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A place to learn, mingle, and share

Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Mar 31st 2013 new

(Quote) David-622846 said: The love sick feeling on average goes away after two years (First chapters of the book I mentione...
(Quote) David-622846 said:

The love sick feeling on average goes away after two years (First chapters of the book I mentioned show a study about it) Its not bad to be love sick but not everything. I don't talk about marriage right away because I believe in discernment using faith and reason. Reason to me should be longer than 5 dates.. Just my thought :)

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You will talk when you have found the right one, not ask her to marry you straight away maybe, but about incorporating her into your future plans and when you see her sure you will ask her to marry.

Mar 31st 2013 new

(Quote) David-622846 said: The love sick feeling on average goes away after two years (First chapters of the book I mentione...
(Quote) David-622846 said:

The love sick feeling on average goes away after two years (First chapters of the book I mentioned show a study about it) Its not bad to be love sick but not everything. I don't talk about marriage right away because I believe in discernment using faith and reason. Reason to me should be longer than 5 dates.. Just my thought :)

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You are a wise and discerning man!!

Mar 31st 2013 new

My favorite part of the article was the statement, "According to the findings, the average British man falls in love just over three times in his life while the average woman falls in love only once." Is this why men leave their wives for other women whereas women do so less frequently? I have to agree with this statement.



Mar 31st 2013 new

(Quote) Joan-529855 said: (Quote) David-622846 said: The love sick feeling on average goes away after...
(Quote) Joan-529855 said:

Quote:
David-622846 said:

The love sick feeling on average goes away after two years (First chapters of the book I mentioned show a study about it) Its not bad to be love sick but not everything. I don't talk about marriage right away because I believe in discernment using faith and reason. Reason to me should be longer than 5 dates.. Just my thought :)



You are a wise and discerning man!!

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Certainly, putting this in prayer is a wise advice.

Mar 31st 2013 new

(Quote) Jane-933948 said: I met my husband through work and first over the phone, then in person. I "knew" when I ...
(Quote) Jane-933948 said:

I met my husband through work and first over the phone, then in person. I "knew" when I talked with him over the phone and he said the same thing. When we met for the first time at work, we both knew. One of his colleagues pointed it out to us, he said it was so obvious. And the rest is history. I wonder will it ever happen again?

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lovestruck! Praying

Mar 31st 2013 new

(Quote) Ray-566531 said: As many things as grandmas know, I think yours wasn't quite on target with this belief. While t...
(Quote) Ray-566531 said:

As many things as grandmas know, I think yours wasn't quite on target with this belief. While there may be strong feelings and attraction, a person needs time to really get to know another, especially if it involves a lifelong commitment. Wanting to mess around? There might be some truth in that, but I think most men (not including boys here) will respect a woman and help keep her virtue intact. There are exceptions, of course.

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Hello Ray, I can see you point! and you are right! My point is that after her life experiences, she met grandpa, who was in the military and stopped by by chance to have breakfast in her hometown. It was love at first sight. Then the dated some years because it was the civil war in Spain so they were separated most of the time. My grandma probably made this point because some daughters dated men for a long time and they never mentioned anything about marriage, eventually, of course they weren't married. If a man is serious about marriage he will let you know he would like to get to know you better for that noble reason, to discern together if thats the case. This article is very secular and maybe I made a mistake because I am getting some of you confused. boggled My point was that whether for secular reasons or very noble reasons like wanting to get married, the title of the article is a very valid point too. theheart

Mar 31st 2013 new

(Quote) Marge-938695 said: They do?
(Quote) Marge-938695 said:

They do?

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laughing laughing laughing

Not in my lifetime it would seem!

Mar 31st 2013 new

(Quote) Carol-737878 said: Jane, I first met my former husband over the phone, too. He had such a deep voice & that intr...
(Quote) Carol-737878 said:

Jane, I first met my former husband over the phone, too. He had such a deep voice & that intrigued me. After we met in person for our first date, I couldn't remember what he looked like, but I remembered his voice. We married 3 months later. Our marriage lasted 25 years before he decided he wanted a new life.

This guy I'm seeing that I met here on CM, I was intrigued by his profile picture. It seemed I could look directly into his eyes & his eyes held the impression of kindness and just a touch of a smile. Who knows how this friendship will turn out?

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Sorry to hear about your former husband doing that to you sad

Mar 31st 2013 new

(Quote) Joan-529855 said: My favorite part of the article was the statement, "According to the findings, the aver...
(Quote) Joan-529855 said:

My favorite part of the article was the statement, "According to the findings, the average British man falls in love just over three times in his life while the average woman falls in love only once." Is this why men leave their wives for other women whereas women do so less frequently? I have to agree with this statement.



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I don't think it's love men are falling into, but lust. It's unfortunate that given all the advancements of civilization that we still have instincts that really have no place in our species, and the male biological urge to procreate with as many women as possible is still in our genetic make-up.

I don't think it's a fair assessment to say that men tend to move faster than women in terms of moving the relationship along. There's been times in my life where I didn't immediately find a girl attractive, but over time I discovered the qualities that made them attractive. I know some girls in my life who moved much faster than the guys in their relationships. I know one guy in particular who I worked with who was being chased by a girl who worked with us and he confided in me how he really wasn't looking for a relationship but because of her persistance he eventually came around. Now they've been in a great relationship for 3 years and still going strong.

One last thought: I believe that perhaps why guys/girls tend to say that they knew the other was the one almost right off the bat is a manifestation of the hindsight bias. Hindsight bias, for those of you who don't know, is when you're presented with new information and you say, "Oh I already knew that" when in fact you didn't. You just think you did because the information makes sense and so obviously you must've already known it. Again, doesn't apply to everyone, but I think that's a reason why a lot of people say that.

Mar 31st 2013 new

(Quote) Sol-496426 said: but women need at least six. www.dailymail.co.uk.
(Quote) Sol-496426 said:

but women need at least six.

www.dailymail.co.uk

My grandma used to say if a man has not talked about marriage within 5 dates, he wants to mess around. I can see why.

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In my opinion, I think the "marriage talk" should only happen as both parties are comfortable. Granted, in the previous relationship I was in, we would make light-hearted comments about it, but we never had a SERIOUS discussion regarding that topic. I'm sure if we would have been together long, it would have come up.

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