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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Mar 24th 2013 new

(Quote) Shara-929649 said: 12) Where do you see yourself in 10 years? 13) What do you value most in life 14) I...
(Quote) Shara-929649 said:

12) Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

13) What do you value most in life

14) If you daughter was marrying you what would be your caution

15) How do you prefer to communicate

16) How do you handle disagreements or conflict

17) What do you think of the concepts of each spouse is a servant to each other and what does that mean to you

18) How do you like your spouse to dress

19) What is your body care routine like in terms of exercise, eating habits and grooming

20) What is you attitude towards divorce and or marital conflict

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Shara, are you just going to interview him? Can't these questions be answered as you get to know one another? For me, actions speak louder than words...and talk is cheap:) Anyone can talk a good game, but can you live it? That's the challenge!

Mar 24th 2013 new
Why do you assume that the Holy Father and Tradition are at odds? To assume this means you have no idea what loyal traditionalists think or stand for. As for lists. I think you are driving yourself into a corner. Get out and date!! Meet people. Use your gut.
Mar 24th 2013 new

(Quote) Lisa-572677 said: Shara, are you just going to interview him? Can't these questions be answered as you ...
(Quote) Lisa-572677 said:

Shara, are you just going to interview him? Can't these questions be answered as you get to know one another? For me, actions speak louder than words...and talk is cheap:) Anyone can talk a good game, but can you live it? That's the challenge!

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LOL. Of course not Lisa. I am just saying that these are things that should be brought up naturally in conversation as information you should try to know about someone before marriage. I would NEVER advocate interviewing someone. It is just a framework of what I should know about someone that could impact my future marriage. That is all. Apologies if it implied that I was just going to sit there and ask questions. I think that if you know someone well enough that you are interested in seeing if they could be the one it should be easy to be able to bring these things up naturally in conversation. Communication afterall is key in marriage. Again apologies for the mix-up of what I was implying.

Mar 24th 2013 new

(Quote) Shara-929649 said: So you think that you have met someone who might possibly be a candidate for " THE ONE"...
(Quote) Shara-929649 said:

So you think that you have met someone who might possibly be a candidate for " THE ONE" What next????

As single and prudent Catholics we know (or should know) that this is where the hard work begins. The discernment process and the process of determining compatibility. What are some of the things you feel are essential to ask your significant other before talk or thoughts of marriage begin?

I just want to be prepared in case it happens to me. I did check out some websites but many of them are not geared specifically to Catholic marriage so I thought to ask the CM crowd and also hopefully compile a helpful list of things for all of us. It is so important in our single life and in our transition to our vocation and or discernment of it, to use wisdom. Let us share some important questions that all Catholic Singles should have in their back pocket just in case that special someone sneaks up on them.

+JMJ+

+AMDG+

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I like this topic Shara! Here are my additions:

What are some of the key experiences - good and bad - that have shaped you most?

Can you share with me about your prayer life? How would you describe your spirituality?

Who is someone that is a good example of faith for you?

What is the best decision you have made (other than to date me of course wink )?

What has been the biggest challenge in your life? How did you overcome it?

What are you most proud of in your life?



Mar 24th 2013 new

(Quote) Tim-734178 said: Why do you assume that the Holy Father and Tradition are at odds? To assume this means you have no idea wh...
(Quote) Tim-734178 said: Why do you assume that the Holy Father and Tradition are at odds? To assume this means you have no idea what loyal traditionalists think or stand for. As for lists. I think you are driving yourself into a corner. Get out and date!! Meet people. Use your gut.
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I am not "assuming" (because you know what happens when you assume wink laughing ) My post is referring to individual people in regards to the view on the church and in respective a potential match. That is like assuming that every 7/7 follows and practices the teaching of the church in regards to faith to faith and morals. The topic were questions that would be asked regarding Catholics in regards to moving toward marriage.

As I indicated I have met couples on CM where many start out in a relationship with great potential but it ends because one cannot look beyond their views in regard to the Traditional (I am not going to use initials in case I make a mistake and get some people irate) vs the Catholic Church of today. This is something that needs to be addressed from the very onset.

In fact there are couples that have combined the two but it takes work, openness and true charity where God and the church is at the center and not each other's views or interpretation.




Mar 24th 2013 new

(Quote) Tim-734178 said: Why do you assume that the Holy Father and Tradition are at odds? To assume this means you have no idea wh...
(Quote) Tim-734178 said: Why do you assume that the Holy Father and Tradition are at odds? To assume this means you have no idea what loyal traditionalists think or stand for. As for lists. I think you are driving yourself into a corner. Get out and date!! Meet people. Use your gut.
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Matt, Shara is not talking about finding a person by dating, she is asking what questions would be helpful in the event after dating you find one person who you would like to go deeper to see if this person is the one you are "moving towards marriage. "

Sometimes dating is the easy part, the next step is dating the person that you want it to go to another level.

Mar 24th 2013 new

(Quote) Mary-25961 said: 3) As happened in more than open budding relationship on CM, do you follow Pope Francis or do you f...
(Quote) Mary-25961 said:

3) As happened in more than open budding relationship on CM, do you follow Pope Francis or do you follow the traditional church. If so, do you feel that you are able to come to a meeting in the middle and be open.

There is a big difference between spirituality and living one' Catholic Faith.

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These are good questions.


The one I have a problem with, respectfully, is the above one posted by Mary. It assumes that all traditional church attendees DO NOT follow Pope Francis, and there is not necessarily a divide there. It stereotypes people too readily and that is not necessarily the truth. Please be more careful how you phrase questions in the future. This could start up another one of the not-so-nice threads that have been on the forums lately.

Mar 24th 2013 new

(Quote) Shara-929649 said: LOL. Of course not Lisa. I am just saying that these are things that should be brought u...
(Quote) Shara-929649 said:

LOL. Of course not Lisa. I am just saying that these are things that should be brought up naturally in conversation as information you should try to know about someone before marriage. I would NEVER advocate interviewing someone. It is just a framework of what I should know about someone that could impact my future marriage. That is all. Apologies if it implied that I was just going to sit there and ask questions. I think that if you know someone well enough that you are interested in seeing if they could be the one it should be easy to be able to bring these things up naturally in conversation. Communication afterall is key in marriage. Again apologies for the mix-up of what I was implying.

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I also believe this will come up naturally in conversation, or can be brought up deliberately without being an interrogation.


I did go on a date with a man from my church a few years ago. Simple coffee shop date that lasted over 5 hours. He likely did not have a lot of experience with courting women so he figuratively pulled out his (mental) interview list and proceeded to ask me many, too personal, questions for a first date. He was interviewing me for his "potential spouse". I liked him so I tried to be patient with that, but admittedly I was exhausted within a short period of time and not able to think clearly (otherwise I would have left long before the 5 hour mark). When I did try to end things politely and say good-bye, he seemed hurt so I stayed longer. Needless to say, we did not go out again, but I do know he liked me for some time after that. The funny thing is he is now married to someone who pursued him for a very long time. Hopefully their communication styles will be similar.

Mar 24th 2013 new

Question based on what came up is:


Would your preference for the traditionalist form of Mass mean that you would not appreciate the children and I going to other forms of Catholic Masses and would you gowith us?

Mar 24th 2013 new

(Quote) Sherrill-anne-13557 said: Question based on what came up is: Would your preference for the traditionalist...
(Quote) Sherrill-anne-13557 said:

Question based on what came up is:


Would your preference for the traditionalist form of Mass mean that you would not appreciate the children and I going to other forms of Catholic Masses and would you gowith us?

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sorry. go with us

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