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Discussion related to living as a Catholic in the single state of life. As long as a topic is being discussed from the perspective of a single Catholic then it will be on-topic.

Tobias and Sarah's story is from the Book of Tobit, and his journey is guided by Saint Raphael.
Learn More: Tobias & Sarah as led by Saint Raphael

Apr 17th 2013 new
*one was, but the other wasn't
Apr 17th 2013 new

(Quote) Dan-656122 said: Wow. Lots o' responses. Thank you everybody for all your input. It's greatly appreciated!
(Quote) Dan-656122 said:

Wow. Lots o' responses. Thank you everybody for all your input. It's greatly appreciated!

So, I'm yet to go back, but I plan on going tonight and God willing she'll be working and I'll just ask her out for coffee, if she's not working, then c'est la vie. I know not everyone is the same and she might not appreciate it if a customer asked her out, but I've heard from women (outside of CM) who've said they wouldn't mind being asked out on a date by a customer. So, I figure I'll go for it..........that's if I conjure up the guts. I'm not one to just walk up to a woman and ask her out, so it's going to be tough, but I'm praying for courage.

I understand the concern about asking someone out in a secular setting, she can be one of many things, anywhere from a satanic worshipper to a devout Catholic woman. It's a risk in asking her out, but when I'm drawn into a woman like I was with her, then I want to know what's there. I'd make sure to cover the basic on the first coffee date, like her age, faith, pro-life. The contraception question would have to be addressed during a later date. If she's not what I'm looking for then it's like some have mentioned, that it's just coffee and at least I know and was able to enjoy her company.

--hide--


scratchchin Inquiring minds want to know...was she there...did you ask... smile

Apr 18th 2013 new

(Quote) Dan-656122 said: ... I'm not one to just walk up to a woman and ask her out ...
(Quote) Dan-656122 said:

... I'm not one to just walk up to a woman and ask her out ...

--hide--

I don't think it will be possible to do the latter,

without doing the former. smile

Apr 18th 2013 new

(Quote) Kay-949541 said: That being said, I don't know a single woman in my generation who would consider it rude if you as...
(Quote) Kay-949541 said:
That being said, I don't know a single woman in my generation who would consider it rude if you asked them their age.
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Even being outside of your generation I don't consider it rude being asked my age. My weight on the other hand...laughing

Whenever I pick up a prescription at the pharmacy I'm either asked for my date of birth or address for verification. I'd like to think that I surprise them by always piping up with my date of birth.

As for Dan, if you're ever in a situation like that again, say something like "it's too bad that I'm too old for a <insert adjective here> lady like you." That way she can make the determination if you're too old with her response. Just don't get too discouraged if you get a "that's right, gramps" reply. laughing

Apr 18th 2013 new
(Quote) Tara-916865 said: A roundabout way is to ask which high school she went to, if it's locally, then maybe fi...
(Quote) Tara-916865 said:




A roundabout way is to ask which high school she went to, if it's locally, then maybe find a graduation year and do the math. Like, Oh, my cousin went there and graduated in '95.

--hide--


On the same note, a polite way to get around the religion issue is "Do you attend a church?" or "Where do you worship?"

This was a common question I was asked when I attended Baylor University (a Baptist school) ca. 2002.
Apr 18th 2013 new

I'd ask a question that may give you a hint as to her age (or range) like 'how's college coming along?' Something along those lines....

Apr 18th 2013 new
(Quote) Margaret-20183 said: Even being outside of your generation I don't consider it rude being asked my age. My we...
(Quote) Margaret-20183 said:



Even being outside of your generation I don't consider it rude being asked my age. My weight on the other hand...



Whenever I pick up a prescription at the pharmacy I'm either asked for my date of birth or address for verification. I'd like to think that I surprise them by always piping up with my date of birth.



As for Dan, if you're ever in a situation like that again, say something like "it's too bad that I'm too old for a <insert adjective here> lady like you." That way she can make the determination if you're too old with her response. Just don't get too discouraged if you get a "that's right, gramps" reply.

--hide--


That sounds like a great idea, Margaret.
Apr 18th 2013 new
(Quote) Elizabeth-943274 said: Is it just me, or does this seem like way too much pressure for a simple cup of coffee? There's somethi...
(Quote) Elizabeth-943274 said:

Is it just me, or does this seem like way too much pressure for a simple cup of coffee? There's something to be said for finesse, and you just can't be all Cary Grant smooth if you're interogating her about her age, her religion, her beliefs, etc. while standing in the check-out line.




Please listen to the instinct that says the person in front of you is interesting. The reason you would ask her out for a cup of coffee is so that you can have an actual conversation that's more conducive to finding out more about her, right? While we live in an age of immediate gratification in which information about people is available with a few clicks online, let's not forget that she's a human being worthy of being treated as a human being. Is a 30-minute cup of coffee really too much of an investment to make in another person, even if you never see her again?

--hide--


Good point too, about how it could and should be simple...
Apr 18th 2013 new
Dan, you could be with such and such an agency (governmental of course, but be vague) and ask the cute employee several questions including her age...(Always carry a notebook in case you need to use this method. It should work. laughing )
Apr 18th 2013 new

(Quote) Meg-920823 said: Dan, you could be with such and such an agency (governmental of course, but be vague)
(Quote) Meg-920823 said: Dan, you could be with such and such an agency (governmental of course, but be vague)
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Not a good idea.

If the relationship does go somewhere you're stuck dealing with the lie, and it may well be illegal even if one is vague about or uses the name of a fictitious agency (i.e., stating that you are a representative of a specific level of government may be sufficient to land you on the wrong side of the law).

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