I currently have a thread going in the women's forum, but would appreciate hearing a man't point of view. I had exchanged (at current count) 32 messages with a man, had about 4 phone calls which added up to 9 hours of conversation, he was talking about coming up to Chicago to meet me in early April, we seem to be very compatible in terms of attraction, intelligence, professions, Catholic devotion, age, wanting to get married, etc. Monday night I found out that he has gone on 6 dates with a woman who has told him that she is not ready for a committment and is, in fact, interested in someone from another continent. And, today, he told me that he has not stopped dating her. So, I told him that I am not willing to meet someone who is currrently dating someone, but if he does at some point end the relationship, he can send me an email message (as he has my private email address and phone number, and if I am available, we can discuss meeting. I also told him that I am in conversation with 2 other gentlemen (which is indeed true). I just don't want to play these dating games anymore. My preference is to meet someone and see if there is any interest on both parts to pursue a relationship, and then, if not, to then move on to someone else. I truly don't understand this dating and meeting multiple women as he is also apparently conversing with and meeting other women (and, he is relatively new to CM). He states that the women he is talking to (in their 50's and early 60's all say that they are meeting and dating several people which I truly find hard to believe, and that I am the only one that is unwilling to meet someone who is dating someone currently (6 times plus) and apparently physically intimate (at least more than hugging and a kiss on the cheek from what he told me!).
I would love to hear what men have to say about this, and also what women in their 50's and 60's have to say about this.
It won't change what I do. I will not meet someone who is currently dating someone.
Thanks in advance for any/all of your input. I am somewhat upset by all this, as I didn't realize that I had to ask someone directly if they were dating/ in a relationship if they approached me, exchanged 32 messages with me, spent 9 hours on the phone with me (in great conversation, by the way), and wanted to come to Chicago to meet me (living far enough away to have to fly or have a very long drive/train ride!) I am also sad about this, as I truly thought this was the right guy for me!