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Devoted to discussion pertaining to those issues which are specifically relevant to people under 45. Topics must have a specific perspective of people in this age group for it to be on topic.

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Apr 5th 2013 new

(Quote) Andy-896770 said: Is there anyone else out there who has this problem: Every person you want to date is called...
(Quote) Andy-896770 said:

Is there anyone else out there who has this problem: Every person you want to date is called to the religious or celebate lifestyle


I'm sure God is trying to tell me something here but I'm not sure what. This is the 4th time this is happening to me and I can't think of what reason God has for putting me through this time and time again. I'm all for women becoming nuns- that is a very noble cause but it's no fun being caught in the middle of it. I’m in a love triangle with Jesus and of course He’ll always win being the creator of the universe and all, lol. I would almost feel better if I was rejected for being a jerk because at least then I'd be able to go to confession, learn from my mistakes and move on. But if niether person is at fault and the reason for breakup is a religious vocation how is there healing? And have I been doing anything wrong in my dating habits?

--hide--

So let me get this straight, all 4 of these young women are women you have actually courted? I mean, were they each courted to the point that each time you stated your intentions and the young lady accepted? If that is the case, love the Christ and his holy Bride more than yourself, and you will be content. Also, these ladies are probably just postulants at this point, if they each is even to that point. Each yet would have a ways to go.

Also, if you are attracted to women who aren't available for you because, specifically, they are drawn to be brides for Christ and/or they are drawn to the religious life (hopefully it is both), I wonder if there isn't something latent yet in you that attracts you to each of them that you have not yet discovered in yourself. Pray to know the Holy Will of God for yourself in general, as to whether or not He even wants you to be married. Maybe He is calling YOU to something else and you've not yet acquiesed to be open to that possibility.

You are young yet. At my age, I have met men who are attracted to pious women because they don't wish to be full-time pious themselves. They often, not always, project this desire into their attraction. Unfortunately, liking someone pious doesn't necessarily make you pious. It can actually cause you to be a bad influence on them, possibly, or a destraction for the work that you need to do for yourself spiritually. I am not saying that this is your situation, but it is something I have seen as being not too uncommon.

Apr 7th 2013 new

Thank you all biggrin This is very encouraging biggrin

Apr 7th 2013 new

(Quote) Lynea-297530 said: So let me get this straight, all 4 of these young women are women you have actu...
(Quote) Lynea-297530 said:

So let me get this straight, all 4 of these young women are women you have actually courted? I mean, were they each courted to the point that each time you stated your intentions and the young lady accepted? If that is the case, love the Christ and his holy Bride more than yourself, and you will be content. Also, these ladies are probably just postulants at this point, if they each is even to that point. Each yet would have a ways to go.

Also, if you are attracted to women who aren't available for you because, specifically, they are drawn to be brides for Christ and/or they are drawn to the religious life (hopefully it is both), I wonder if there isn't something latent yet in you that attracts you to each of them that you have not yet discovered in yourself. Pray to know the Holy Will of God for yourself in general, as to whether or not He even wants you to be married. Maybe He is calling YOU to something else and you've not yet acquiesed to be open to that possibility.

You are young yet. At my age, I have met men who are attracted to pious women because they don't wish to be full-time pious themselves. They often, not always, project this desire into their attraction. Unfortunately, liking someone pious doesn't necessarily make you pious. It can actually cause you to be a bad influence on them, possibly, or a destraction for the work that you need to do for yourself spiritually. I am not saying that this is your situation, but it is something I have seen as being not too uncommon.

--hide--

Actually, Lynea, let me be more specific:


The first girl was called to be single/ lay celibate and we were friends for 5 year before I tried asking her out and she had to turn me down.

The second was a true religious sister calling I went to prom with and wished I could ask her out but didn't attempt it already knowing her calling.

The third I'm not sure exactly why turned me down when I tried asking her, but she came from a breakup relationship but still good friends with him, loved Jesus and refused to hang out with guys so I'm only guessing she's trying to be single/lay celibate.

The fourth girl I met on CM and used to be protestant and her parents (who are still protestant) did not want her to be a nun so she joined CM, but when her perents moved away she decided to be more serious about it; we are still great friends though.


So I have never officially dated or courted (or at least never had a true girlfriend)

Now, as far as the religious calling for me is highly unlikely because of various reasons:

1) I scored a zero in celibacy on the Spiritual Gifts Inventory

2) I felt God was forcing me to become a priest and it is not God that forces

3)I am enthusiastic about Theology of the Body!

4) wanting to raise a big family is one of my dreams even though I know it won't be easy

5) I feel that if I didn't up married I would be miserable for the rest of my life

Apr 7th 2013 new

Oh and one more thing:


6) I believe God has put a lot of love in my heart to give to some deserving woman who wants to accept it.

Apr 7th 2013 new

Been there, done that. I was nicknamed the priest maker in college. Three of the guys I liked a lot, including one I seriously considered dating, are in their 2nd or 3rd year of seminary.

The way I look at it now, is when I DO get married, I'll have lots of priests at my wedding and hopefully one of my best friends celebrating the Mass!

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