forth on facebook trading tips etc. His friends thought I was some crazy person posting him at first, but I told them I was his Aunt and then they thought it was cool, lol, so every once in awhile they send me tips or zombie memes -- pretty cute LOL

Mar 19th 2013 new

(Quote) Marge-938695 said: But keep it CLEAN.
(Quote) Marge-938695 said:

But keep it CLEAN.

--hide--

Unless the punch line has mud in it :-)

Mar 19th 2013 new

(Quote) Lauren-927923 said: Naomi, this made me grin and giggle. I love zombies and my nephew and I go back and for...
(Quote) Lauren-927923 said:

Naomi, this made me grin and giggle. I love zombies and my nephew and I go back and forth about being prepared for the coming apocalypse :-). We are teaming up and making plans lol. We go back and forth on facebook trading tips etc. His friends thought I was some crazy person posting him at first, but I told them I was his Aunt and then they thought it was cool, lol, so every once in awhile they send me tips or zombie memes -- pretty cute LOL

--hide--
Hehe, awesome. Hiding behind the interwebs, unfortunately, leads a lot of individuals to assume I'm a guy. *scoff* because we all know women are helpless damsels in distress with those pointy hats and the sheer fabric poking out the top.

Kinda like a dunce cap, ay?

Mar 19th 2013 new

(Quote) Marge-938695 said: Well, phooey. I was going to ask Ray to put me in his will.
(Quote) Marge-938695 said:

Well, phooey. I was going to ask Ray to put me in his will.

--hide--
Well, Marge -- you can be included. I'll share some of my independent wealth with you. Sure hate to bust that heirloom piggy bank though.

Mar 19th 2013 new

(Quote) Lea-938919 said: John, here are some suggestions that could help you broaden your conve...
(Quote) Lea-938919 said:


John, here are some suggestions that could help you broaden your conversation with your date mate, so that the conversation/date won't be a "stalemate". Speak clearly, look at her in the eyes, show interest on the topic, don't talk too fast or too slow and listen well. Ask your date questions that requires some kind of elaboration in the response, and not simply a "yes" or "no" answer. Make sure that whatever you ask will lead into a deeper conversation, because that will help you break through any hesitancy to talk. Learn to rephrase your questions so that they won’t sound like an “interview for a job” or “prying” questions that could make her uncomfortable. Avoid debatable and very personal questions. Ask her some interesting and fun questions instead, e.g. “If you could do anything you wish, what would you wish to do?” If you are allowed to make three wishes, what would they be? Then follow-up with another question like “Why did you chose that wish (blah blah) as number1…that wish as number 2…that wish as number 3?" “They said that there is more chance of a person to be strike by lightning rather than winning the lottery. What do you think of that?” “If you hit the jackpot in a lottery, what will you do with all that money? Will you keep it all, share some to relatives and friends or give some to charities?” Humor her, crack some jokes that make her smile/laugh during a lull moment so as to "break the ice" (even if it is not the best) just so you can both enjoy a good chuckle. Ask her about something timely (current events and issues) that's going on in the media, in sports, in pop culture; or even at CM…what does she think about a certain topic/subject in the forum or the blog. Look at your surroundings…admire them or make some comments about them, they can induce a positive conversation and gently ease toward common topics. Talk about your shared interests. Talk about what you’re passionate about and why, then ask her in return. Try and figure out what her hopes and dreams are. Take care to guide the conversation towards the things she finds interesting, this helps you find out who she is as well. Be curious but cautious. Compliment your date but give a sincere compliment, women can detect if your compliments are sincere or not. A conversation get more interesting if both of you ask each other questions. A good conversation should be a give and take...exchanging ideas, interests etc. If she don't ask you a question voluntarily, offer her to ask you any questions and that you will gladly answer them.

Check these links, hopefully they can help you with your problem re: becoming a better conversationalist
www.toastmasters.org
www.matilijapress.com
www.standupandspeakto.us

--hide--
John, take Lea along.

Actually, why not ask her out?

Posts 61 - 70 of 112